A couple of days later, it's the last day before summer holidays.

Jongin lazily shuffles through the door of the arts club classroom, not being present at all.

His thoughts still drift away to his mother and her filthy scumbag of a husband.

His insides still cramp with the agonizing feeling of guilt and distress facing the current situation.

He let's out an exhausted sigh.

This just couldn't be happening, not when he had just assumed that his life started to be a little easier and smooth.

„What's up with you Jongin? You look like you hadn't slept for weeks“, the familiar, deep voice called him back to reality.

He looks up, finding two black orbs looking at him with genuine concern.

He averts his gaze, sighing again while flopping down on his seat.

„I thought I'm late already, where is everyone?“, Jongin asks, partly frankly curious, partly just too lazy and exhausted to talk about what happened.

Eitherway, Sehun catches the hint and answers as casual as possible: „It's the last day before summer holidays. I guess everyone is busy taking the next plane to an exotic destination, instead of getting spoiled with paint.“

He examines Jongin a little closer. „You're free to leave as well. You really don't look all too well.“

But Jongin just faintly shakes his head, digging up his stuff from under his books. „It's ok. It's actually nice to have some quiet while working. And if anything …“, he trails off, looking at his half-done picture, „it's nice to have some distraction.“

Sehun leans against his table, not letting Jongin out of his sight. „You really sure everything's alright?“

This time Jongin let's out an irritated huff, pretending to sort his brushes on the table.

„Listen, with all due respect, I really don't wanna discuss that now.“

It's enough for Sehun to stay quiet for the next couple of minutes.

He indulges in correcting some tests, before looking up, seeing Jongin lazily painting on his artwork.

He could tell from the spaced out expression on his face that Jongin really isn't paying attention to what he is doing right now.

Sehun has to find another way of getting Jongin to talk.

He blames it on a bad gut feeling but looking at Jongin in a mental state like that, he is almost sure that he'd do something dumb over the holidays.

Sure, he'd be able to grab him at youth club as well but Sehun isn't really sure if he'd show up again with an aura as ed up as his'.

So he quietly get's up from his desk, rounding some tables until he stops behind Jongin standing infront of his picture, doing some lazy .

„What's this picture about?“

The sudden impact of the voice startles Jongin and he drops the brush.

Completely confused and slightly embarassed he hastily gets down to pick up the brush.

„I'm so sorry, I wasn't paying attention“, he mumbles an excuse before turning to the picture again, not wanting his blush to be exposed to Sehuns questioning eyes.

„Well the topic is 'Regret'“, Jongin resumes absentmindedly, stopping the movement of his brush midway. „I'm not quite sure what I'm regretting the most right now. Perhaps that's why this picture just won't take a proper form.“

He let's out a sigh of frustration, flopping down on his seat.

Sehun pulls a nearby chair to sit as well. He looks at Jongin for a while, thoughtful, before speaking up with his deep, smooth voice: „It's not always what we're regretting most right now. Much too often we witness regrets not until a decent amount of time has passed.“ He looks down. „Wanna know what I regret most?“

Jongin looks at him, not quite sure if he wants to know. Still he nods his head, curious after all what a stuck-up like him could regret so much.

„You know when I was younger, about your age, I had an incredibly hard time defining my identity. I guess that's common for teenagers, especially at this age. But it still felt terrible. My parents were not what I wanted to be and at that time I always asked myself what my real parents were like. What I had in common with them, what they'd tell me instead of my adoptive parents who always drilled the wish into me to be successfull, smart, rich someday. That time I didn't want that. The hell why should a highschooler worry about such nonesense after all? Anyway, I found myself experimenting quite a lot with different kinds of people to see if anything fitted me after all and well here comes the cliché kicking in. I got immersed in the wrong crowd. You know, drugs, alcohol, skipping class etc. It felt good, we were powerful, we were cool. Everyone wanted to be around us. But it didn't stop there. Eventually I got out of the crowd into a more … specific organization.“

Jongin a brow. „Means you were in a gang?“

Sehun smiles faintly, nodding. „Damn right I was. No one knew about this. Not my parents, not the crowd I hung around with, no one. And I was comfortable with it. It was like something only I had to myself, my dirty little secret. It felt right that time until I discovered what was really going down. I remember clear as day that one day, we were confronted by a rival gang and I'll never forget what happened.“

Eventually Jongin got a faint notion of what might have happened. Nevertheless he lets Sehun talk on.

„Well I remember holding their shredded bodies. Those were good friends of mine and it hurts up until now that I couldn't do nothing but see them die, executed because we didn't satisfy a deal. It was the cruelest thing I've ever witnessed.“

His dark orbs change into a hurt expression, his hands nervously fumbling.

„I regret not noticing earlier what I've gotten myself into. It's game you can't win. And in the end, you'll get nothing out of it. All the about loyalty and brotherhood means nothing if you have to bury your so called brothers six feet under in the end. The whole nonesense about honor and , it all means nothing because at the end of the day it's just a whitewash for covering up that you're the scum of society and shouldn't have the confidence you get from being in a gang. It's nothing but hot air. I would've been better off if I didn't have to witness all of the things I had to witness.“

A long, thoughtful silence stretched between them.

Jongin sits there, completely astonished by Sehuns story.

He doesn't want to believe this brag has a past like this, it's just something that his brain refuses to process.

Perhaps it's just another story to get Jongin to move into the right direction, a necessary lie to be persuasive.

But the hurt expression on Sehuns face, the strained voice with which he was speaking just now, everything that seems so hateful for what had happened … It all just seems way too real to be made up.

„I never got caught, that's my luck. Elsewise I woudn't be able to sit here, teaching what I love to do. But I had plenty of mates who weren't as lucky as I was.“

Jongin really wants to pretend that he doesn't care hard but deep down he feels Sehun having turned some switches around. A slight feeling of denial and defense creeps up his gut.

Of course he wouldn't be as dumb. He's way too smart to get into all kinds of gang . There's no need for Sehun to be overprotective like this at all.

Still he couldn't shake off the feeling of being caught and a faint notion of anger slowly creeps up his stomach.

Sehun notices the shift in Jongins behaviour and quickly gets up to head to his desk again.

He knows that any further probing would lead to nothing but more denial and arguments, so he resumes to correcting tests again, letting his words sink in on Jongin.

Stupid smartass of a teacher, Jongin bitterly thinks to himself as he continues to clean the youth club a few days later.

Sehuns words still stick with him everyday and he couldn't stop mulling over them with a newly found anger that causes him to curse Sehun over and over again.

He knows exactly why Sehun had to tell him exactly this kind of story.

Why the hell couldn't he just stop worrying about Jongin and carry on with his own stuff?! Was it so hard to just focus on being a teacher instead of playing the shrink?

Goddamnit.

Jongin ruffles his messy hair, throwing away the trash a little more aggressive than intended, before flopping down on the stage with an exhausted groan.

Working in a climate like this surely doesn't contribute to having it easy these days.

Summer fully kicked in and the air was hot and humid all around the city.

The students that remained home theses holidays, visiting the youth club basically just hung around in the air-conditioned building, sipping on cool drinks.

Jongin couldn't deny it was a fun time to be around girls as the clothes got shorter and shorter with the temperatures rising but he had zero time to enjoy as work called way too often.

Now that he's sitting on the stage, throwing some shadow, he's more than happy for work to finally be over.

He wipes the sweat off his forhead before a familiar voice catches his attention.

„Was more than enough today, here have one, you deserve it.“

Sehun hands Jongin a cold bottle.

He's more than surprised to see that it's a bottle of beer but hell he doesn't ask and takes it gratefully, opening it with the edge of the stage.

„Thanks for helping out today“, Sehun smiles as they clink bottles together, both taking a generous sip of the cold beverage.

„No probz, I'm free for the holidays anyway.“

„Got nothing planned? Vacation or something?“

Jongin shakes his head. „I've got other things to worry about.“

His eyes trail off into the distance with a thoughtful look. Given the situation he's facing right now, something like a vacation seems to be the most insignificant thing to worry about.

Jogin's still torn between going to college and leaving his mom alone with this violent bastard, knowing things wouldn't change soon or getting a job to get both of them out of the apartment and away from his hated stepfather.

„What do you do when you feel conflicted?“, he suddenly asks, earning a surprised eyebrow from Sehun.

Jongin lowers his head in slight embarassement.

„I mean, not the what am I gonna eat type of conflicted but the real juicy stuff.“

Sehun knows it'd be no good to ask what's going on now so he quietly thinks for a while, taking another sip.

„Well I can only speak for myself and the stuff I saw. But back then, when I struggled to get out of the gang I pondered two possibilities. Either I get out of the gang and take my exams to get into college or I'll stay in the gang. Then I honestly asked myself: Where am I in roughly ten years if I choose either side? I mean you really gotta be honest with yourself. Sugarcoating is pointless and won't get you anywhere. Anyway, as I thought about the ten years remaining in the gang I saw myself six feet under, buried in some random place no one would ever come to visit and it gave me the most frightening shock of my life. That's when I decided to get out. It wasn't easy and sometimes I'm still afraid they'll find me and do God knows what with me. Still I feel like I've made the right decision.“

Sehun dares to take a look at Jongin.

He's deep in thoughts, biting his lips with a strained frown, his legs dangling mindlessly off the stage.

„Ten years“, Jongin mumbles, still frowning.

After a couple of minutes, he let's out an exasperated sigh.

„Aiiiish this is just too much.“ He ruffles his hair in agony.

„I know what the right decision is already but I can't get myself to do it. And I don't have that much time left. …“

Sehun examines his student for a while in silence, before he puts his hand on Jongins shoulder.

„You'll do what's right when the time has come, I'm sure. Don't stress yourself too much. You're still so young.“

„Go pretend that you're getting old Mr. Oh“, Jongin jokes nonchalantly, trying to ease the awkwardness off the situation.

It somehow seems to work, Sehun lets out a soft chuckle, patting Jongins shoulder a few times before pulling his hand away.

„You'll understand once you're in my shoes, surrounded by a bunch of youngsters.“

He looks at Jongin, a mischievous smirk on his full lips. „You'll automatically feel old.“

Jongin couldn't help but grin at Sehuns remark. It seems too surreal feeling old surrounded by a crowd of young people.

„I always thought that's exactly what keeps oneself young?“

Sehun shrugs his shoulders. „Well that's exactly what they say about the life of midwives once they get into their midlife crisis. But look at them, they still got wrinkles and lines from smoking way too much. Thank God there are things like anti-aging lotions.“

„You've gotta be kiddin' me“, Jongin exclaims, shaken by uncontrollable laughter. Sehun joins in, his deep, husky voice echoing around the area.

For a brief moment, Jongin had actually forgotten what he was worrying about just now. A couple of seconds seem to get lost in the hot, humid evening air together with the slightly bitter taste of beer and the scent of dusty streets.

Oh sweet Lord that's gotta be the third update or so in a week?! Hellzies what's goin# ON? :D

Anyways I guess it's not to your dislike so please enjoy the new chapter ;)

I've read in a comment that some are wondering why Sehun is being so fixed on Jongin so here's kind of an answer :) 

Hope you had a great weekend so far and have a great rest of it :D

Big shoutout to all the new subbies, you really make me happy everytime I see a new one <3

And of course thanks for your comments they always make my day <3 

Love you lil cupcakes :*