Leo. Real name is Jung Taekwoon.

N. Real name is Cha Hakyeon.

Both were part of an idol group in South Korea called VIXX, along with four other members who are younger than them.

When Hakyeon first met Taekwoon, he felt that there was something special about the singing prodigy. Taekwoon was quiet and at times, his gazes were too intense for the young ones to handle. Others were afraid of him but Hakyeon was not.

The CEO of their agency, Jellyfish Entertainment, has appointed a special task for Hakyeon since day one when Taekwoon joined the group of trainees. To make sure that Taekwoon felt comfortable with others and help him make friends.

Hakyeon was determined to carry out such a mission. There was no one whom Cha Hakyeon could not handle. He could make friends with literally anyone or anything.

Sometimes too much of a social butterfly.

But Hakyeon’s way of taking care of Taekwoon was a bit too much for his lifelong friend to handle. Too affection for Taekwoon.

Taekwoon would always refuse Hakyeon's affections yet strangely enough, he enjoyed the company of the younger ones.

Why is that? What doesn't Taekwoon like Hakyeon?

Wherever Taekwoon goes, Hakyeon would follow. When Taekwoon was having a hard time with interviews, Hakyeon would rush to his aid. Hakyeon thought that with everything he was doing for Taekwoon, the latter would eventually return that affection and appreciate it.

But Hakyeon was wrong.

In fact, it had the opposite affection. The more Hakyeon approached Taekwoon, the more Taekwoon would back away.

What am I doing wrong? Hakyeon did not know the answer to it.

As the six boys were sitting in the waiting room before their turn to go on stage, Hakyeon kept glancing at Taekwoon.

‘What?’ Taekwoon said sternly with his alias as Leo.

‘Huh?’

‘You're staring at me. If you have something to say, say it.’

‘What? I don't have anything to say. Can't you be a bit nicer with the way you're talking to me? I am still older than you.’

‘By a few months.’ Taekwoon glared at Hakyeon.

What if their birth months were the other way around instead? What if Leo was the older one in the group? What if he was the leader instead?

Ah… I need to stop. Having these thoughts isn't going to change anything anyways. Hakyeon tried to meditate his negative thoughts away.

‘You two hyungs need to stop fighting.’ Wonshik said.

‘Yeah, what's wrong with you two lately? All you guys do is argue nowadays.’ Hongbin joined in on the conversation because he was worried.

‘We’re not arguing.’ Taekwoon replied and glanced at Hakyeon.

‘Uh, yeah. We're not arguing don't worry about it.’

Hakyeon doesn't remember when but the distance between him and Taekwoon grew further. Did Taekwoon successfully push him away after all these years?

As they were called up for their turn to be on stage, Hakyeon stood behind to watch the kids walk out before him. He saw that his lifelong friend was clinging closely to Jaehwan despite how he has always rejected Hakyeon’s touch. Hakyeon was annoyed.

Hakyeon doesn't remember when but he became afraid to approaching Taekwoon like he used to. He was afraid of touching the other.

When did it start? When did I become so afraid to approach Taekwoon?

Was it after I realized… my feelings…?

~

With their song Love Equation promotions finally over, Hakyeon no longer had to pretend. He was nervous each time he had to hold onto Taekwoon on stage even if it was a part of the choreography.

‘Can you stop rubbing your body all over me during the performance?’ Leo once demanded from Hakyeon. ‘It's gross.’

Hakyeon remembered how much his heart burned that day. It was an unexplainable pain. Hakyeon lied to the rest of the members saying that he was busy with coming up with another choreography for the group's next comeback one night but in reality, he hid himself in the dance studio, crying all night long.

Being hated by others didn't hurt as much as being hated by the one person you cherish the most.

‘Hyung, is there any schedules I can do before our next comeback?’ Hakyeon asked their CEO, Sejun.

‘Huh? What's with this all of a sudden?’

‘Nothing. I just don't want to sit around and do nothing while our group is still unknown to the public. It makes St☆rlights really sad each time the public overlooks us.’

‘But you guys just got eight consecutive wins on music shows and are doing exceptionally well on the charts. You've made a great name for the group as the one who claims the title as concept-dols in the industry... What's wrong?’ Sejun knew something was wrong with Hakyeon whom he's watched over the past few years.

‘I… I'm tired hyung. I want some time alone. Away from the members. Please.’ Hakyeon pleaded.

‘I understand. I don't know what happened but if that's what you want, I'll help you see if there are a few other jobs for you to do individually for the time being. But don't overwork yourself okay? That's the only thing I want from you in return.’

‘Thanks hyung. I will keep that in mind.’

Thankfully Sejun-hyung didn't question Hakyeon as to why the boy wanted to be alone.

Soon, Hakyeon’s schedule was packed. Radios, dramas and variety shows. He got the schedule he wanted but he was feeling the physical weight all over his body.

He would often sleep in the car while transiting from one schedule to the next or end up falling asleep on the sofa the moment he got back to the dorm. He barely saw nor talked to the rest of s, nor did he talk much at all with Taekwoon.

But this was what Taekwoon wanted right? For Hakyeon to leave him alone.

Than his wish was heard.

Hakyeon took time out of his busy schedule to attend VIXX LR’s showcase along with Jaehwan and Hyuk once. Even if Hakyeon was reluctant at first, he was still the leader of the group. And after all, it was their group’s first subunit. A subunit of the two most talented members in the group.

‘We barely get to see each other anymore.’ Leo said during the showcase interview.

‘What? But we saw each other on the sofa the other night didn't we?’ Hakyeon tried to keep his voice playful while the many fans were watching. I'm okay I can do this. Just a little more and it'll be over. Plus, why do you care? You're such a liar Jung Taekwoon.

Being a part of the subunit seems to have changed Taekwoon. Hakyeon could see that Taekwoon was adjusting fine alone as the leader of the subunit. From time to time he would even make jokes or tease the younger members. Taekwoon was fine without Hakyeon. Maybe he was fine all along without Hakyeon’s help after all… even since the beginning.

Hakyeon was tired. Tired from his schedules, tired from his worries, and tired of himself.

‘Hyung?! Hakyeon-hyung!??’

Hakyeon could hear the voices of s calling for his name, as his vision grew darker. Eventually, he could only see black in front of him.