SeolHyun

My bags are packed and ready to go, but Wonho wants me to leave them be for now. We don't need them where we're going. Which brings me to the next item on my list: where the hell are we going? Wonho keeps on telling me this is a date, just for the two of us. I kind of get anxious when he says stuff like that, as if we don't have a lot of time together anymore. I know we'll see each other less, starting tomorrow, but it won't be the end of the world. He's being silly for no reason. 

He takes his car and we just drive. I don't feel like talking, I've talked enough for today. Talking has worn me out. Wonho seems to understand this and just respects my feelings. That's part of why I like who he is now. Somehow he has changed into a person who respects women more. Or is it just me who he respects more? I'd like to think it's women in general, but I don't judge him for it. He's one of the few people who know about everything. He's also someone who doesn't laugh at me for having these fears inside of me. Wonho takes care me whenever I need taken care of. I can take care of myself too, but it's nice to have someone whom you can rely on. And he is that person for me. 

I was so scared when I first saw him again. Was he trustworthy? Would he understand? I know now that those questions were redundant. Of course I could trust him. He's always been there for me during those rough times. When he became a star he was just busy training and doing his best. I get that now. I was naive when we first started seeing each other. It feels like I've grown up quite a bit over these past few weeks. Wonho too, he's become more grown up and takes responsibility for whatever he does. I feel like this is a person I can go all the way with. And that's what I've done. I've gone all the way with this amazing person. And I don't regret it at all. 

"What are you looking at?" he asks me with a little smile on his lips. I didn't even notice the fact that I was staring at him. "And why are you smiling like that?" 

"Nothing..." I quickly brush it off and turn my attention to my phone. This is still embarrassing. Although he is my boyfriend, I still get embarrassed while admiring him. He is worth the admiring though. There nothing about him that's ugly. Even his tattoos are amazing in their own ways. He got them while being stupid, but they suit him. They resemble him very well. 

"You were staring at me", he doesn't let it go that easily. He's always been vain and this time will be no exception. 

"I was not..." we both know who is going to win this anyways. 

"Jus admit it, you were staring at the beauty that is me", he chuckles a little and I snort. Yes, I snorted. 

"Don't be so full of yourself", I roll my eyes at him and look out the window. "And where the hell are we even going?" 

I haven't been paying attention to my surroundings at all. I've been to absorbed in my own thoughts and in how amazing Wonho looks. He's right, I was taking it all in. That doesn't mean he needs to know that. He already has a huge ego to deal with, better not make it worse. The scenery has changed a lot and I have no idea of where we are. 

"We're almost there", he says with a grin plastered across his face. Even while grinning evilly, he looks like a damn model. Can he not? It makes me mad. He's always been so beautiful to look at. Back when we lived in the village, girls couldn't keep their eyes off him. Wonho always received a lot of love letters and confessions. Every Valentine he would get so much candy. He never returned it on White Day, he only gave me some chocolates. Now I know he kind of liked me back then too, but still. It was a nice gesture. The only nice one I ever got. 

"Where is there?" I try again, but he doesn't budge at all. I sigh and look out the window again. It does seem vaguely familiar. I've been here before. A long, long time ago. But why? That's the million dollar question... 

"You'll see", he takes my hand in his and squeezes it. It's nice and warm while the weather outside seems to be cooling down a bit. It's getting late and the temperature is dropping fast. Luckily, we're still in the car. In the end he finally pulls into a parking lot and I know where he's taking me. We've been here before, almost 10 years ago or something like that. It was our first 'date' if you can call it that. Wonho was all over the place, crying, back then. It seems like he hasn't gotten over his fear of amusement parks just yet. I watched 'Right Now' and it was hilarious. 

We're at an amusement park, not too far away from our village. I look at him with watery eyes. It's all closed up, except for a single light at the entrance. Someone is waiting for us. 

"Did you rent this?" I ask, mouth dropping open. 

"I know some people that work here and pulled some strings", he smiles sweetly and steps out of the car. He opens my door and I fall into his arms. We just stand there and kiss, like there is no tomorrow. A desperate kind of kiss. "There will only be one person here for the whole night and he won't tell." 

I kiss him once more. I can't believe he remembered how much I love these things. We went on all the rides back then, he was so scared but sat through it for me. All for me. And now he's prepared to do it again. As a date. God, is he sweet, or what? 

"If I knew you'd be kissing me all the time I would've done this way sooner", Wonho chuckles and I smile against his lips. He finally pulls away and takes my hand in his to walk. Darkness is settling in over us as we walk towards the lights. 

"You're amazing", I whisper as we walk inside. The person who let us in is trying very hard to be invisible. I don't even notice him at all as we walk towards one of the rides. "Wanna go on this?" I ask, knowing he hates it a lot. I want to see his reaction to this. 

"Sure, whatever you like", he doesn't let anything shine through and just pretends to be fine with us going on this ride. It's a rollercoaster with a lot of turns. He gets very sick on these kind of rides. 

"Let's try something else first", I say, knowing he is staying strong for me. Wonho squeezes my hand to show me thanks. We both know why I'm not going on that ride. We walk on and find a nice couple ride. They're boats that go around. It's quiet and we just spin around a little. I put my head on Wonho's shoulder as we pass underneath a little arch.  

"Do you remember me getting you chocolates for White Day?" he asks me with a soft voice. I nod my head against his throat. "I made those myself, you know. My mom helped me, but I really wanted to make them myself..." 

I lift up my head and smile at how cute he is being. I never had any kind of idea about that. I just thought he'd bought them at the store. Truth is, Wonho is more considerate than he leads on. He doesn't want people to think he is a wuss. To me, he is the strongest person on this planet. But he does has some kind of image to uphold for the fans. They already know he is a sentimental kind of person. Which is bad enough in his own eyes. He tries to control everything about his image, a little too much if you ask me. Wonho should be himself. Now and always. Because that's the person I like the most. The person I fell in love with in the first place. But what do I know about love? Is this real love? 

"You're not saying anything... Were they that bad?" he asks me with a worried look on his face. I just laugh and peck his lips. 

"They were amazing. Way better than store bought ones!" I don't remember the taste of them at all, since it's been quite a while. He does smile and hugs me a little tighter. We stay like that for quite some time. The ride goes on unless we want it to stop. Which we both don't. This is our little bubble. We can stay here until the morning light. 

"Let's get onto something else", Wonho says after a good half hour more. We go on most rides. I pick those that don't bother Wonho, because that's what you do for your boyfriend. Afterwards Wonho buys me cotton candy and I hesitate to eat it. 

"Don't tell me you're still thinking about your weight..." he nags and I roll my eyes. 

"I can't have gained weight after coming back from a vacation. We have to start preparing again soon... If I have to diet while doing that, it'll be absolute hell..." I explain to him. He should know better than anyone. 

"I know how hard it is. But you're perfect the way you are. Your male fans think so too. You don't need to lose any more weight..." He tells me while pulling me close. Our noses touch and he closes his eyes. "It's painful to see you starving yourself." 

"Don't be like that", I whine a little. My heart breaks as he talks to me like that. I had no idea this was hurting him too. "The company wants me to lose weight." 

"I think I should talk to them..." his voice sounds a bit angry, but I ignore it. 

"Let it be." 

He kisses my lips softly and then suddenly puts some cotton candy into my mouth. The taste is sweet and just as amazing as I had imagined. "Might as well eat it all now." He is grinning. I can almost feel him grinning. God, he is cunning. 

We stay at the amusement park for a while longer, neither of us wanting to go home. We still have to get our bags and make the overnight trip. I'm expected in our dorms first thing tomorrow morning. I'm sure they won't be able to laugh at me being late because of my boyfriend. They're not thrilled with the idea of me having a boyfriend altogether yet. 

"Should we go home?" Wonho asks at some point. 

"I don't want to", I say while resting my head on his chest and standing close to him. 

"Me neither, but we'll have to", he says, patting my back. That's when we let go and walk back to the car. Wonho gives the guy a little cash and says goodbye. Once we're back at our hotel, we grab our bags and I slip into something more comfortable. My black yoga pants and an oversized hoody. Wonho whistles once before checking us out and taking the bags to the car. I'm  wearing my hat and a mouth mask so no one notices us again. 

The car ride is way too short as Wonho drops me off at the dorms. We say goodbye, discreetly, before I go inside. The girls are all asleep when I crawl into my bed. I miss him. Is this love?