this is a short update

JESSICA’S POV

I was now in a 24th Seoul Music Awards to receive my award which is Daesang awards/Artist of the year award, Bonsang award as number 2 and also popularity award. And I was proud that I really win this all without my family connection, all my awards for the past 3 5months is real and not manipulated, I don’t want also to do it anymore because I know my fans won’t disappoint me and the will vote for me.

I also am going to perform my single. I was now in the dressing room. SNSD sub group was here also to receive Bonsang awards as number 11. My stylist was now preparing me for my performance; unfortunately I was in the table with TTS and other artist.

This past few weeks, SNSD is just like before, we hang out and eat dinner sometimes in our favorite restaurant, Dara unnie, Hara ah and Yeon sometimes came along, but sometimes they aren’t, some other time I went to their dorm which is also my dorm before. My bed was still there and intact, my closet was still empty, they said that it was for me so nobody was using it. And honestly I was guilty of something, AGAIN!

FLASHBACK

I was in SNSD dorm and came visit them; this is one of the rare days that my rest day is actually the same with them. I was now sitting on the living room with Yul and Seobaby. Yoong, Soo and Hyo were buying some snack while Bunny, Taengoo and Tiff are in the kitchen preparing lunch.

This past few weeks also became a hobbit with Tiff and I to avoid each other not like really avoid but we keep our distance, for me I don’t want to happen again what happen before, I don’t want to hurt her more when she insisted something again and I give in, it will hurt her more when I know I can’t offer anything because I was attach and don’t know what is my feelings for her.

“Unnie, what’s your next plan?”

“What do you mean Seobaby?”

“I mean in your hectic schedule, do you still have plans on making it more hectic?”

“Oh in my career you mean?”

“Yes unnie?”

“After my collaboration with 2ne1 I think I have a comeback preparation and also planning to have a US debut.”

“WOW, US debut? You really amazing unnie.”

“Sica, you really did it, your much popular than SNSD now.”Yul

“You know I’m not.”

“You are Sica, after six months of your debut as a soloist and then you’re going to have a US debut that early.” Sunny who join us

“I’m just lucky because of my friend recommended me on SONY entertainment and they like my voice, and they’re contacting me this past few days.”

“So when are you going to debut in US?”

“Actually I still didn’t accept their invitation so I don’t know.”

“WHAT?” Yul/Seo/Sunny

“Hey what happen? Most famous singer in US was from that company.” Tiff also joins us

“Yes, what happen and you shout?” Taengoo

“SONY entertainment was contacting Sica for a debut in US and still didn’t accept it.” Sunny said

“Are you nuts?” Tiff

“Hey I’m not, I’m not saying I won’t accept it but not now, I’m still busy with my collaboration then I have a comeback in the line and I’m still filming a drama. I don’t know how to manage my time if I accept it now.”

“You’re right, you shouldn’t stress yourself so much, our misunderstanding will go to waste if you keep pushing yourself.” Taeng

“Maybe after my collaboration and comeback I’ll accept it, they already said that they’re willing to wait for me until I accept it.”

“That’s great unnie, you shouldn’t let this opportunity slip away.” Seo

“I know, I just don’t have time for now. I still have company to run too.”

“About that? How’s your company Sica?” Taengoo and I are getting close again us friends

“We are now going to launch summer collection. And were planning on opening branch to NY.”

“Being a CEO doesn’t suit you, lazy Jessica Jung.” Yul teases

“YAH!” I punch her shoulder

“But Yul was right Sica.” Taengoo told me and laugh before she goes back on the kitchen

“Maybe I’m too beautiful for the title.” I told them confidently

“Conceited much?” Tiff said and chuckle, she walks to the kitchen also

“Why do you keep on tease me, all of you?” I told them loud for the people on the kitchen also hears

“Because we love you unnie, so accept the fact that being an enthusiastic as a CEO doesn’t suit you.” Seobaby also laugh at me

“I forgive you all but you just bully me.” I pout

“Ewww….Sica, being a CEO suit you more that pouting.” Yul told me with a disgusting look but laugh in the end

“Maybe you can’t just resist me Seobang.” I trace her jawline with my fingertip before I bite my lip

“Yah! Don’t come near me. Fany ah, help me.” Yul stand up and run into the kitchen while I just laugh there with Seo also laughing

“What’s so funny Unnie?” Yoong told me, they arrive already, she sit beside me

“I just tease Yul and I can’t forget her face.” I continue to laugh

“Did you just prank the pranksters Sica? I saw Yul’s face and it was so red like a tomato.” Hyo said and sit on the sofa

“We were joking and then I don’t know what to counteract so I kinda seduce her.” I tried to stop my laugh but I miserably failed

“Sica unnie really is seductive earlier, you can see on Yul unnie face.” Seo

“The lunch is ready guys and Sica don’t do that to Yul.” Sunny told me I know she’s just preventing her smile

“Okay, I won’t do that to her again, maybe one of you next time.” I smirk and walk on the kitchen

“Sica/Unnie.” I heard them calling me and then when I entered the dining I saw Yul, I smirk at her and she bows her head low

“Yul….” I called her sweetly

“Stop it Sica, she was terrified.”

“But Taengoo.” I pout and walk near her

“S-sica…”

“I just prank her Taengoo. I didn’t know she’ll be like this.” I whisper in her ears and I can see that her ears and face became red also, I laugh at her and then walk to the table and sit on my chair, it was still there

“Sica, d-don’t do t-hat again.” Taengoo

“What? I didn’t do anything? I just whisper.” I act innocently

“YAH Sica, don’t do that to us.” Hyo siad

“Unnie won’t do that to me, right Unnie?” Seo told me

“Of course Seobaby you’re included.” I chuckle

“UNNIE!” She whines and I just laugh but the truth was I was nervous as wreck because of what I did to Taengoo

I just act normal because I want our friendship to be back but I’m still uncomfortable being close to her. Not until my feelings for her is still there, I don’t know if it’s like before but I’m sure there was still a part of me wishing that we’re still together. But there was a part of me saying that it was for the better like this.

We just started to eat and talk like usual; we always do this before talking and teasing each other while eating. When we finish eating I volunteer to wash which is rare before, Yeon told me that I better learn to help or volunteer so people won’t call me lazy, we argue about that and she won.

“Wow, Sica you really volunteer to wash? Is the world going to be doom?” Hyo ask me

“Shut up Hyo, Yeon told me not be lazy anymore so I know now to help and volunteer in house chores.”

“Wow, what did Jiyeon do to you and you became like this even Taeng can’t force you before.” I became stiff Soo stop her sentence and I know Yul saw it so she answer Soo

“Maybe because Yeon didn’t spoil our ice princess here not like us.” She chuckle so I chuckle even it was fake

“Now go to the living room and do what you have to do and leave me alone here, I’ll be there after I’m finish here.” I told them and continue my chores but not long after I felt someone at my side and when I glance, it was her, Taeyeon.

“I’ll help you so you can be done fast and then we can join them.” She started to help me before I even protest so I just let her

When we are in the middle of washing it I felt some water on my face and when I look on the person who was responsible for it she was smiling at me widely before she repeats her action and again and again until I return it.

“Take that Sica.”

“Stop it Taengoo, I’m so wet already.” I wipe my cheek that was so wet

Then she came near me with a tissue in hand and started to wipe my face for me, I also get some tissue to wipe hers, we are wiping each other’s and our face was so near that I can feel her breathe already. She was staring at me and I was staring back at her. And then she leans in slowly…..

“Jessi, Tae-tae what took you so---” Tiff came in and we back away from each other and then I look on Tiff and I can the pain in her eyes again

“T-tiff.’

“---long? Y-you can continue and b-be at the l-living room after.” She said before she turn her back and started to walk away, I can see that she wipes her cheek, she was crying. I want to comfort her but I can’t

“ Hmm?*scoff* Let’s continue to wash dishes and clean the mess.” Taengoo told me

I nodded, it was so close, what if Tiff didn’t barge in, we are so close on kissing. I have a girlfriend but once again I almost let someone kiss me, especially if that someone is my ex. I continue to clean up and when we are done, I told her I’m going to the washroom.

I left immediately there and to my luck in the three bathrooms the only available was the one near Tiff’s room. When I walk pass living room I saw that Yul, Soo and Tiff wasn’t there. And the others told me that the two was on the washroom while the latter was in her room. I was near to the washroom when I heard sob; Tiff’s door was slightly open. It took me a thousand scolding of me before I walk pass her room and step in the washroom.

I took 15minutes in the washroom before I walk out and when I look at Tiff’s room it was already close. So I proceed to the living room. They are all there and watching some movies. I sat beside Yul who was sitting beside Yoong. Taengoo was on the side of Sunny while Tiff was on the far corner of the sofa, she was spacing out. I know it because I know her when she was spacing out; she was staring blankly on the TV.

I was supposed to be in their dorm till dinner but got interrupted when my manager suddenly called for emergency schedule that day so I had to leave early. I said goodbye to them and it was really awkward when it comes to the one who almost kiss me and the one who caught it.

 END OF FLASHBACK

That was what I’m guilty about, I almost cheat on my GF again with my ex, who was pursuing me before and I don’t if it was until now. My manager walk in and told me it was time for my performance and I should be in the backstage already, so I did and there was the TTS who’ll going perform after me.

“Unnie, Fighting.” Seo hug me

“Thank you Seobaby.”

The other two smiled at me so I smiled back. I went to the stage and greet the audience and the fans, it was a full theater, so many fans and artist are here tonight. My GF group wasn’t here but Yeon wants to support me so she says she going to come after her schedule. After my performance some awards was given included the popularity award which given to me.

It was now TTS performance and I was sitting in our table, I really envy that sub group and I don’t deny it, before the reason was Taengoo but now I don’t know but I really felt some kind of envy towards them.

(I’ll include the incident of Taeyeon but I’ll change something or I’ll exaggerate it a bit.)

When their performance ends it was time for the Bonsang awards. The people who’ll give the awards speak and one by one from the bottom to the top was called. Everyone is in the stage including me. When the awards were given each and every one was already walking down to the stage until something happen that makes my world slow down.

Taengoo falls into a hole with a meter deep and she fell backwards and became unconscious. I don’t know what to do, I was just standing there and looking at the scene while everyone is also shock but some already was on her side.

The medics were also there and she was brought to a stretcher, she was still unconscious. Someone nudge me and it was one of the artists that give me back to the reality. Everyone is now evacuating the stage so I also started to walk down the stage, I was back now in my table but my mind wasn’t here. What did the hell happen? How is she? Is she injured so much? I can’t think straight right now.

I just stare at the stage and didn’t care around me not until I was called again to receive the main award which is Artist of the year. I give some speech which I don’t know how I pulled it off even I don’t have my mind right but to her. I was really worried right now, I don’t know if something bad happens to her, but it just a meter deep hole so it wouldn’t make a large damage right? But what if her head hit hard and it damage her brain? AISH!

After the show was end I make my way to the dressing room, I want to go in the hospital to check on her. When I entered my dressing room I found my GF smiling at me. I just stared at her and then she walks towards me and hug me.

“Congratulations Princess, you deserve all the awards you reserve tonight.” She peck my lips

I tried to smile back at her. I went to my things to change my stylist and manager also enters to prepare all my things. When we are all ready, we started to go and my mind still didn’t function well, Yeon was talking and all I do was nodding even I don’t KNOW what she was saying.

The next thing I knew I was in her car already, I realize that she brings her own c