We were walking back home.Tao offered to walk with me but I refused. I didn't want him to suffer or be lonely here with me just cause I was upset. I told the others I need some time alone, so they walked ahead of me.
Step after step after step. It was painful to walk ahead when I wanted to stay behind. No wait, I didn't want to stay behind but I'm stuck with all the reality that I'm dealing with. I felt lost in my own little world. All alone with no one else, except this someone. Someone who is pulling me down deeper. It's like I'm under my own grave, buried alive. And the demons under the ground are pulling me down. I want to come back up to the surface, but I can't.
My inside's are burning up. My mind, it keeps thinking back in the past. My childhood, when I met Chen, and just last week.
It was during lunch. Everyone was outside. I was walking around when I saw Chen talking to some girl. He was perfectly normal. It was like nothing happened. It was like nothing happened between us. It was like he just forgot about me and he started off anew. He was just probably talking to the girl. It's not a crime to talk to someone who was the opposite of you and when you're already taken.But still, it didn't feel right. It was like my insides were exploding. I couldn't help but feel jealous. Jealousy took over.
I kept on walking and I felt something on my hand. Like some one grabbed it. I turned to see who it was.
"Why were you with Tao?" he asked coldly.
I didn't answer. I was afraid if I answer his question it might come out the wrong way.
"On the Go-Carts. On the Ferris Wheel. When you grabbed his arm. When you leaned on him. When you grabbed his hand when he held it out to you. Do you think I didn't see."