At the dawn of morning before the sun comes out, I am awake. I slither out of mine and Soonie’s room quietly careful not to wake her. My phone was buzzing like crazy in my jean pocket. That damn manager doesn’t know how to freaking wait. Quickly and quietly I slipped on my big black hoodie over my outfit and headed out the door. My large duffle bag filled with overnight things was slung on my shoulders. I grabbed an apple. Just as I was about to put my hand on the door knob, I was stopped by a soft tired voice.

                “Sam?” I turned my head slightly in shock. No one is supposed to be up now. Today is their day off. There is nothing on the schedule today. I made sure of that. Mimi stood in front of her room door not completely awake. She had on her favorite pink big bunny pjs. The pink ears from the hood of the pjs flopped down to the side slightly bent. Strand of her short light blue hair appeared from underneath the hood. I let out a soft smile as I turned completely to the now yawning girl. Mimi lifted her hand up to rub her eyes. Hard to believe she is two years older than me. “Where are you going?” She let out in a childlike voice.

                “I am going on a variety show today.” I let out in a whisper. I don’t want to wake anyone else up. Especially Ran. “I will be back tomorrow afternoon.”

                “Variety show? It wasn’t in the schedule?”

                “It was last minute. Jon told me last night.”

                 Mimi nodded as she ahhed out loud. Jon is known for making last minute schedule arrangements. It always pissed us all off, but we learned how to deal with it. She then let out a carefree smile that seemed to shave years off her face.

                “Make sure you are back in time tomorrow. We start shooting our new music video.” She breathed out. She then brought her fisted hands up to her chest and gave me a friendly smile. “Fighting.”

                I smiled back at her nodding my head. With one last goodbye, I walked out the door locking it behind me. How could I forget that tomorrow is the start of our music video shoot? I let out a groan once I entered the elevator. I pressed the ground floor button and waited for the large metal box to move me down five floors.  Tomorrow is going to be a long day. Heck, it’s going to be a long couple of months. This comeback is going to kick our .

                Once I made it outside the building, I noticed the sun was still slowly rising. I glared at the large black van waiting for me. The back door was already slid open and inside sat my annoying manager supporting a tired scowl on his young face. He motioned for me to hurry up.

                “What was taking you so …oomph.” Jon let out as I threw my duffle bag for him to catch. I snorted as the bag hit him and he fell back onto the floor of the car. Quickly after climbing in, I buckled up. You know, safety first. Jonnny boy let out a loud groan getting up from the ground. “What do you have in there bricks.”

                “Yeah. Just in case a monster attacks me.” I breathed out sarcastically.

                “You’re a brat. I hope a monster attacks you.”

                “That’s not nice.”

                “Neither are you! Do you know how much scolding I had to go through because of you? After arguing with the President almost all day I finally got you on the show. But I have mountains of paper work to do as a punishment.” Jon growled. He moved up to the driver seat quickly starting the car. And soon enough we were off. “What did you tell, Ran?”

                “Nothing. I left a note on my pillow.” I let out. I slouched on the chair burying myself deeper into my hoodie. Letting my head softly rest against the window, I watched the cars and scenery we passed. Slowly my mind drifted to yesterday. Remembering the tears Ran shed as she yelled about the hateful comments online. After my walk last night, I came back to the dorm to see BoA and Ran laughing happily while watching Running Man together. Ran immediately yelled at me for being out to late. The tears she shed and the words she said in front of me were long forgotten. I let out a sigh looking out. I hope these comments would just stop. I wish we were friends.  “Anyways Mimi saw me this morning so I know she will tell Ran.” I informed Jon. The brunette man nodded his head in approval then focused back on the road. “Where are we going?”

                “Muju.” Jon let out. “We should be there in a few hours maybe two and a half. Maybe more. It all depends on how fast I drive. Before we get there, we have to go over some rules.” I let out groan focusing my narrowed eyes at the rearview mirror. Jon’s eyes met mine through the mirror. His eyes held so much authority. It was as if he was demanding me to shut up and listen. “During the time of your filming you are not to get overly friendly with Kim Jaejoong.”

                “Overly friendly?” I let out confused. What do the…then I ‘ahhed’ out loud. “You don’t want me to flirt with him? Really, Jon. I am not some desperate girl to throw myself-“

                “Will you let me finish?” He hissed. I rolled my eyes then lifted my hand up motioning for him to continue. “You are not to get overly friendly with Kim Jaejoong. I already informed the producer of the show that you are not to be on the same team as him in anything.” I let out a low growl in anger. That damn bastard! Now, how am I supposed to complete my mission in reuniting the guys? I got to think of something unless I get the producer to ignore what Jon told him. Highly doubt it. Everyone out there always does what SM says because we are such a big company with a huge fan base.  Damn you, Jon. “During your time there you must keep up with your image. Try not to ruin it with your horrible personality.” I breathed out offended. “I mean it, Sam. Don’t act like yourself? You have to keep up with your image.”

                “You mean my image of staying bright and bubbly. A positive and sweet foreigner who can turn completely charismatic when given a mic.”

                “Exactly. See you got it. Just keep that image up and we shouldn’t have a problem.” Jon continued. “Remember you can’t wet your hair. No one can know you have natural curly hair. And please don’t let them see the tattoos you have. Use the makeup to cover them.”

                I let out a sigh looking back out the window tuning him out as he kept going. Yes, I have tattoos. I got them while I went to visit my grandmother a few years ago in America. The company wasn’t very happy when they found out. I was still a trainee at the time. Let’s just say they didn’t believe me when I told them that my mom made me get it. You don’t believe me either, don’t you?

 I swear! My mom is insane.

One day, we are just walking the streets of New York laughing and joking and the next she drags me to a tattoo parlor. Long story, short. After much arguing we ended up with matching white tiger tattoos over the right side of our ribs. Dad was pissed too, if you want to know. He got over it knowing that my mom is crazy. Well, I liked the tiger so much that before I left to go back to Korea I got two more tattoos. Behind my left ear a small black elegant looking treble clef rest representing my love for music. And across my back intricate detailed branches along with flowers of a Japanese Cherry Blossom tree rests in form of wings over each shoulder blade. Most of the time I kept the tattoos hidden under heavy makeup and cloths. Especially the tattoo on my back.

                The whole entire drive Jon kept on with the dos and don’ts.

Do! Smile brightly and keep up an innocent face.

Don’t! Get sarcastic over every little thing.

Do! Promote the Violets and show everyone in Korea that SM made peace with Jaejoong and everyone in JYJ.

Don’t! Get too close to Jaejoong.

During the whole agonizing speech I would make sounds to let him know I understood. I will do everything that is expected of me. Yeah right! I kept my mischievous smile hidden while I did my makeup. Like hell am I going to be fake in front of everyone. I am tired of keeping up this image. I am tired of keeping who I really am away from everyone. I am so sick and tired of all the cover ups the agency did when I tried to be myself in front of the camera.  I am tired of always straightening my hair because no one should know I have extremely curly hair. I’m tired of hiding my tattoos because my image is innocence. I always had to hold this in. Always have to keep up with their rules because I am living my dream.

You know last night while I was walking through the streets waiting for time to pass, waiting for the whole thing with Ran to pass. I saw something. I saw myself alone with Mimi on tv. It was the episode of the Dream Team we filmed together. The way I acted, the way I was.

It wasn’t me. Seeing that last night ignited something in me.

It’s time to show them who I really am.

                Jon and the agency are going to kill me.

                “We’re here.” I heard Jon let out.

 I smiled brightly as I looked out the window. It is so beautiful here. The traditional homes covered in the foliage of mountains, green trees, and clear streams. The sun shined above brightly as if to signify a great day. I felt the car vibrate as it went slowly over the gravel. I could see the film crew standing in front of the confused cast members as Jon pulled the car next to them. The cast members looked at my car in confusion wondering who was in it. I know they can’t see me because of the tinted windows. I can hear Yoo Jae Suk and Suk Jin ask if there was another guest. The producer informed the cast that there was one more last minute guest. Who is the other guest?

I felt my heart pick up in excitement as I saw them motion for me to get out. Half the camera’s focusing on the car while the other half focused on the cast members. I grabbed my duffle bag slinging it over shoulder while breathing in and out in order to calm my racing heart. Ignoring Jon’s last warning, I slid open the back door revealing myself to the cast of Family Outing with a bright smile.

It was supposed to be perfect and easy. I step out of the car. They are all shocked about my appearance and they freak out. They can’t believe I am on the show. That’s how it always is when a member of a famous SM group goes on variety shows.  

Well that’s how it was supposed to go.

My didn’t notice that my duffle back was caught on the seatbelt. The elastic safety harness pulled back on my duffle bag just as I was stepping out. It caught me by complete surprise making me lose complete balance.

It all happen in slow motion.

I can hear the worried yells from everyone as I squealed out loud. I fell out of the car face first. Luckily I moved my hands in front of my face to block graveled ground from marking it. I felt the heavy weight of the duffle bag slam down on my dangling legs that was stuck in the van. Pain shot down from my legs to my hips. I let out a groan using my hands to lift my upper body up. I looked behind me to see my legs dangling in a tangled mess in the air. I can hear some people run towards me in worry in order to help me detangle myself from the damn seatbelt and duffle back.

“Dammit, Sam!” I can hear Jon groan as he slapped his forehead.

I let out another groan. Dropping my head back down on the ground so no one can see my red cheeks. This is so embarrassing.

Who falls out of a car?

 Apparently me.  I can practically feel all the camera’s burning a hole in my head. If this airs. Oh god, if this airs. I would never hear the end of it from everyone. Especially mom. She will have a field day. Hell, she will put that on record. This is going to be the ‘Forever 21 incident all over again’.

Kill me now.

                “Are you ok?” I heard a soft husky voice let out in worry.

I can feel this person come close to me bending down.  I felt a hand softly touch my shoulder. Sparks immediately shot through my body upon feeling his hand. My heart picked up in excitement. Goosebumps rose up from my arms as a soft shiver encompassed my body.

What’s going on?

 I lifted my head slowly to see who it was. I soon came face to face with none other than the man I came here for. His eyes widen with recognition knowing who I was. I couldn’t stop staring at his dark brown orbs completely transfixed by them. I then took in him soft angelic features.  His dark red shaggy slightly permed hair shined under the sunlight. His jawline was so straight and masculine looking. This man is better looking in person. Like wow! It should be illegal to be that hot.

“Oh. It’s Ami from Violets.” I heard a couple people gasp out.

“We should detangle her.” A female’s voice let out in worry.

“You really know how to make an entrance.” Peniel chuckled.

A couple of them members joined him as they muttered jokes while they made their way towards me. I can hear the scrap of their shoes as they made their way towards my legs. Soon enough, I can feel different pair of hands working on detangling my legs. While that was going on I can hear the cast members murmur in surprise that I was there. I need to focus on my problem at hand not staring at some gorgeous guy in front of me.

 Man! Do I have an urge to jump him?

What?

No! Focus, Sam! You have a mission. A mission for the greater good! You owe this to Yunho and Changmin and all Cassie’s out there! You cannot be attracted to your target. You are not here for this!

I shook my head to take myself away from the spell this gorgeous man had me in. He seemed to be doing the same.

“Here. Let me help.” He breathed out.

I stayed completely quiet and still while Jaejoong put his hands under my arms. With the help of him and Suzy, who helped dust me off. I was happily detangled and standing up straight on my own two feet.

“Ami? Your arms!” Suzy gasped out in shock.

Everyone immediately looked down at my arms in worry. Yoo Jae Suk immediately ran to go get some first aid. I looked at them confused then looked down at my arms.

“Why am I not surprised?” I breathed out upon seeing the damage. Small gravel rocks stayed stuck to my palm and most of my arm from my wrist to my elbow. Blood came out in tiny rivers from the fresh scratches the gravel caused. I looked back up at the worried cast members and let out a laugh in hopes to ease them. I can see the staff behind them trying to find the first aid kit. “Sorry! I’m pretty clumsy.”

“We saw that.” Jackson let out in a laugh.

“My bad. I hope I didn’t freak you guys out a lot.” I let out. The members smiled at me and quickly made jokes making me laugh with them. There was much excitement as I was introduced to everyone including the two guest Lim Kim and Daesung from Big Bang. “Do you think they are going to air my fall?”

“Are you kidding? They are going to air then made dramatic noises in the background.” Jackson laughed along with Peniel and Woo Bin. Suzy quickly hit them both scolding them immensely with Suk Jin.

“Does this happen a lot?” I heard Jaejoong let out softly as his hand softly touched my arm. I turned to him in shock to see him lift my arm up softly. With his other hand he carefully took off some of the gravel. I simply stood frozen studying him in shock as he picked out the small pebbles from my arm with concentration. His dark eyes then focused back on my face. We just stared at each other in silence. My heart raced violently in my chest. “Ami? Are you ok?”

Get a hold of yourself woman!

I quickly shook my head as I pulled away from his grip. Jaejoong stared at me in confusion. My breathing turned rapid. I am starting to have a hard time trying to calm my beating heart.

“Is this..!!!” Jackson gasped in shock looking between me and Jaejoong.

Both he and Daesung smiled deviously. The looked at each other then back at me and Jaejoong. The red head man next to me quickly let out a groan.

“Here we go.” Jaejoong muttered under his breath.

“They are going to get stupid.” Woo Bin said. I turned my head towards him in confusion not understanding what is going on. The tall man just gave me a smirk as he handed me a water bottle to drink. “Here. You’re going to need this.”

I gingerly took the drink, muttering my thanks to him.

“I believe it is, guys! I can’t believe we are witnessing this in real life.” Peniel let out in a gasp. He came between Jackson and Daesung grabbing them by their shoulder. I started drinking my water thinking they were gonna say something completely irrelevant. “And to think it is with our precious Jaejoong Hyung!”

What are they talking about?

“You guys don’t start.” Suzy begged.

“We aren’t starting anything.” Daesung let out innocently.

                “We are just pointing out this amazing sight we are witnessing. I mean this is once in a life time.”  Peniel responded.

                “What’s once in a life time?” I let out taking a break from drinking.

                Daesung, Peniel, and Jackson immediately looked at me. Their smiles getting wider. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion. Ok. They are getting weirder by the minute. I quickly heard Yoo Jae Suk come up behind me with the first aid kit. I took a large chug of my water just as I turned around to face him.

“Love at first sight.” The three mischievous men let out in a sing song voice.

Understanding what they meant, I did what anyone would do in my position. I spat out my water in shock. They were talking about me and Jaejoong. My heart sped in excitement as heat rushed to my cheeks. I was so overwhelmed by my own thoughts that I didn’t even realize I just showed Yoo Jae Suk with my spit.

This mission is going to be harder than I thought.