you can’t breathe; there is an invisible weight on your chest. pressing. squeezing. killing. 

tell me how to fix this. tell me why i have to suffer. tell me- 

“you’re fine.” his eyes seemed frigid as he reassured you, his lips twisted into a sardonic grin. no you weren’t fine 

you turned away, not wanting to look any longer at his cruel visage. “leave.” you couldn’t look at him any longer. “wonwoo. you are dead to me.”

. . . 

you snickered as you watched yooa fiddle with her straw as she made a face at your previous comment. “ha.”

her tiny little face was scrunched up in a frown as she spoke. “how are you doing these days?”

you slammed your drink angrily on top of the melamine counter, the familiar stab of pain when you recalled what exactly that made you like this. unable to enjoy life in its full. ah, his wide smile, mischievous eyes, and soft hair. it was always there, swimming beneath the surface. it plagued you. 

“fine.” your voice was cold and controlled. 

yooa sighed, “i’m sorry.”

you shrugged, the energy leaving you as quickly as it had come. thinking of him tired you. “it’s okay.”

“let’s go somewhere today.”

“are you going to feed me?” you ask expectantly. 

the small girl sighs. “of course that’s what you ask.”

. . . 

and there it is. as soon as you stepped into the small fast food joint you cringe. your eyes had automatically honed in on his figure: tall and clad in formfitting dark jeans with a leather jacket to top it all off. 

pain. 

you want to run. you want to get as far away as possible, but you don’t. like a fool you stumble in through the restaurant trying to appear nonchalant and casual. like you were fine. he seemed fine. why weren’t you fine? it wasn’t fair. yooa lets out a sudden gasp. it was about time she noticed. 

“let’s leave, i wanted to go get chicken.” she was being too obvious, people were beginning to wonder why two girls were drifting awkwardly in front of the entrance. 

you try to stay nonchalant. “it’s whatever, let’s just get our food and go.” your eyes drifted once more back to his figure even though you know that the fleeting glance would only cause you pain. of course he was still okay. of course he hadn’t shattered like you did. of course he still had that same grin on his face that charmed you too quickly, too easily. 

your eyes met. and your heart cracked. 

he looked away. and your heart still lay in pieces. 

it was like the two of you never happened. maybe that was true for him, but it was the total opposite for you. 

the takeout chicken suddenly wasn’t so appetizing anymore. 

. . . 

where did you go wrong? the two of you maybe weren’t the perfect couple, but you always had your moments. but then again, what did a perfect couple mean anyway? maybe what you thought was good, just wasn’t good enough for him. 

you started dating wonwoo around a year ago, but had liked him for a lot longer. something about him just drew you in, or maybe it was just everything. his company was always solid and you felt as if he would never crumble under pressure. he always was able to cheer you up and give you a smile whenever you felt like you were breaking down. 

but something changed when he got a new job. you weren’t sure when, but suddenly wonwoo seemed detached from you. he seemed as if he had interests elsewhere and was preoccupied with work constantly. he would rarely take you out on dates and never went out for dinner together with the excuse, “sorry. working overtime today.”

you began to suspect something was the matter. was he cheating on you?

but when you confronted him with this claim, he shook his head and looked at you with sincerity. “no i did not cheat on you, i haven’t been with another woman.”

you let out a breath you were holding. 

“but it is true that i have been unfaithful emotionally.” his words froze your blood. “i truly am sorry. i don’t think we can continue this relationship.”

. . . 

it was hard to hate wonwoo. maybe he could have eased you into it, but it would have hurt you all the same. 

you tried to, but as an ex-boyfriend he made himself scarce from your life and tried to let you your wounds in peace. you appreciated that, it was much better compared to the suggestion, “let’s be friends.”

but something within you was lost. life no longer held the same allure and you struggled to be motivated to do anything. 

“i’ll be okay.”

. . . 

in a blinking of an eye, six months have gone by. 

the hurt had faded. and you got over him. 

so when you saw wonwoo walking in the streets with a stunningly confident woman, you only shook you head and said goodbye in your heart. because it was time you moved on. 

a/n a quick one. very stressed. bye.