It had been a week that Jong Kook hadn’t been able to contact Ji Hyo. All his calls to her went to voicemail and his message had never gotten reply. He called Shin Hye several times to ask to talk to Ji Hyo but Shin Hye always said Ji Hyo was busy. He knew Ji Hyo didn’t want to talk to him in purpose.

He went to her apartments more than 20 times. He rang the bell but no one answered. He got the key but he didn’t want to go inside her apartment without her permission. It would make her feel too uncomfortable and it would be the last thing he wanted to happen.

Reporters kept calling him for an interview but he chose to be silent. Since the scandal broke down, he never explained anything publicly even once. Not until he talked to Ji Hyo first. He felt like anything he tried to pronounce publicly would lead to more misunderstanding.

He couldn’t sleep the night before because he knew he would see Ji Hyo today. It was Running Man filming day. He prayed that Ji Hyo didn’t give up on Running Man because of him. He would not forgive himself if it happened. He was desperate to see her. Even if she wouldn’t talk to him, seeing her was good enough. He missed her like crazy.

He showed up early at the filming location to wait for her but there was a person that showed up sooner than him. It was Kang Gary.

“Hyung, can we talk in private?” – Gary asked

“Sure. Let’s go to our dressing room” – Answered Jong Kook.

They both walked to the dressing room. It was early in the morning so no one was there yet, just two of them.

Gary closed the door, making sure no one was around then he suddenly jumped to Jong Kook and hit him on the face.

“What the hell wrong with you?” – Jong Kook yelled and pushed Gary away.

“That is my question. What the hell wrong with you? “– Gary yelled and threw the newspaper on Jong Kook face.

Jong Kook’s kissing picture was on the front page, big and clear. Now he understood the situation.

“Gary ah, calm down. It was just a mistake.” – Jong Kook gently explained

“It is a big mistake hyung. How can you do this to Ji Hyo. I thought that you loved her sincerely, that’s why I quietly back out. But you disappointed me too much Hyung. How can you kiss another girl when you already have Ji Hyo?” – Gary jumped back to Jong Kook and pulled up his shirt collar. – “Do you know how devastated she was? She asked me out for a drink the other day but by the time I was there she already dead drunk. She cried in front of me hyung. She was a strong woman. She never cried. What did you do to her hyung? What the hell did you do that hyung?” – Gary screamed at Jong Kook face.

“I was wrong Gary ah. I tried to apologize to her but she didn’t want to talk to me.” – said Jong Kook, sadly. He didn’t even have the energy to push Gary away any more after hearing Ji Hyo was drunk and cried because of him.

“It would be a miracle if she wanted to ever talk to you again hyng.” – Yelled Gary and about to threw another fist at Jong Kook but a soft hand held him back.

“Don’t oppa” – Ji Hyo softly said. “I’m ok now” – She smiled sadly to Gary.

The anger was still burning in Gary body but her sad smile stopped him from attacking Jong Kook. He let go of Jong Kook’s collar and stayed beside Ji Hyo.

Ji Hyo glanced at Jong Kook. Their eyes met. For a moment, the sadness couldn’t be hidden in her eyes but she quickly concealed it with a lively smile.

“How are you doing hyungnim?” – Ji Hyo brightly greeted Jong Kook.

Her smile was so bright, her voice was so cheerful but it hurt Jong Kook so badly. She just called him “hyungnim”, just like 5 years ago, when they first met, when they were … strangers …

“Let’s go oppa” – Ji Hyo asked Gary, with her arm around his, they left the room leaving Jong Kook alone in devastation.

“To her now, I’m just a stranger.” – That sad thought kept pulling Jong Kook down.

“Are you ok Ji Hyo?” – Gary gently asked

“Yeah, I’m ok oppa” – her voice was lower a little. It took her all the strength earlier to fake a smile in front of Jong Kook. Looking at him was the hardest thing that she had ever done. She wanted to run up to him and check if he hurt but she had to stop herself from doing that. They were nothing anymore.

 He had a new woman. She didn’t want to make him uncomfortable. That was the reason she tried to smile. So he would think she was ok even though she was not. They had to work together not only today but in the future as well. She couldn’t make him uneasy. When they started their relationship, they promised each other that despite what might happen, they would be professional at work, not only for themselves but also for people around them. That was their commitment, and she wanted to stick to that.

The Running Man casts showed up one by one. They all looked at Jong Kook and Ji Hyo with the concerned eyes as they all read Jong Kook scandal. They tried to avoid Jong Kook kissing topic in front of Ji Hyo. Once the camera started, they all pushed aside the awkward atmosphere and be professional.

That day episode was “Real Man competition”. Ji Hyo was relieved since she was the MC so it was positive that she didn’t have to team up with Jong Kook. She was also happy knowing that ZE:A joining the program. She had been closed to them since she joined Star Empire. They treated her as their real noona and took good care of her especially Dong Jun. They had been hanging out together often since Ji Hyo helped him out with his acting too.

Jong Kook couldn’t hide his jealous glance when he saw Ji Hyo was closed to Dong Jun. She was too cheerful when she was with Dong Jun. Jong Kook wasn’t sure if it was just an act or it was their real relationship but he was upset. He kept his eyes on them the entire filming.

A long filming day was done with success. They all had fun with the games even though it was really tiring. The PDs asked the cast and guests to join them for dinner to celebrate a successful filming day and they all agreed. The party started at a BBQ restaurant. Everybody enjoyed their food and drink. Dong Jun stayed closed to Ji Hyo. He was very obvious about taking care of Ji Hyo. In the middle of all the staff and guests, he wasn’t shy putting food on the plate for her or ordering water for her to make sure she would not be affected by alcohol.

Ji Hyo was glad that Dong Jun cared for her but she also concerned about Jong Kook feeling. Even though they were nothing anymore, she still wanted to show some respect to him. She didn’t want him to misunderstand her relationship with Dong Jun. She randomly glanced at Jong Kook to check on his reaction. Every time she did, she saw him staring at her as well. His eyes were sad. He drank a lot. She was worried. It hurt her seeing his sorrow.  

The fun party wasn’t stop at the restaurant. Everybody was drunk and liked to have a little more fun so they decide to come to a private Karaoke bar. Because of Shinwah and ZE:A, the party was never seemed to stop. Both amazing boybands kept showing off their cool and talent. They danced and sang like in the real stage.

 All the casts and guests were supper excited. Only two people were still in their gloom space, randomly checked on each other and felt sad by themselves. When did the two people used to be so closed now be so far even they were just a few seats a way. They both wondered if one of them moved to one seat closer, what would happen. But they both didn’t have enough courage for that. They put their sorrow in soju. They both drank continuously but the soju did not seem to be enough to fill the emptiness in their soul.

After being pushed about a thousand times by everybody, Ji Hyo decided to sing a song. She chose the song “Like being hit by a bullet” by Beak Ji Young, the only song that matched her emotion at that moment. Everybody had high expectation for the song. ZE:A cheered out loud as their noona walked to the stage.

 Someone suggested Jong Kook to do the duet with Ji Hyo since he did the duet with Beak Ji Young on stage before for the same song. Jong Kook rejected the idea at first but people kept chaining his name so he had to go on stage with Ji Hyo. They were both felt awkward. Only the casts and Dong Jun knew why.

(A/N: This is the link of the song if you want to feel their emotion https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YtgA89uFAlM)

(Ji Hyo)

Like being hit by a bullet
I cant make sense of anything
All that comes out is laughter
So I just laughed,
So I just laughed,
Just..
(Jong Kook)

While Im laughing until I collapse
I asked if I could ask one thing
Why are we breaking up?
How do we break up?
How do we break up?
How?
In this bruised chest,
Our memories are overflowing
Even though I try hold onto them,
Even if I block my chest,
They all slip though my fingers
(Ji Hyo)

Even if my heart stops,
Just like this,
I dont think it will hurt,
Please do something
Give me some treatment
If I keep going like this,
All I will get is a broken heart
In this bruised chest..
Soon, without me even realizing,
Tears stream down my face
I dont want to be like this,
I really dont want to,
I really dont want to,
Really..

(Jong Kook)
I follow you as you got up, and tan blindly after you, 
You’re running away, 
From behind you, 
From behind you, 
I scream.. 

(Ji Hyo)
In this bruised chest, 
Our memories are overflowing 
Even though I try hold onto them, 
Even if I block my chest, 
They all slip though my fingers 
Even if my heart stops, 
I dont think it will hurt this bad, 
Please do something 
Give me some treatment 

(Jong Kook)
If I keep going like this, 
All I will get is a broken heart 
Like being hit by a bullet 
Really.. 

(Ji Hyo and Jong Kook)
My heart hurts so much 
It hurts so much, 
It hurts so much, 
Thats weird I can still live. 
How can I forget you? 
Me? 
I dont know how to do such things.. 
I dont know.. 
My heart is awake and I can’t put it to sleep, 
All it does is hurt so much I feel like dying, 
Like being hit by a bullet...

Ji Hyo didn’t have a good voice. She couldn’t reach all the high notes but the sadness that she expressed was perfect. A gloom atmosphere spread through the karaoke bar. People felt the sorrow in her voice as well as Jong Kook’s. The whole audience was quiet looking at the two singing. Some of them didn’t know what happened between Jong Kook and Ji Hyo but they all felt a deep cut in both of the singers’ hearts.

The song was like a letter that they expressed their pain to each other. Every word in that song was exactly how they felt in their heart, like being hit by a bullet. When they first started the song, they kept their eyes on the TV to read the lyrics but after a several verses, they couldn’t help but kept looking at each other.

Ji Hyo tears started coming out when she sang the part

“In this bruised chest,
Our memories are overflowing
Even though I try hold onto them,
Even if I block my chest,
They all slip though my fingers
Even if my heart stops,
I don’t think it will hurt this bad,
Please do something
Give me some treatment

She tried to hold her emotion but it wasn’t easy when the guy that just broke he heart singing so sorrow right next to her. Her tears unconsciously rolled down as she looking at him. He was also devastated. He reached his hand up to her cheek and wiped her tears as he sang

My heart hurts so much 
It hurts so much, 
It hurts so much, 
That’s weird I can still live. 
How can I forget you? 
Me? 
I don’t know how to do such things.. 
I don’t know.. 
My heart is awake and I can’t put it to sleep, 
All it does is hurt so much I feel like dying, 
Like being hit by a bullet...”

Both their trouble hearts were really painful at that moment. It was so hard looking at the person they loved most crying and devastating in front of them but they couldn’t do a thing about that. They were both hurt so much. Ji Hyo felt like a big knot tied . She couldn’t sing anymore when Jong Kook putted his hand on her cheek. His caring gesture just hurt her even more. She slipped away from Jong Kook’s hand in front the audiences’ surprised eyes.

She walked straight to the parking lot in tears. Dong Jun immediately got up and followed her.

“I will take you home noona” – Dong Jun gently said as he caught up with Ji Hyo

She nodded slightly. She was still choking with tears and couldn’t talk. Her legs were weak that she couldn’t even walk probably. Dong Jun had to carry her to his car.

“Let’s me take her home” – Jong Kook yelled as Ji Hyo was about to entered Dong Jun car.

“If it was a few weeks ago, you would have the right to take her home but today, I’m afraid not hyung. You have done enough.” – Dong Jun said and gave Jong Kook an angry glare. He continued putting Ji Hyo in the passenger seat and closed the door.

“Please tell everybody that noona was tired and I have to take her home first. You can come back and enjoy your party.” – Said Dong Jun as he closed his door and left. Jong Kook was still standing at the parking lot looking at their car disappearing in the dark. His tears rolled down. Dong Jun was right. He no longer had the right to take her home. He lost his right. He lost her …