"Would I rather be right or be happy?"

At YGE Building

To: My Baby Rin

Chaerin baby.. I wanna  go out and play with you  tomorrow..

Please :-(

Message sent

Flashback Earlier

I stared at Jiyong for the longest of time while holding the piece of paper in my hand. What is he up to this time? He actually gave up the idea of marrying me but I'm not even sure if he's really true to it though. I've known Ji for four years but never did I see this side of him. How could he do this to me? What am I gonna do? He thinks my life needs to be fix. What's there to fix anyway? But then, he made me realized one thing..

You have to stop this before its too late. Think of all the people you will hurt.. Ask yourself if you can you live with that? If not then stop this while you still can. I'm not giving up on you. I know you will do the right thing Dara.

Arghh.. Jiyong knows me so well.. How could he use my weakness to his advantage? He thinks Lee Chaerin is not good for me. I tried to convince  him how she is different but I guess I was the one who got disarmed. I know one way or the other our relationship will be exposed and a scandal like this will definitely destroy her.

​​​​​

That piece of paper was an agreement, an all-in paid in full fashion academe in France in exchange I'll end up everything with Lee Chaerin or else he will be forced to expose us. He is really something, he believed that his self righteous act will save me. I don't know if he is just pressed. But looking back, can I really live my life when someone is hurting because of me. Can I really do that to her family and mine? Why would I have to choose?

Anyway, I responded to Jiyong in accordance to his likings but I've never really decided yet. I don't want to spend my time with him while I'm weighing all my options.

End of flashback

Dara..

Dara..

Dara unnie.. focus.. Minzy just shook me out from my deep thoughts. What's wrong with you? Look, your finger is bleeding. A splintered of broken needle just gone into my index finger while working and I didn't even noticed it. Minzy ran out and came back with a med kit. She offered to treat the wound. She'd really changed a lot since then..

Then my phone rang..

Hello Jer..

The day after tomorrow.. Thank you so much.. Yeah, see you then..

bye..

Call ended..

Who's that? Minzy asked.. She must be intrigued since I was speaking in English. Nothing, just a friend I have to meet. I looked at my phone again. There's no reply from her. She must've been busy.

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO HER!?!

Oh geeez.. Minzy and I almost jumped out from our seat after hearing her loud voice behind us. No, it wasn't me.. Minzy retorted defensively. Calm down CL.. it was just an accident. I murmured. Minzy excused herself and went out to grab some lunch. What's wrong Dara? Why are you suddenly asking me for a date? Chaerinnie.. why do you ask so many questions? Nothing.. I just want to spend some time with you. But, if you're not available.. it's fine. I said softly. No, I have managed to move my schedule so I'll be free tomorrow. She did that for me? Really? then my tears suddenly came rolling down my face. What's wrong baby? Why are you crying? Chaerin wiped my tears dry. No, nothing's wrong Pudong-ah.. I'm just hungry. I know   it's such a lame excuse, I wonder why she'd still believe in that.

Most of the time, CL is just too obvious with her affection towards me. Her eyes cannot lie even on cameras. Her hands are already a permanent resident on my shoulder. People were already spreading rumors that we're a couple.. and that's my number one problem.. its like hinting for a time bomb to explode any moment in time. 

At the YG Dorm

I was staring blankly at my sketch pad. Chaerin is busy working 'til I dont know when and I'm still down on making my final decision. Then my tears just betrayed me countless of times. 

The next day..

​​​​I parked my car near her building.. we both agreed to dress stealthily.. Then, I saw her coming out wearing  purple oversize bomber jacket  and  black wide-leg lounge pants. We decided to go in an amusement park. But actually it was her idea. She loves to do the stuff that she missed out during her childhood years.  Both of us were walking side by side.. hoods up bare face with sunglasses on and a mask.

As we passed by the arcade, she suddenly grabbed my arm pulling me like a little kid who was let loose in the play pen. We had so much fun playing all the games and rides then finally we decided for some ice cream and sat on the bench while laughing and the melting ice cream in our hands. We should do this more often Dara unnie. She's back at it with her aegyo again. But then, her words took a pang in my chest knowing pretty well that this could be our last.

Where do you wanna go after this? Chaerin asked. The sun was about to set and I was thinking it would be better to go on high places for the view. So, we went to Namsan Seoul Tower but first, we passed by at the second floor to view the Teddy Bear Gallery. I still don't get it though.. Chaerin and bear stuffed toys obsession. We reached the top just in time to witness the sun setting in upon us.. 

Though its cliché, we still participated on leaving love messages on love locks. Chaerin wrote something on the lock.. and it read:

"If our love ceases to be.. that is the end of my world for me"

Promise me Dara you won't let go.. she said softly. My hands were shaking and my chest tighten as if I couldn't breathe in normally. I tried holding back my tears but it didn't work. Chaerinna. I moved closer to her and we both hugged each other. Darong, is there something wrong? It's just that you cry a lot these days. I gave her a quick peck on her cheek when no one was looking around.. then she gave me the greatest gift that I could ever ask for, her crescent moon shaped eye smile with her gently curved brows. My heart melted seeing her so innocently sweet and lovely. Everything will be alright Chaerinna.

We arrived at her place and as I parked right infront of her building, she was sleeping lIke a baby in the car seat beside me. "My Baby rin." I whispered gently as I took my time just watching her.  There's no turning back right now. I have to do this. I took a deep sigh as I felt the pain crawling inside me.  I never thought it would end up like this. I caressed her cheeks lightly. What will happen to us?

Hey, baby we're here. The moment she set her foot inside the house, she slumped her body right away to the couch and fell asleep. I sat by her side for a while. Although it was a long and tiring day, for me, it my very special day with her. I didn't notice but my shirt was already soaking wet with tears while her hair tenderly while her head was lying on my lap. I pulled out the folded paper on my jacket pocket and placed it over the center table.

I'm sorry Chaerinna. Before I could even stand up. Where are you going? I was frozen for moment.. did she hear what I've just said then my eyes turned to the letter I placed at the table. I.. I.. ummpphh. Lee Chaerin pulled me closer to her as she locked her lips to mine.. I was choking deep inside knowing my actions will definitely break her. Stay with me tonight Darong, I don't want to sleep alone.. She pleaded with her rounded innocent puppy eyes. I took a deep sigh and cupped her face with my hands then leaned forward kissing her eyes slowly and gently down to her nose then to her soft and supple lips. I will definitely miss you Chaerinna. We made love for the last time. Then, I left without saying a word.

Incheon International Airport

I have an early flight.. I saw Jiyong standing at the entrance. Here's your documents.. Hey, Dara.. cheer up.. you're making a good decision over this.. trust me. I didn't say much to him as my heart was so heavy leaving Chaerin behind. My flight was called and ready for boarding. I went in line for the final boarding procedure and  looked back, my eyes were searching and hoping someone will stopped me from doing this.

​​​​​​My eyes were tearing up again. It was fuzzy and I couldn't see clearly where I was walking. This is rather difficult for me, leaving everything behind. Can I really make it? I'm doing this with all good intentions though, but I know Chaerinna would never forgive me for doing this.

Should I go inside now?