It’s only five in the afternoon and I’m already set to meet Baro. An hour earlier, I decided to do my girl thing. I don’t usually take too much time preparing myself, but then.. something feels different. Not that I’m not used to putting on a little bit make-up, because I do to be honest, I sometime flick a little mascara and put on some lip gloss when I have reporting for some of my subjects.

But right now, I feel like something is not enough. I looked at myself at the mirror, checking for creases on my clothes. I wore a teal sweater jacket paired it with a plain peach low-neck t-shirt and denim jeans, I just chose to wore a simple peach ballerina flats to finish the look.

“Aish~ what is wrong with me.” I said while looking at myself at the mirror. I’ve never really felt this nervous before. I know we’re not going on a date, I’m having dinner with Baro at Ji-Hae’s place. But that thought didn’t make the situation any lighter. I groaned in frustration and walked to my bed, then flopped my body on top of it.

My phone buzzed to notify me that I received a message, when I looked at the time, I noticed that it’s thirty minutes past five. Baro sent a message.

I’m on my way. See you in a bit.

A smiled peaked on my lips after reading his message. He’s going to fetch me from my dorm, and we’re going together to Ji-Hae’s place.. like a real couple. My cheeks flushed red after realizing all my inhibitions.

Ok. I’m already done actually.

In just a few seconds, my phone buzzed again.

Can’t wait to see you, babe.

Oh god! I don’t even know how to respond to that. I fanned my hand on my face as I felt my cheeks burn because of Baro’s last message. A few minutes later after zoning out, I felt my phone buzz beside me.

I’m already here.

My heart started dancing on my chest again, as butterflies burst out of my stomach. I can’t help but to feel a little nervous and excited at the same time. This is so not me. I’ve never felt this way before. I was almost running while I was on my way out of the dorm. I saw Baro leaning his back on the gate. Poor him, good thing it’s summer, he won’t have to freeze himself outside.

“Hey~” I uttered in shyness,

He lift his head up and looked at me, his eyes beamed when he saw me, I’m not really sure what was going on his head, but then he opened his mouth and said, “You look..good.” he said grinning.

My cheeks flush red, “Thanks. Uhm~ you too.” I said after checking his outfit. He was wearing a read polo shirt that was ed all the way down, he had put on a white shirt under it, he had paired it with a black jeans.

He smirked and cockily said, “You just checked me out..” then his smile grew bigger.

“No.. I didn’t~~” I stuttered a bit.

“Denying it won’t work with me, babe..” he said then giving me more playful smile. I rolled my eyes on him because he’s acting too cocky for his own good. He then leaned a little closer to reach for my hand. He pulled me to him. my eyes widened in shock when he leaned his head to the side of my head and whispered to my ear, “I missed you..” then I heard him chuckle.

I took a deep breath when his lips almost touch the sensitive part of my ears, his flirting game is really scaring every bit of my body. I wanted to tell him that I missed him too.. but then, something inside my head is telling me not to. I guess now is not yet the right time.

“Come on..” he said while holding my head grinning.

“uhm~” I tried to come up with something, because I felt like I was floating in the air again as I was looking at our hands, “Where does.. uhm ~ Ji-Hae live?” I trailed off…

He shrugged his shoulders, “10 minutes from here.” He turned his head to look at me, “You don’t mind walking right?”

I grinned at him “No.. I’m used to walking actually..”

He looked over his shoulders and gave me a warm smile. And I don’t know if he noticed the blush on my cheeks after seeing his smile.

Ten minutes later we stopped in front of a building, which I think is a condominium. Ji-hae must’ve been rich because the place looks luxurious. Baro’s apartment was a bit less luxurious, but you can say that someone could’ve spent a fortune to live there. Ji-Hae’s place almost looked like a hotel. We head to the reception area, the receptionist informed us that we can just go straight to the ninth floor where Ji-Hae lives.

 I felt Baro’s grip tighten as we enter the elevator, he must’ve noticed the discomfort expression I was wearing upon entering the place. I’ve never been to a dinner, I don’t know how Ji-Hae would react if she sees me. What if she kicks me out? She can’t be that rude right?

“You’re gonna be okay.” he said without looking but he was smiling while staring at the screen in the elevator which indicates what floor we’re approaching. “trust me..” he mumbled.

I just looked down without saying anything. So, that’s the problem with me. I don’t trust people. Maybe that’s one of my big reasons why I was always alone. I never made friends, I get acquainted to them and I talk to people but that’s it.

We reached a door and Baro knocked on it. A few seconds later, we heard footsteps approaching the door. I was shocked when I saw the door flung open, and Ji-Hae jumped at Baro hugging him tightly.

“Oppa~!” she said giddily, Baro caught her by the waist as if trying to hold her in place, he was also smiling. Something stung my heart, and I just felt like running at that very moment. “I thought you’re not gonna make it again tonight..” Ji-Hae said faking a frown.

Baro smiled at her. And as much as I wanted to move in between them to push them apart. I didn’t do it, I just looked at them, almost tearing up.

“I’m actually here with someone..” Baro said to Ji-Hae who was so busy clinging unto Baro that she didn’t even notice my presence. She stepped down to her feet again when she turned her head to my direction. I just raised my hand and faked a smile.

She was smiling, and I know it wasn’t a genuine one. She actually made me feel like I’m not welcome to the little party they had for Baro. But then I took a deep breath and said, “Hi. How are you Ji-Hae?”

“Hey, Ji-Un~” she said wearing her ever so jolly smile, “Glad you made it too.” And with the look in her eyes, I know she’s lying.

I smiled at her in return, Ji-Hae then turned to Baro and said, “come on.. mom and dad were so excited when I told them you’re coming for dinner.” Ji-Hae pulled Baro by the hand, Baro glanced at me he was supposed to say something but he opted not to say it.. I took a deep breath and just followed them inside. I knew this was a bad idea.

When we got to the house, on the couch were Ji-Hae’s parents watching the news. They turned their attention to us and welcomed us to their place, they then guided us to the kitchen. Baro introduced me to them, which Ji-hae didn’t find amusing. To be honest, this is too rude for her to treat her guest like this. She doesn’t act like this y in school. I don’t even know what’s causing her to make me feel unwanted at that very moment.

I got really jealous about her. She has a family while I never had one, Baro was enjoying his time with her family, he was laughing compared to me there are few times when he’d smile at me.. but he looked really happy with them. They talked a lot about their days when Baro was still in Canada, how they have missed seeing him and Ji-Hae together. The whole dinner made me feel really uncomfortable, I just ignored it and focused on eating. They sure know how to block an outsider out don’t they?

Ok. I never felt this loner as before.

“Ji-Un, so, you’re in drama class with Ji-Hae, right?” Ji-Hae’s father asked while munching his food.

I nodded, “Yes..” I said smiling. I just smiled so I won’t be rude.

“She’s really good!” Ji-hae exclaimed, “Lee-Joon and her had this rare chemistry when they’re together” Ji-Hae muttered in excitement, and I saw Baro’s expression change.

I waved my hands to stop Ji-Hae from furthering with the subject, “Not really..” I lowered down my head while looking at my food.

“Oh dear, you don’t have to be shy about it.” Ji-Hae’s mom said calmly, “chemistry is important for actors and actresses.” She continued smiling.

“Oh.. I’m telling you. You’ll love it when you see Lee-Joon and Ji-Un together.” Ji-Hae giggled, “They’re too cute.”

My brows furrowed. “No we’re not~!” I wanted to scream that ton her face but then I just smiled.

“so, you’re playing as Christine?” ji-hae’s dad smiled at me, “I’m guessing you have a great voice?”

I tried to smile, but before I was able to say anything.

I almost jumped in shock when Baro slammed his spoon on his plate. “She doesn’t. She can’t sing. She has an awful voice.” I’ve never seen him snap like that before, he looked that he could punch someone when I saw the anger in his eyes. And what did he say? I can’t believe he’s doing this to me in front of these people. I can take all the bashing, hatred, and embarrassment from everyone, but I felt like something died inside me after hearing that from Baro.

Everyone was just as shock as I was, no one was talking and no one even tried to say something.

“Baro~” Ji-Hae’s mom calmly called his name as if trying to ease the awkward situation we’re in.

I raised my napkin to clean the sides of my mouth, I stood up and cleared my throat. “I should go..” I said trying not make my voice sound like a squeak as I was trying so hard to hold me tears.

I stormed my way out of the building. Staring down on the ground, trying not to make a scene ‘cause people might notice me crying. I felt my phone buzzing in my pocket as I was walking the sidewalk to my dorm. I already know who was calling my phone because there’s only one person who knows my number… Baro.

I took a deep breath still crying, I did try to hold it in but then I got really emotional upon remembering how everything went at the dinner in Ji-Hae’s place. I felt really jealous towards Ji-Hae, if jealousy could kill. I’d be dead by now.

 I can’t help but to compare myself to her. I never had a family, I never grew up with one. I don’t have everything, I work my off to get what I want, most of the time I just settle for nothing because I just can’t afford some things. She’s had Baro, and I think she’s trying to get back with him.

I can still feel my phone buzzing in my pocket. I know it was rude to just go off and leave that dinner, but then, this is better than crying in front of them. Then I decided to answer the phone because he’s just not going to stop until I answer his calls…

Ji-Un, god! where are you?

His voice sounded like he was concerned and bit panicking when I heard him on the other line.

I don't want to talk right now..

It took me a heard time to let those words out trying to sound normal. But I guess he noticed my sobbing.

Are you crying? Ji-Un? ~ I’m so sorry..

He trailed, and I know he sounded frustrated and pleading, I almost felt like forgiving him at that very moment, but he can’t get away with just a sorry this time. He just stepped on me. Of all people. Baro just said those rude words.

I have to go..

I trailed off and hung up on him.

Ji-Un where are you? Please~ don’t do thi—

I heard him saying a few words on the other line, but I couldn’t care more. He’s done damaging whatever there is left of me. I can always take awful comments from people in campus. I guess three years of practice made me numb. But, hearing those hurtful words from him burned me down. Maybe, Ji-hae and him deserves to be together, they can be insensitive at times.

When I got to my dorm, I never felt more comfortable just lying there. I told myself that I won’t be crying over what happened that night. So, there I was staring at my ceiling like crazy until I drifted off to sleep.

+++

It was Monday morning, and Sunday flew by like a bliss. I worked the whole day, I made myself busy ignoring messages and calls I’ve been receiving from Baro. I know I should’ve given him a chance to explain why he acted so rude the other night. But, I guess I too deserve some time for myself to think. What would I be thinking about in the first place?

I was done for the day, I didn’t see Baro in school, and he did not attend our English and Art class. Wow! Way to go making me feel like I’m the bad guy. I would really love to see him in school and roll my eyes on him and make him feel guilty, but I guess I won’t be doing that today. We’re supposed to visit Dr. Byun, but then things aren’t going so well between us, I guess I’ll have to pass that one out.

I was able to talk to Lee Joon during our English class and he immediately noticed the gloomy expression, I was wearing. “Not feeling a little cheery today? He smirked.”

“I’m not actually in the mood to talk right now.” I mumbled while staring down at my book.

He shrugged his shoulders, “I received a message from Ji-Hae the other night.”

I raised one brow to him, “Why do I care?” I said coldly.

“hey~ I’m just trying to make you feel better.” He said raising his hands up.

Then I snapped back, I’ve got no problem with him, he doesn’t deserve the cold shoulder. “Okay”

“She said you run out after the dinner at their place?” he said as he let out a sigh, “how are you now?”

“oh that?” I took a long pause before saying, “I guess, I really at socializing with people don’t I?”

“It’s not complicated to talk to you.. you know.” He then smirked, “Don’t be so hard on yourself.”

I just shrugged my shoulder hoping not to go deeper to the conversation.

As I was on the hallway approaching the canteen, I heard a crashing sound and people shouting. I’m not really sure what that is, ‘cause I’m not one to care. Then another crashing sound, and I got a little curious because when I passed the canteen I saw some students huddling around something, my eyebrows furrowed, students don’t huddle around unless there’s a fight.

My eyes widened when I saw who are fighting, and they look furious. Furious enough to want to kill each other. It was Baro and Lee-Joon. Baro was beating up Lee-Joon to the ground, Baro looked like he had a good beating from Lee Joon as well because he had a cut on his left cheek. Seeing them that way made my heart pound really hard on my chest, these guys are crazy! How could they make a scene like this in the canteen? They are so unbelievable.

When Baro was about to blow another punch to Lee Joon, I heard Lee Joon mumble, he had a cut on his lower lip, and it’s bleeding.  “You don’t deserve her, dude. You never look at her the way she looks at you.” And with that he received another punch on the face.

I am now very confused. They are fighting about something, duh!, they wouldn’t be beating each other if they’re not fighting about something.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about!” Baro shouted. All the guys in the canteen tried to hold them down, pulling them away from each other.

“Oh yeah~! Look at you! You, of all people know what she’s been through!” Lee joon shouted trying to force the guy who was holding him to let him go. "yet you treat her like a trash!"

“oh yeah!? Don’t talk like you know everything!” Baro shouted back.

“I do!” Lee joon smirked with his broken lip, “Ji-Un likes you.. and you don’t see her that way because you’re too busy  flirting with Ji-Hae unaware that you’re breaking her bit by bit.”

I saw Baro’s eyes widen, I also felt like my eyes bulged out of their socket. So this is about me? They’re fighting/killing each other because of me. I saw Baro’s hand clench into a fist again as he sprinted his way to Lee Joon. I can’t watch them do this anymore. They started beating each other to floor again, I can’t believe a professor or any discipline officer is not here to stop them. I took a pitcher of water from the canteen counter. I stomped my way to them and spilled everything on Baro’s head.

“What the hell!” Baro growled in frustration and lifted his head, his face softened a little when he saw me holding a pitcher while staring down at them.

I saw Lee Joon wipe some of the water from his face as Baro stood up straight to face me. “What’s is wrong with you two?” I scowled. “If you’re planning on killing each other, do it some other place and leave me out of this!” I rubbed my hand on my face in frustration.

“Ji-Un~” Baro said almost pleading, his right cheek is bruised and he had a cut on his left cheek.

“Shut up!” I scowled at him, and that made him stand there dumbfounded.

I ignored Baro. I stared at Lee Joon who had just stood up. I gave him a look, but he tried not to look at me. He looked like he wanted to leave the place because of embarrassment. I can’t blame him, I heard everything. I went to Lee Joon, he was the one who got the most beating, I felt sorry for him though. He’s a good guy, he’s just trying to help. He must be sorry for me after I told him what happened the night at the dinner.

“Are you okay?” I asked Lee Joon

“Come on.. I’ll take you to the clinic.” I mumbled to Lee Joon as I held his elbow and pulled him out of the crowd.

“Ji-Un~” I heard Baro call for me.. I stopped walking and turned to him. He looked defeated, “Please don’t do this.” He said almost pleading.

I wanted to run to him and leave Lee Joon, but I just looked at him hoping that he would understand “I’ll deal with you later.”

And with that, I pulled Lee joon with me to the clinic. I need to talk to him first, I can talk to Baro later. Besides he deserved that because he could’ve done better than beating Lee-Joon. Lee Joon must have hit a spot on Baro, which sparked their fight. They acted so stupid for fighting like two little boys.

“I’m sorry..” my brows furrowed at Lee Joon when I heard him say that, he’s not seating on one of the cots in the clinic, the nurse is now cleaning his wounds.

“What happened?” I said calmly, I just need to know.

“I provoked him.” he mumbled

“What do you mean?” I said, becoming more confused with his words.

“I told him that if he’s not going to make a move on you.. then I’ll pursue you.” He let out a small smile.

“WHAT~!?” I almost shouted the word.

“I didn’t know he’ll get that angry..” he said scrunching his noise. “this will leave scar. You have to treat me for ice cream.”

“now? You’re blaming it on me?” I chuckled. “he deserves the punches though” I admitted.

Something in my heart felt warm knowing that Baro might have been jealous and angry because Lee Joon said he’s going to make a move on me. Baro must have been furious. I still have the whole afternoon to talk to him, and fix this matter. Once and for all.