I couldn't help but smile on what just happened today. He definitely made my day. He knew how to make me happy and feel special given only the few hours we spent together.

 I suddenly went back to reality when I again remembered Youngbae. He can't blame me for being like this. Where was he during those times I simply needed someone to talk to? Or was I just mocking myself out of guilt and shame. I allowed myself to walk freely inside elevator. I pressed the button to the floor where I live. I then opened my back and searched for my keys. Okay, here it is. I inserted the key when I felt that it was open already.

I slowly peered inside. The lights are off, that's weird. I walked inside and immediately got something sharp from my bag. Who could it possibly be? I crawled my way inside and searched for the switch. Found it! I the switch and was surprised to see someone unexpected. I caught Youngbae sleeping soundly on one side of the couch and in bad shape. I paced myself to him. As I was about 12 inches away, I smelled something weird. He's DRUNK!

I poked him on his side, he didn't move so I slightly caressed his face, I felt sorry. As in literally sorry. He couldn't barely move and open an eye when I finally sat beside him and gave him one last poke in his ears. He then got up, he looked so weak I helped him sit down. With that, he then hugged me, tight. Tears slowly trickled down his face. "Love, where the hell we're you? I was so damn worried, I thought we had this conversa...." I cut him off this time so he couldn't bring up the topic of our supposedly 'talk' and make me feel gulity, "I had an emergency to attend to, Sorry wasn't able to tell you asap." and looked away from him. I can see from the corner of my eyes that he was looking really hard on me. His stare, no matter how drunk he was, always was cute.

"No, seriously love, I think I have the right to know what really is going on," He said and grabbed my chin so that I looked at him. "Bae, you've drank too much, your not in your right state of mind." I replied. Tears continue to fall down from his face. "It's unfair!" His voice grew loud this time, "I've been honest to you all this time and this is how you treat me? like a 7 year old? I'm not a kid and your not my mother, so better speak up now or I'll find the answer myself!" he grumbled in anger. This time, I felt pain in his heart. I can't see him crying like this.

I breathed heavily. "okay, i'm sorry, i've been acting strange lately, I admit," He then looked at me, wiped his tears and said "then what?! don't keep waiting! He demanded. "hold your horses bae! I don't think this is the right time for this, your drunk and it's not gonna work." I repied "What's not gonna work huh?! US?! f***!" He then stood up, sober but still managed to compose himself. "what's wrong with you?! aren't you satisfied with me?! what now, you think you can fool me?! I DONT DESERVE ANY OF THIS!" he shouts and starts walking around the living room.

I, too, was crying. I couldn't help tears stream down my face. I cut him off again this time I stood up and followed where he was, "I'm sorry! I know this was my fault, I should've done this..." tears continue to flow. He then turned his back the moment he heard me talk. "Tell me, who's this guy your seeing? I'm not numb, in fact I already have someone in my mind right now," He said as he walked to where I stood up. "Its, it...its.. Seu..." He cut me off "I thought so." He replied in his casual not in the mood voice.

"It hurts, it hurts alot, I told you, you can never fool me," he says looking in great frustration at me. I was so embarassed to look at him. "You know how painful that feels? you and my friend? It's like stabbing my back with 2 gigantic samurai swords!" he said. "I'm really sorry," I muttered, "I love you Bae, but I have to be honest with you this time, those moments I needed you the most, He was there to cheer me up, you wouldn't know this cos you were so focused with your work, I'm not comparing but though in your busy schedules he efforted in texting me, he was the one I asked for updates on how you've been doing etc." I said and sat back in the couch. I can't look at him right now. I was having mix emotions.

After I had the privilege of saying how I am exactly feeling at the moment, he was still there, stuck all by himself. After a few minutes of complete silence, he finally spoke. "Well, I'm sorry, I guess I have been realy too focused lately I thought you understood that, I was wrong. I love you soo much I'l do what it takes..." He said. I was caught dumbfounded. Whew. Sigh of relief. "Well, I love you too. But I don't know how much this is gonna cost our relatinoship." I replied and looked back at him.

"For whatever it takes, I'm willing to take a risk." He said. "Wait, what about Seungri now," I asked in confusiuon. "Can we not talk about him for a minute?" He replied. "okay. i'm really sorry. for real." I replied. "Thanks for being honest, that's one of the traits why I fell for you. Your concern for everyone." he said.

*well, how'd this chapter go? i wonder where this would lead to.. hmmm... hahahah! :) thanks for all the comments, thanksss once again :)