By the time Jongin had finished his picture, it's already his third week being at the arts club. Although he's still annoyed to s with all the stupid ogle-eyes that admire him like he's some sort of half-God, he's actually taken a liking to it.

Not least because of Lay, who made it a lot easier for Jongin to blend in smoothly.

Right from the start he has made every effort to clear the path for his new friend and soon, despite hating that stupid bunch, he was included, accepted, something that was actually strangely new to Jongin.

Sure he's popular with many guys around high school, but boy he gets tired of playing cool all the time as well.

Being here with a crowd of very distinct individuals had Jongin realize quickly that he wasn't the only one with a package of problems and buggers.

Especially today, where a discussion about the artworks is held, Jongin can't help but secretly gawk at the other pictures while listening to the intentions and emotions fueling them.

He learned that Lay had lost his mother last year due to a very aggressive form of cancer that tortured her body and mind until the very end.

A very strong motive, that's also clearly evident in his picture although not as obvious as Jongins.

„Thanks for sharing this with us Lay. You know this means a lot.“

Sehun smiles compassionately at Lay as he sits in his chair comfortably. Lay smiles back sheepishly, looking down as he did shyly.

„Who wants next?“ Sehun looked around with curious eyes. Several students look at each other, silently matching out who'd be next.

Then a petite girl suddenly raises a slender hand.

„I'll do it.“ Her soft voice matched her doll-like appearance perfectly.

She carried her canvas to the framework, looking into assuring faces as he glanced around a bit nervous.

Jongin actually finds her quite cute, wondering what'd cause despair for such a little bumblebee.

As she explains, Jongin catches some scraps being about ual abuse and the likes.

He frowns slightly.

How could such a young girl like her already experience such a cruel action? She looks so innocent, so fragile. Jongin fights the urge to wanting to hug her, as some tears stream down her face in the middle of her explanation. He frowns harder.

This really shouldn't be. It was cruel and above all it made Jongin feel like crap out of sudden.

He looked down on his shoes to avoid the girl infront any farther. As she ends, a few girls welcome

her into a warm hug and Sehun looks quite affected himself.

„I'm sorry Hani. That must've been very difficult for you. Thank you for still sharing it with us.“ The familiar compassionate smile appeares on his lips again before the next student has to volunteer.

Jongin glances around imapssively, catching Sehuns look in the process. Before he could turn away with embarassement, Sehun nods at him encouragingly, giving him a small smile.

„Jongin, what about you?“, he then asks as no one seems to be wanting to continue.

Jongin stiffens, not really prepared to explain his picture just now. His mouth opens to protest against the suggestion but several other students break out in affirmative murmuring, practically urging Jongin to present his work.

He sighs defeated and gets up to place his picture infront.

He really doesn't want to share his personal story with everyone, especially not Sehun. They don't need to know about his circumstances although it just seemes to be fair, regarding the honesty everyone has put into this discussion already.

Another inaudible sigh slips past his lips. He glances around quickly, biting his lower lip.

Sehun seems to catch on Jongins unease quickly and places an assuring hand on his back.

Jongin flinches at the sudden touch, turning around to look into those oh so dark eyes.

„It's ok Jongin, things're not gonna leave the room“, he takes a look at the excited class, „Right?“ Everyone nods in agreement, eager to take a look at Jongins picture.

„Alright“, Jongin ruffles his hair as some sort of distraction before examining his artwork briefly. It shows exactly what he had planned it to be. Dark, void, heavy.

A wash of satisfaction mixes with the eery atmosphere of the picture and Jongin turns to the class opening his mouth as if to say something but he falls silent again.

„ … I don't really know how to explain this one.“ He scratches his neck with a sheepish smile, „Everyone's so much better at this stuff than I am.“ He witnesses the coy smiles creeping up onto some lips and he regrets saying what he just said now.

Damn he doens't wanna compliment that bunch for being weird.

But honestly he can't remember the last time he had to reveal something personal other than to Baekhyun.

„It's ok Jongin, take your time.“ Sehun smiles calmly, an excited glint still evident in his eyes. He wants to hear Jongin out as much as the others want to.

Because Jongin never really revealed personal stuff about him, everyone eventually made up stories that extended to the wildest imagiantions.

The only thing that was clearly evident was his smooth facade as well as his bad boyish behavior which, as something itself sparked many rumors and stories on the go and slowly built up the image of the unapproachable troublemaker with the irresistable charm.

To get a piece of privacy now was worth more than gold.

Eager eyes stared up at him in anticipation and Jongin slightly squirmes under the pressure that's put upon him.

„Well …“, he starts in a murmur, shifting uncomfortably, „I … It's something quite personal and …“, he suddenly remembers the tiny girl that openly shared her story about ual abuse and he suddenly feels a rush of guilt shooting through his veins painfully.

What a jerk he must be to let all these people down that shared the most intimate stories about their personal life which most often was devastating.

„You know, pain makes the best artists“, Sehuns voice ghosts through his head and he glances around another time, looking into the faces infront of him once more.

It is, as if something had changed just the split second. He suddenly imagined all the tragic fates they shared and how bravely they talked about it.

Now he is deeply disgusted with the cowardice clawing into his back. He's no better than any of those oogle-eyes and his story isn't any worse and not worth sharing.

„Alright“, he finally sighs, taking a deep breath. He straightens his back, faintly gesturing at his picture.

„Well you know this is actually about a family member …“ And so he begins to tell the whole story of his father dying as he was still little, his mother marrying another man that turned out to be not only a drunkard but also a wife-batterer that abused him and his mother on a regular basis when he was drunk.

He shared the story of him coming home finding his mother sprawled out on the table completely trashed and fast asleep. He shares the emotions he felt that moment, the disappointment, the hurt, the rage.

He shared the raging fit and the way his mother mumbled incoherently while he violently shook her to wake up.

His heartbeat doubles up at the painful memory and he has to bite back the lump that slowly forms in his throat while talking about everything.

„And … that's basically my definition of despair“, he concludes, finally looking up after the whole time staring at the blank wall behind the students or the ground.

A deep blush paints his cheeks as he stares into astounded eyes staring back at him.

The whole room had fallen into an eery silence ever since Jongin started and stopped talking.

He notices the persistent silence with discomfort and nervously taps on his feet while looking elsewhere but into the round of students.

He just knew this was gonna be the reaction.

The allmighty troublemaker was just a weak boy after all. Now his reputation is gonna be ruined for lifetime, he thinks bitterly, frowning at the thought of him being pitied by everyone that comes to know his true story.

Oh how he just wishes to turn back the time to share only half of it, although this would've been more than enough as well.

He just wishes someone would finally say something instead of staring at him thunderstruck.

„Well … thanks for listening. Imma sit down.“, Jongin finally mumbles under his breath and quickly snatches his canvas down the wooden easel.

Then, finally, he notices the familiar deep, husky voice speaking up: „Thanks very much Jongin. I know this wasn't easy for you at all but I'm glad you still shared all this with us. Imma make sure it stays inside the room.“

He shoots a pointed look at his students quickly. „You heard me. If I come to notice someone was in need for gossip I'll immediately put up consequences, got it? Same goes for everyone. What's been shared here is extremely private and I don't want anyone to take those sensitive information and trust everyone put into this group outside this room ok?“

Everyone hastily nods at Sehuns sharp words and Jongin feels some kind of ease slowly sinking in. He doens't really want to be allies with this bunch of weirdos but rather than being exposed to the whole school, he accepted the agreement that's made inside this room.

As time goes on, Jongin doesn't really pay much attention to the presentaion of the remaining pictures.

He secretly fumbles with his phone, playing some random games.

To be honest he doesn't really care about the rest that much. Lay and the cute girl that went before were kind of interesting to listen to or at least to look at but now that the lesson proceeds Jongin slowly gets tired of all the tragedy lingering inside the room like a heavy veil weighing down everyones mood.

Jongin can't stand the aura of depression that slowly creeps up at him, yanking on this shirt already. So he quickly got himself a distraction to shut out the heavy emotions.

As the club ends and everyone slowly shuffles out the room, Sehun calls up Jongin, slightly startling him with the sudden attention.

„Jongin do you have a moment?“

Actually yes but given the current circumstances, he'd rather choose not to spend time with Sehun alone. But he couldn't say that to his teacher, although he had said way worse than that before.

A deep flush reddens his face as the memory crashes back into his head. He hastily shakes it off before answering as calm as possible: „Well just I guess I can spare a minute.“

Sehuns lips curl up into a genuine smile and he leans against the table infront of the class. Jongin joins him opposite.

„What is it you want to talk about?“

Sehun catches Jongins eyes, staring at them deeply for a long moment. Jongins breathing slowly stops at the intensity those dark orbs hold.

He averts his gaze awkwardly.

„Thank you for sharing your story with us today.“

„You told me in class already“, Jongin points out, a bit surprised at Sehuns words.

„I know, but I wanted to give you a genuine thanks. I know how hard this must've been. Given the fact that you'd never shared a piece of information infront of no one.“

Jongin still refuses to look up. He didn't really know what to say.

„W-Well it was nothing, really. I mean- … everyone shared their bits and stories so I didn't wanna … let them down I guess.“

He nervously fumbles with his hands, the awkwardness clearly evident.

But Sehun only smiles softly, putting a hand on Jongins shoulder, who is startled by the friendly gesture.

„Whatever the reason was, I'm glad you did.“ His gaze lowers, as if contemplating something.

„You know …“, he starts kind of uneasy and Jongin slightly panicked. There it was, Karma biting back another time. Sehun would finally skip the professionalism and get right into the girl talk.

Jongin really doesn't want to discuss the juicy details of the stupid dare from this stupid evening.

Mentally, a thousand of nearly coherent excuses flood his mind and he frantically searches for the best one as Sehun continues to speak: „I know we're quite different. Not only in terms of teacher and student.“

Was this the stupid proposal of the yucky Baekhyun mentioned? Jongin stared at the ground hard, imagining what to come next as this was more than surreal to him already.

„But I assume we're not that different after all.“ What about this whole getting personal stuff Sehun just pulled?! What was the whole point in this sy peptalk at all?

„You know I'm passionate about arts as well, obviously.“ A sly grin appeared on Sehuns lips, Jongin blushes even harder.

„And I could've visited the most prestigious universities in and out the country. My parents are rich and I grew up with all the pampering they could give me. I was their only child after all.“

„And what's the point in you telling me all this?“, Jongin finally spoke up, confused to the bone.

„Well you know, they agreed with me to study arts and become a teacher. And they were happy for me to be able to enter basically any university or college I want, considering my grades and insisted on paying the tuition.“

He his head to catch a better glimpse at Jongin, who still looks down in confusion, his brows furrowed.

„You know what I did?“

Jongin looks up, a questioning and slightly awkward look in his eyes. He shifts uncomfortably, immediately looking away.

„You … accepted it?“, he points out the obvious but Sehun just shakes his head with a deep chuckle.

„Hell no. I worked my young off to get into a scholarship-programm they offered back then. I didn't want the money although it would've been the easy way. No I felt guilty taking it, I didn't wanna be dependant on someone, especially not my parents as I was on the verge of adulting anyway.“

„How … stupid“, it accidently slips past Jongins lips and he dashes his hands over his mouth to cover it quickly.

„I-I'm so sorry I- I didn't mean to-“

Sehun waves it off nonchalantly, cutting out Jongins stuttering.

„That's what I got a lot. Of course everyone would've taken the easy road and I don't mind them at all. If things had been differently maybe I would've accepted their offer.“ He stares out of the window with a thoughtful expression covering his face.

Jongin wonderes what he means by saying 'if things had been differently'. But he has no time to ponder as Sehun shakes his head and continues: „The point in all that blabbering is Jongin, you are an awesome talent and it'd be a waste to throw it away. I know you're situation is more than difficult but let me assure you, I want to help.“

He stares deeply into Jongins eyes as he sais the words with genuine sincerity. As the intensity of Sehuns look doens't subside, Jongin quickly looks down again to his fumbling hands.

He is more than bothered by a person worrying so much about him, yeah, actually believing in him. It fills Jongin with nothing but rejection and disgust and his insides bristle at the stuff Sehun just said.

With a deep, angry frown, Jongin looks up again.

„I don't need your help“, he spits low, his eyes mere narrow slits „I don't need anyones help. Y'all think you need to pity me? Wrong! I don't want your damn pity or your freackin' help! Believe me I can handle my own perfectly well. Spare that cutsie-concern for the ones who need it.“

He turns on his heels and storms out of the room, leaving a flabbegasted Sehun behind.

Hello my little cuppie cakes ^_^ Hope you're doing well and missed me? ;D Ok jokes aside :)

I apologize for not updating as always but I was quite busy last few weeks :( Bear with me I'll try to write a bit more next weeks so stay tuned ;)

Hope you all enjoy this chappie and as always big big thanks to all the new subbies and everyone who upvoted this story it means a lot to me <3

Have a great week sweetheart ;) Love you