Finally, it is my birthday today. I have been looking forward to this day dahil makakapag-relax na rin ako with my family and friends. I invited my best friends, and Winter and Ning for an overnight swimming party here sa bahay namin. After ng Friday classes ko, dumiretso na ako ng uwi dito sa Mandaluyong so I can help prepare for my birthday party.

I am also kind of dreading this day kasi I am turning a year older. I don’t want to grow old so fast. I don’t even know what I want to do yet after graduating. I am not ready for adult responsibilities. It’s hard kasi on one hand, I want to help my parents already, pero how could I when I don’t even know what career path I should take after studying?

As soon as nag-midnight, mom, dad, and ate Charing surprised me in my room with a cake. Ate Irene joined us through video call, and she said sorry dahil hindi siya makakauwi this year. Nag-picture taking lang kami, and nag-blow lang ako ng candles. My wish? Sana malaman ko na what I want to do soon. Naiinggit kasi ako sa friends ko whenever they talk about their future plans. I want to have that vision too. Everybody’s telling me to take my time, and madidiscover ko rin kung ano ang gusto kong gawin, but I fear that I am running out of time already. Soon I’ll be in my 3rd year na sa UP, and half na ‘yun ng college life. If I still don’t figure things out, hindi ko na lang alam saan ako pupulutin after graduation.

Anyway, my friends greeted me rin kaagad sa group chat namin. It’s like this naman every year. Laging exactly 12:00 a.m., nagsesend na sila ng birthday wishes nila for me, and I appreciate them so much. The only difference is that this year, I have 2 new friends na nag-greet din sakin on the dot. It’s Winter and Ning.

I am really glad na nakilala ko silang dalawa. No exaggeration but every moment I spend with them, I swear to god, I am just always laughing. I feel this naman with my best friends too, but hindi na kasi match schedules namin unlike before. So I have been spending more time with Winter, and sometimes, Ning tags along.

At first, I was worried about hanging out with the two of them. They’re childhood friends, and you know, it’s kind of awkward to hang with two best friends while you’re just a new friend to them. But they made me feel welcome, and they always make sure na hindi ako ma-OP sa kanilang dalawa. I really adore their friendship too. I can tell na they really care for each other, even though ang hilig nila na paluin ang isa’t isa. Their friendship is too precious.

So today, medyo maaga dumating ‘yung best friends ko. Giselle was the first person to come, because tuwing birthday party ko, she helps with the preparations. She also brought alcohol, soju and beer, since sabi niya a party is not complete without drinks. We’re not excessive drinkers naman. Just enough to have fun. Around 4 p.m., sunod-sunod na dumating sila Chaehyun, Lia, Yeji, and Ryujin. Yuna can’t come today since she is busy with school. I can treat her some other time naman. I understand since Grade 12 na siya, and that’s the hardest part of high school.

“Did you invite Winter pala?” Gigi asked me.

“Of course I did. I also invited her best friend, Ning,” I answered.

I noticed that Ryujin stiffened at the mention of Winter’s name. Maybe she’s worried since they are still not talking.

While waiting for the food to be ready, nag-uusap lang friends ko about mostly school stuff. It’s been a while since we gathered like this kasi, so we are just catching up.

I looked at the time, and it’s 5 p.m. but Winter and Ning are still not here. I don’t want to be negative, but what if nagbago isip ni Winter? What if ayaw niya na pala pumunta because nandito ‘yung dalawang inaavoid niya? But Winter promised me that she will come, and I know she is not the type to break her promises.

“Birthday na birthday mo nakasimangot ka. Do you want to talk about it?” Lia told me.

“It’s nothing,” I answered.

“Sure?”

“Yeah,” I assured her. “Wait for me, I will just get my phone sa room ko,” paalam ko sa friends ko, and they just nodded at me.

I charged my phone kasi kanina sa room ko kaya I left it upstairs, and I wanted to check if may message ba si Winter. If she is really not coming, I know that she will at least text to inform me.

May nag-notify naman kaagad sa phone ko when I picked it up. It’s a message from Winter.

Winter [5:37 p.m.]: karina, dito na kami ni ning sa labas ng tinuturo ng waze

I let out a sigh of relief. I was nervous kasi bago ko i-open ‘yung message. I thought she was going to let me know na hindi siya makakapunta.

I checked from my room’s window, and natatanaw ko na ‘yung familiar gray BMW.

Karina [5:38 p.m.]: oh i can see your car sa window na. i'll go down and help open the gate para makapark ka sa loob

As soon as I hit send, I excitedly went downstairs para tumulong mag-bukas ng gate for Winter and Ning.

“What happened? Complete opposite na ng expression mo kanina ‘yung saya mo ngayon,” Chaehyun said.

“Nothing.” Well, Winter is here. “Wait for me again. I will just help ate Charing open the gate. Nandyan na sila Winter and Ning.”

I didn't even wait for my friends to respond, and lumabas na ako kaagad ng bahay. I assisted ate Charing sa pagbubukas ng gate, and Winter rolled down her car’s window to greet me before she parked her car. Ning also greeted me after nila bumaba sa sasakyan. I invited them to come inside our house na.

Guilt immediately ate me pagkapasok nila Winter sa house. Nag-hi siya sa friends namin, and I introduced them ni Ning, but na-sense ko agad ‘yung pagiging uncomfortable ni Winter when she saw Ryujin and Yeji. I just hope these two tone down their PDA for today.

My mom checked on us after cooking, and she asked me to help set the table. I didn’t want to go because I wanted to talk to Winter to distract her from Ryujin and Yeji, but I just went since mabilis lang naman mag-ayos ng table. I did it extra fast this time.

I was surprised when I saw Winter and my dad talking pagkabalik ko sa sala. Hindi ko alam na they knew each other pala. Winter’s father was one of my dad’s patients. Talk about coincidences.

All throughout dinner, I can’t help but look at Winter every now and then. I am just worried, but it looks like she’s fine. She’s engaging in small talks with my friends, and Ning immediately vibed with them din naman. Winter is also eating more than usual tonight, and it’s cute. Minsan ko lang kasi siya makita na mag-enjoy while eating.

I must have been staring at her an awful lot dahil napansin ko agad noong kumunot ‘yung noo niya. I followed her line of sight, and it was Ryujin and Yeji flirting. As much as I wanted to ask them to tone it down, that would be awkward. It’s a party, and I don’t want to ruin the mood. Winter immediately looked somewhere else, and her eyes landed on me. I took it as an opportunity to ask if she is okay, and she nodded at me. I know you’re not. I’m sorry.

Chaehyun noticed the girlfriends too and teased them. I looked at Winter again, and I saw her and Ning whispering something to each other. Sila Ryujin and Yeji naman tinignan ko, and Ryujin seemed down. I hope she becomes more mindful of their PDA.

Since kanina pa naman kami tapos mag-dinner, I invited my friends to swim na.

My friends are already playing sa swimming pool, and I noticed na nasa gilid lang si Winter. Why isn’t she joining them? I decided na lang na lapitan siya, and I challenged her for a race since I wanted to distract her. I don