Seungyeon realized that there was so many times lately where she felt to always explain her every action to Youngsaeng. This was one of the conditions, when she was being wrapped tight in Kyujong’s embrace. She didn’t know how long it was since he had been standing a few feet away, watching them. His gaze was calm as he walked closer, but she could sense the storm inside.

Not that she wanted to stay in that hug with Kyujong. She should’ve moved, pushed him away, but Youngsaeng’s sudden appearance messing her system. She couldn’t think properly nor did she hear thing Kyujong mumbled about. It was like everything in this world was simply a vague impression to her and Youngsaeng was the only one that apparent. He was the only one that mattered, how he thought and how he felt.

I’m dead.

***

The ride back home was awkward as hell for her. Youngsaeng appeared to be so composed from the beginning when he took her from Kyujong. He was playing a deaf ear, not giving any heed about Kyujong insistence of wanting to talk to Seungyeon. He was shouting, glaring angrily with red face while Youngsaeng was all polite but saying things in firm way, “I have to take my fiancée back with me now. See you around, Kim Kyujong-ssi.”

Kyujong would’ve punched him in the face for interfering, but he didn’t. The thing that stopped him was the helpless look on Seungyeon’s face. Through all the seconds when he was battling out with Youngsaeng, never once she jumped in the scene. All she did was keeping her self quiet, attention focusing on Youngsaeng with worried and guilty written all over her face. It made him felt defeated.

She doesn’t even seem to spare some thought about me.

He smirked sarcastically at himself when they left, feeling pathetic, but not losing any hope.

Well, she said she loves me.

***

“I’m angry.”

That was the first thing he said since they entered the car. He was sitting indifferently, hands on the steering wheel as they waited for the traffic light. She turned her head and found him looking far away outside the windshield.

“I’m sorry.” She sighed.

She could play a dumb game and asked him the reason why, but her heart knew that it was not necessary. As stupid as she would be, she knew it already; he was jealous and hurting too, probably. The strange side was, instead of feeling sorry, she sensed something warm inside. He was jealous and she kind of liking the idea.  

What’s wrong with me?

“In my usual self I’d probably say that it was not your fault so you don’t have to apologize, but I won’t now.”

The red turned to green, he sped up his car and so did his boldness. He was nothing near being nice―not that it meant he wanted to hurt her―he just wouldn’t back out in this war anymore. Kyujong could threat him all the way he wanted and tried every possible way to get her back, but he obviously wouldn’t just staying still without making any effort.

“I’m jealous.” He stated then laughing hard, awkwardly, after that.

“As crazy as I may sound, Seungyeon-ah, I will not let you slip away through my fingers. At least, not until you tell me that you are no longer want me in your life.”

Youngsaeng sounded so firm and determined when he said it. She tensed in the seat, massaging her temple.

***

She was too absorbed in her own thought of all the absurdness that happened to even realize that Youngsaeng didn’t bring her back home. It was already more than half of the ride when she finally saw the road was different. She was just about to ask when the smell of salty sea-breeze made its way to her sense.

It didn’t take a long time until she could see the sea right before her very eyes. The afternoon light of the almost setting sun was shimmering in the surface. She inhaled, took as much as her lung could, closing her eyes. Meanwhile Youngsaeng took a side glance at her as he searched spot to park the car.

It was empty. Maybe because it was not a day off, so there were no people around. Adding the fact that it wasn’t really a popular place where people would go sightseeing. They just sat idly inside until he took the first act and walked out of the car and she finally followed behind. They walked along the coast in silence, she had taken off her shoes and being barefoot. It was really nice to feel the cold breeze and sand tickling her skin. She was feeling full and frustrated she wanted to scream but didn’t. Things were too complicated and she was getting more confused.

In a swift crazy moment, a thought came inside her head and she turned around to see Youngsaeng who had been walking behind, watching her back. She looked him in the eyes, a lump in throat, breathing hard.

“Can you give me a hug?”

Youngsaeng was bewildered. Not even once he ever predicted that kind of wish would come out of . He was contemplating. It wasn’t like he didn’t want to, he would do anything to just being close to her, but his heart was full of doubt. She doesn’t love me and probably will leave me sooner or later; was all that his mind had.

He still pulled her into his embrace though in the end. Pressing their body so tight together while she clutched the jacket he was wearing. He pulled her closer and she suddenly felt less burdensome. A tear escaped her eyes. She cried in silence. He knew all along but smart enough to not taking any act and just hug her even tighter, while giving comforting rubs in her back once in a while. He understood that it was best to let her be.

“Otter-nim, I can’t stand it anymore, all this and lies. I think…we have to tell our parents the truth.”

***

He didn’t say a thing to her until the rest of their ride back home. Even when they already reached her place and she was about to leave him, he took a great control of himself to not spitting any sarcasm to her.

“Thank you. I will tell my parents tonight and then we will meet your parents tomorrow so-”

“No need to!” He cut her harshly. “I will tell them myself.”

She swallowed hard, feeling the urge to cry hearing his tone of speaking.

Oh well, what do I expect? For him to cheer on me?

She stared at him for a more while before finally bowing her head down.

“Then, I’ll be leaving. Thank you so much for the ride.” She went out of the car and shut the door closed behind.

I’m really sorry for hurting you like this, but this is necessary. I will tell you the reason when the right time comes.

She left, walking straight to the house’s gate with him watching unknowingly to her. Until the last second, he still had that strong desire to hold her back and snatch her far away where he could have her all to himself. He didn’t do it though. As much as he loved her, as much as he swore to fight for her, as much as he wanted to be egoist, he kept himself under control. He was afraid of the thought of hurting her.

Now that he is back, you’re going to ditch me this way. That brat, Kim Kyujong. So lucky, huh?!

***

Her mother freaked out when she told them the truth about her relationship with Youngsaeng at the dinner that night. Mr. Park who had known the games they were playing all this time, stayed calm. Meanwhile Gyuri, despite being shocked that her sister finally confessing the truth to whole family, went over to their mother who was close to being unconscious in her chair.

“Seungyeon-ah, how could you?!” Her mother had yelled at her.

“And by telling us this, what the meaning you hide behind? Don’t say that you want to cancel your engagement?!”

“Oh God! I can’t believe this, my daughter-”

The rest of the night was a mess in their house. Gyuri stayed in their parents’ room, accompanying the mother who was lying sick in the bed. Seungyeon made her blood-pressure increased with her sudden confession and the mother ended up refusing to see her. Her father gave a small pat in her shoulder after they bid the family doctor a goodbye.

“I have my own thought about your decision, but I believe that you are mature enough to know the consequences you’ll get later. I just hope the best for you two. If it’s possible, don’t hurt Youngsaeng too much, okay?”

And he left her struck in the middle of the living room.

***

She sent two short messages before hitting the bed around two in the morning. The first one was for Youngsaeng, telling him that she already said everything to her parents. Her mother was angry, but she could handle it by the time. The second one was for Kyujong. It was a reply, actually, for his endless un-picked calls.

To : Kyujong Oppa

Meet me tomorrow. 10 p.m. at the usual café where we used to meet.

****************************************************************************************

Author's note:

okay, you guys can throw rocks at me or everything, but first let me say "Hello!" *sigh* I finally can write again after being stuck in those assignments and exams of mine. I'm getting my holidays so I think I regain the writing sense I have. I'm sorry for being so so sooooooo late in updating, and thank you so much for the readers who keep their faith, checking on me once in a while. THANK YOU VERY VERY MUCH FOR THE SUPPORT YOU GUYS GIVE ME.

The story is getting really near to the end. to all the questions I got about who Seungyeon will be ended up with, hmmmm, you will find the answer soon enough. okay, enjoy this update and tell me what do you think about it. comments are always loved <33333

I'm off to write the next chapter. Bbyong!