Day 15 : Waste

What the hell. My life was just getting better, and this happened? Jung Ilhoon, this was not the person I thought you were. What happened to the Ilhoon that helped me lose weight? Because of him, I’ve almost gotten to lose so much weight. Yeah, I still look pretty much “fat,” but I’ve grown much more confidence.
 

I don’t even know why, but I just kept wishing, “Please… Chase after me and explain yourself.” I kept telling myself not to turn around, but I did; a few times. Still, nothing. It was an empty sidewalk with no one trailing behind me. I looked down to the ground and kicked around a bottle cap, not knowing where I was walking. I knew it was too good to be true. Him, my life and my dreams. It was all rushing down too fast. It was too hard not to think about it, but I’d have to it up for tomorrow. I didn’t want my dad to see me like this.
-
 

I returned from the bathroom, once again. I didn’t know what was wrong with me! I just knew I had a huge stomachache. I walked over to a table that had two cups of coffee on the table; I swore this is where we sat, but Yun wasn’t there. My eyes scoped the whole café; still no sign of her. Maybe she went to the bathroom. I took a seat where I had sat before and sipped the last drops of my coffee.
 

She was taking a really long time. 5 minutes, maybe? It was probably the coffee that we ordered that was giving us the stomachaches! I got really bored waiting for her, so I decided to play on my phone until she got back. It kinda bothered me why Minhyun hadn’t texted me back. I clicked on my messages to see if my message hadn’t sent or something.
 

Hmm? It say’s I’ve already read it… I sat there thinking… Yun! I jumped off my seat and ran out the door. She was long gone by now. I sighed and gripped tightly on my phone. Yun… I don’t mean what I said. I don’t even know why I said it. Please, let me explain myself. I begged repeatedly to the imaginary Yun in my head.
 

It was probably the stupidest decision to make, but I decided not to go to Yun’s house to clear it up. I wanted to give her some time to push off all that steam. Instead, I headed to the dance studio to meet up with my crew. We were practicing hardcore for our upcoming Global Dance Competition. Winning crew would get a free trip to New York to perform in front of millions! This was a really big opportunity for us to become big after high school.
 

While walking to the studio, I thought a little bit about meeting Yun’s dad. I’ve heard stories about him from time to time about Yun and where’s he’s been this whole time, but I don’t think it’s a good idea to go there tomorrow; besides, her step mom already hates my guts. I sorta brushed it off once I got into the studio.
-
 

I got home, still staying strong. My eyes were filled with both anger and disappointment, but once I got home it was like nothing had happened at all. Everyone greeted me, as always, step mother was yelling at me, like always. “Clean, clean, clean! Appa’s coming home tomorrow first thing in the morning!” I sighed tiredly. I almost forgot Dad was coming home tomorrow. I lazily went down to the living room and got to cleaning.
 

Once the house was completely clean I went up to my room and checked my phone. Wow, Jung Ilhoon. Impressive. No texts or calls whatsoever. I thought you were better than this. I turned my phone off and chucked it into the open closet. It was late, so I decided to sleep away this disastrous day; though it wouldn’t really go away. I was definitely skipping school tomorrow.
-
 

After practice I waved goodbye to everyone before going in the other direction. I planned on going out with them to celebrate such a successful practice, but I really wanted to clear things up with Yun. Knowing Yun for almost half the year, it wasn’t going to be easy. With just this simple text, I’ve hurt her millions.  
 

I paced back forth in front of the gate of her house repeatedly. I wanted to see her so badly; to have less chances of losing her. I had no guts to actually go in, so I called her. The whole “throwing pebbles at your bedroom window” was lame. She didn’t pick up after 10 calls. She really was ignoring me. I texted her instead and walked home before curfew.
 

I took a cold shower and thought about what I had done to her today. It’s amazing how taking a shower can make you think about so many things. Thinking it over, I’d actually hate myself too. Tomorrow, I thought. Tomorrow I’ll go straight up to her and ask her to take me back and introduce myself to her family as her boyfriend.
 

I lied in bed, rethinking my whole plan for tomorrow. This got me thinking about other things, as well. Did I like Yun that much to go after her for real? Yes. I do like Yun. I have since the day I met her; I just didn’t realize it. Her determination and confidence caught my attention. Yeah, at first talking to her was for the bet, but then I got to know her. I wasn’t talking to “Yun, the fat chick.” I was talking to “Yun, the amazing girl I’ve been head over heels for.”
 

Next Day
 

I woke up bright and early, dressing up as nicely as I could. I slowly walked downstairs, waiting to be scolded by my step mom. All the kids were already on their way to school while I was ninjaing my way into the kitchen. “Park Yun!” I cringed as I was slowly opening the fridge. “Why’re you still here? You should be at school! Your Appa will be so disappointed if he comes here, finding you here and not at school working on your studies!” She sighed and placed a hand on her hip, sending death daggers at me through her eyes. “It’s just one day, sheesh! Can’t I skip school for one day to see the only real family I’ve got left?” I slammed the fridge shut and walked pass her, going into the living room.
 

Up until noon, I realized my phone was still in the closet. I got up and walked up to my room, searching for my phone in the huge pile of clothes that I don’t even wear. I turned it one, finding it being completely with Ilhoon’s name all over the screen. Wow, 10 calls and a text. Why didn’t he just come over? Thinking about it, I wouldn’t have answered anyway. I gulped, what felt like a stone in my throat, as I slowly opened the text. I slowly skimmed it, reading it from word to word.

Yun, I’m sorry. This probably already sounds pathetic, being started with an apology. You probably know what I’m going to say anyway, so why would I waste my time typing it all down? Besides, I think it’d be better if we spoke in person. Give me a chance to explain things. That text you saw; let me explain everything. Please. I’m dying to see you, literally. Give me a call.
 

Psh. Whatever. I placed my phone faced down onto my desk and walked out of my room, shutting the door behind me.
 

The door bell rang, my heart stopped and I couldn’t move my feet. It could be Ilhoon, but could also be my dad. I slowly walked down the stairs and slowly opened the door. The rim of my eyes were immediately filled with tears as I threw my arms over the tall man. “Appa! I missed you so much!” I cried uncontrollably at the sight of my dad right in front of me. I couldn’t remember the last time I hugged him or talked to him; I felt safe in his arms. “Aigoo! My little Yun’s all grown up!” He hugged me tightly as he the back of my head.
 

My step mom brought us both down to the living room to have some afternoon tea and lunch. Dad told us all about how it’s like in the States. His English is very fluent, as well.
The kids soon came home from school and gave our dad the same greeting I gave him earlier. He then pulled out many gifts he had brought with him. The girls got new hand bags, my little brother got a toy that’s only sold in the States, and I got a new pair of shoes along with a necklace with my name on it.
 

While everyone was settling down after getting all their gifts and hugs from Dad, the door bell rang. I raised a brow and got up from sitting on the couch. “Oh, it’s probably the chicken! I asked for delivery. Grab the check on the table.” I nodded and followed my step mom’s orders, grabbing the check off the table and opened the door. “Kamsamnida! Here’s your—“ I froze and stared at the chicken-less person in front of me. “W-Why’re you here…” “Yun-ah! What’s taking you so long?” I turned my head and yelled back. “A-Ah! Mian, it’s not the chicken guy.” “Bwoh? Who is it then?” “Just some—“ Ilhoon barged his way in and yelled out,” Yun’s namja chingu!” I nearly stumbled down the stairs. “YAH! Get out of my—“ “Yun-ah.. You never told me you had a boyfriend?” My dad was already up the steps and face to face with Ilhoon. Ilhoon cleared his throat. “Annyeonghaseyo. Ilhoon imnida.” He then bowed at a perfect 90 degree angle. My dad then led us both downstairs.
-
 

I huffed as I impatiently waited for Yun in front of the school gates. I repeatedly checked my watch; 5 minutes later to 30 minutes later than when she usually gets to school. Then, the bell rang for first hour. I sighed and headed to my class.
 

Lunch time came around which caused me to look for Yun all over the place. “Ayye, Ilhoon! What’s up? You’ve been out of it all day.” I shook my crew mate, Sungjae’s, hand off my shoulder. “I’m looking for Yun.” Sungjae choked on his spit and gave me this disgusted face. “And why would you be looking for her? Minhyun Hyung told us you weren’t seeing her anyway.” I looked Sungjae straight in the eyes. “This isn’t all a game anymore. I like Yun, for real this time. I’ve always liked her. I just didn’t want to admit it til now. But now I’m not the slightest of embarrassed to admit that I like her.” I ran off from Sungjae’s sight and ran as fast as I could to Yun’s house.
 

Before knocking on her door, I caught my breath and pulled myself together. Make this playful, not serious. Luckily, she opened it, probably thinking I was some delivery guy, and didn’t shut it. I barged my way in and politely introduced myself to the unfamiliar face.
 

I sat beside her in front of both her parents. I felt like I was in those Kdramas where the parents discuss about your relationship or something. I absolutely felt the immense tension from her step mom, but her dad didn’t look all that scary. “So, you’re Yun’s namja chingu?” Before I could say anything, Yun blurted out, “Ani. He’s just some kid that likes to fool around with me.” She didn’t make any eye contact with me at all. I faced her. “Is this your way of breaking up with me without actually saying it to my face?” Yun scoffed. “You’re the one that messed up.” Both her parents looked confused. “What’s this all about, Ilhoon-ssi?” I bowed apologetically. “Mian, Mr.Park.” I stood up and fixed my clothes a bit then cleared my throat. “I like your daughter, a lot.” I look towards Yun whom had her eyes widened. “What’re you talking about? No you don’t! The bet and everything. Our whole friendship and relationship was fake.” Her parents kinda just stood there and watched us.
 

I faced her and her parents. “Listen to what I have to say—“ “And why would I want to—“ “Sh, Yun ah. Listen to what this young man has to say.” Her dad smiled at me encouragingly. I then started to say what I had all clamped up in my head.
 

“Yes, before it was a bet. When I first approached you was the first thing I had to do. The part about helping you lose weight was part of it, too. But what wasn’t part of it was entering the dance competition with you. I made that decision myself. I could see the amount of confidence you had and I wanted to dance with you to show others what you were hiding. But that didn’t really change how people thought about your appearance. Next was getting you to like me. I honestly liked how our friendship was already going, but knowing that was the last thing I had to do really pressured me. I knew that if I didn’t really like you in that way I had to force myself to do such a thing and then throwing it off would hurt you. But I was selfish and did it anyway, and I’m sorry for doing it. After thinking about it last night, I realized I really do like you. The time I hugged you, held your hand and kissed you were all by choice; I wanted to do those things to you. If I could go back, I’d take back being the crew leader because I’d rather be with you, Yun. I like you and I mean it this time.”   

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