Author's note: I'm blocked yesterday, till now. I have this chapter ready and so does chapter 10 to 11 but my mind is off about it so i didn't let it out. I'm editing all the following chapters so don't expect me to  let it out today. I probably disappointed you guys. I missed my regular updates and your expectations, so I'm terribly sorry.

--

Myungsoo's POV

 

After two days, Sungyeol regained his energy back and was finally eating lively as ever. Our friends always visits during their free time, while I am skipping work just to keep an eye on him, which my parents doesn't mind too much.

 

And tonight, I ought to get on with it and convince Sungyeol to take the operation. I have the conditions in my hand that could push him inside the operating room.

 

I move closer to Sungyeol's bed. He was reading a book and I finally turned off the television in his room. He's back in the normal room for check ups and complete rest.

 

I sat down on the chair beside his bed and cough to have his attention.

 

"Yeol... can I ask you something?"

 

He turn to me and let go of the book after folding the side of it as a mark on the page he's into. "What is it?"

 

I gulped and twitch my hands playfully. "The heart transplantation--"

 

"Myung, I don't want to hear it."

 

I shoot my head upwards, annoyed. "Why? That's the only way to make you live longer than--"

 

"Than when? Myungsoo, Soohyun opened everything about my health conditions. You probably know that I won't make it back surely 100%."

 

"What made you so scared on taking it?"

 

I bit my lips and tried to hold back the tears filling my eyes. Of course I know that. I ing know that so well, I could die.

 

"That operation can take me away from you and never come ba--"

 

"You. Will. Make. It." I cut him off with gritted teeth. I clasped his hands tightly and make him look at me. "You'll be Woohyun-hyung's best man on their wedding day, and my groom with our own. We will plan that wedding of ours and make everyone die in envy because they ain't tying down the two eligible bachelors. We will make love without worry. I'll let you mess with me the way you want it... no matter how many rounds, I'll take you in..."

 

He looked at me wide eyed and I smiled at him widely. "I want you so bad, and I want you to me right here, right now. But I know we can't do that... with your condition..."

 

"Kim Myungsoo...I can't believe you'll convince me to have that heart transplantation operation with this erted ways of yours, and I haven't even put my hands on you yet..."

 

He says and smiled widely back at me and caress my cheeks.

 

But then he grew serious...

 

"If i were to take that operation... let it be after our engagement, and wedding. And Woogyu's wedding... let it all end. So that if I die in that operation... I won't have regrets because I witnessed my friends being all happy finally..."

 

Tears came rushing from my eyes as Sungyeol said those words sincerely while playing with my hands. Tears escapes his eyes too but he's trying not to let them fall, but failed.

 

"The only regrets I'll have by then... is leaving you behind... I-I don't trust myself making it out there alive, Myung---"

 

"Ssssh...." I put a finger on his lips to shut him off and kissed him firmly. "You'll make it... we will continue with our plans about the house that you want... we will adopt kids and be happy. You won't leave me behind, Yeol. I know you won't... you love me that much."

 

His lips broke into a smile and he took me on his arms for a hug. "I can't promise that one... but I will try.. do we have a deal, then?"

 

I nod under his hug and when the nurses came in to check on him, I let go. I said I'll leave for awhile to grab some fruits in the canteen but I went to see Soohyun in his office. Who happens to be talking with our parents.

 

"He's not reacting with his medicines. We have to hurry..."

 

I whimpered. I knew it. I knew it. This is bad news. So bad, I'd die.

 

I lean on the wall and waited for Soohyun to continue.

 

"We have to hurry, or else. We'll lose him..."

 

"I talked to him about it. He says he'll undergo in that operation."

 

They all turn to me but got worried instead because I'm crying. I bit my lips and continue, "But he wanted to have it after our friends and the two of us got married... it's as if... he knows he won't make it back Soohyun... I'm so scared and I'm starting to hate the idea of convincing him undergo in that operation either... I'm so afraid I'll lose him..."

 

Mom and Mrs. Lee held me close with a tight hug and I cried hysterically to that. I don't know what to feel. I feel numb. And dying. But what can I do? I'm so afraid.

 

"If I were to choose for my son, I'd rather not let him have that operation either... I'm so scared ill lose him."

 

If that happens, this will probably the most painful scenario of Sungyeol leaving me. And I know I wouldn't be able to make it alive from that too... if I did lose him... no. I won't lose him. Not now. Not never.

 

Sungyeol will make it out there alive.

 

--

 

Day four of Sungyeol's confinement, he's showing good tolerance about the new prescription medicines to him. But as long as he's feeling nauseous, he was not allowed to leave the hospital yet.

 

I grab the foods inside my Audi and went inside the hospital. Woohyun-hyung came in from the other side of the corridor checking papers and I think he just arrived also. I went closer to him.

 

"Hi, hyung. Having rounds?"

 

He looked at me and it's surprising seeing him... stressed?

 

"Woah, hyung... what happen? You look... terrible."

 

He sit down on a nearby seat and facepalm himself as he lean weakly against the wall.

 

"My patient... almost died today."

 

I stood there frozen standing in front of him in astonishment.

 

"What? Who among them?"

 

He shook his head. "A kid... seven years old. Her name is Cleo. She has a twin... Claud. She's been hospitalized since she was five.." he gulped then turn to me. "Almost having the same thing as Sungyeol... only hers is... much more severe than Yeollie..."

 

I sat down beside him, clutching the paper bags in my hand as I listened to him continue. "They're orphan, Myungsoo... they can't handle expenses. So I took them in... but the girl... she almost died--"

 

I hugged Woohyun-hyung because he started sobbing. But he then shook his head and freed himself before he continues. "...the medicine was too much for her to handle... she can't take it... she just don't react on it. And worst, it's not helping her anymore..."

 

"Is.. is it that bad?"

 

He nods. "Its coronary heart disease, Myung... much more dangerous than  Yeollie's..."

 

I stood up when he stands and follow him back to Sungyeol's room.

 

"Hyung, are you checking Sungyeol's condition?"

 

He shook his head lightly and look at me. "I can only have an update from Soohyun. But the rest is confidential. I've heard it's... gonna be dangerous. And living after the operation isn't guaranteed."

 

I lower down my gaze as my heart tightens to that. We are all aware that we could lose Sungyeol. And I know that it's not only my heart who's close to breaking right now.

 

We open his room and Sungyeol isn't inside.

 

"Where? Where is he?"

 

Woohyun rushed in the room to check the comfort room but he's  not there. I then, used the phone to call the nurses station and they started running to us.

 

"Where's the patient here?!"

 

The assigned nurses to his room don't know what to say. One nurse approach the blinds and lift it up to see the open garden.

 

"He's down there, Doc. He's with... Claud."

 

We all turn to Tiffany. The nurse who approach the blind and look for ourselves.

 

Sungyeol is sitting on a bench with a kid. Maybe at the age of seven. He's holding a book and Sungyeol is ruffling his head as the kid giggle. The kid looks handsome at a very young age.

 

"That's Claud, Myungsoo... the twin brother of Cleo. My patient."

 

Woohyun-hyung and I rode the elevator down to reach the ground floor as soon as possible. Sungyeol isn't allowed to leave the bed yet. What if he suddenly collapsed again? I can't take it. Seeing him unconscious is making me dizzy to the point that I'd faint myself.

 

The two of us run towards the way to the garden. And we saw how Sungyeol is laughing his out while the kid is sitting on his lap now.

 

"...wait till you meet my Lover, Claud. He's really hot. And nice. And the best thing that ever happened to me."

 

I stopped behind him as i heard those words. He's talking about me?

 

"I'm just so glad that you're open to this kind of relationships, you know?"

 

"I'm not someone who can't understand other people's perspective. Though I'm wondering how they make it work? Relationships could be troublesome after all. How do you make it work with your lover, hyung?"

 

Sungyeol smiled and ruffled the kid's hair. "In every relationship, one law are to be accepted in order to make things work naturally."

 

"And what is that law, hyung?"

 

"Never let your partner feel so alone especially when you're there."

 

The boy looked at Sungyeol confused and he just smiled again. "Anyway, you don't really mind me and my lover adopting you and your sister?"

 

The kid shook his head and smiled at Sungyeol. And I furrow my eyebrows in surprise as the kid's smile is almost similar to what Sungyeol has.

 

"I don't mind at all, Sungyeol-hyung... and I know Cleo will like the idea too. And with that, I can finally go back to school. Because you'll be there to take care of her..."

 

"Of course. Myungsoo will like you too. I know he would."

 

Sungyeol ruffled the younger's hair again.

 

"But, hyung..."

 

"Hmm? What is it?"

 

"You're not here because you're... you're dying too right?"

 

Sungyeol's smile lessen as he look up the sky and Woohyun-hyung held me close for support. I can hear he's sobbing beside me and I'm about to do exactly the same when I heard Sungyeol's answer.

 

"I won't die... because I have him waiting for me. Just like how Cleo have you waiting for her." he turns to Claud who got teary eyed. "And when me and Cleo did... die, at least you two are together. You'll take care of Myungsoo for me, once I'm gone... is that okay Claud?"

 

"Will he take care of me too?"

 

The kid is crying and Sungyeol wipe the tears away from his eyes. "Of course he will. I need someone to look after my Myungsoo once I'm gone..."

 

I can't take it anymore. I run towards him and hug him from the back. He was surprised with the sudden contact but as soon as he saw the bracelet and the ring on me, he calmed down and held my hands tightly.

 

"See? He's already crying. Even if I'm still here..." he chuckles. "Love, this is Claud. He'll be the one to take care of you--"

 

"You and Cleo will make it out there alive, don't you ing die on us, Sungyeol!" I tighten my hug as I buried my face on the shallow of his neck and cry my heart out. "We will adopt the twins... we will be a happy family. There's no way you'll leave us."

 

I don't know why but when Claud beside us cries loudly as he hugged us both, I know that I finally found the missing pieces in the puzzle we have before us.

 

Claud, despite seeing him just now, I know that he's a great kid. And how i wish to meet Cleo soon too.

 

"I don't know why we're crying... but i don't want to lose hyung either! Waaaah!"

 

We both hugged Claud as tightly as we could. Then he held Sungyeol's face with both of his small hands and look directly into his eyes.

 

I smiled when I imagine myself throwing that look to Sungyeol.

 

"You won't die, right hyung? You won't leave me. You'll adopt me and Cleo soon and we will become a family."

 

Sungyeol nods and pat the kid's head.

 

"We will... right  Myung?"

 

I nod and hugged the kid again. "We will become a family, Claud."

 

--

 

After one week of confinement, Sungyeol and I decided to just go home in Topaz and let our mom's visits us whenever we needed them. Sungyeol gave me a medicine box in case he forgot his own. And for me to remind him about it since we don't want to mess this up. And exactly two days after, my family and his family decided to meet in a restaurant. I don't have any idea why, but we obliged anyway.

 

Sungyeol is back to normal. For now. And I'm as worried about him everyday. We are visiting the twins and decided to help them with their fees in the hospital, even though Woohyun-hyung shouldered the expenses already. He really wanted to save Cleo.

 

But anyway, we arrived in the restaurant and was surprised to see our family members complete. Moonsoo and Daeyeol are there. And Sungyeol's grandparents. And our parents.

 

We seated separately, but we're sitting across each other.

 

"What is this about? I swear if you..."

 

Dad placed a box in front of Sungyeol and I suddenly got nervous.

 

"What-- what's this?"

 

"Can you guess what's inside?"

 

"A... w-wedding ring?"

 

"Woah kid, slow down... that's just an engagement ring."

 

Me and Sungyeol looked at each other dumbfounded. Then Dad squeezed my hand firmly and sincerely look at me.

 

"He won. The bets, the consequences... he flips the table in everything we made a deal about... and this is the final draw. I told him that the actual engagement ceremony can only happen, if his grandparents said say yes to it.

 

And they did, Myung..."

 

Oh my God. This... is actually happening right now?

 

"Well? Say something, you two."

 

We both flinched and look at each other. Sungyeol is... serious. Dead serious.

 

"You're not rushing things because of my condition right? Because if you do---"

 

"What are you saying kid? You earned him back flawlessly. I lose in everything we talked about. And... if you get married to him now, you'll have more reasons to live long."

 

Sungyeol open the box and keep it near his heart and hug it... tears in his eyes.

 

I reach out to him and wipe his tears away and we all got worried. He can't be sad. Nor too much happy.

 

Soohyun said all that.

 

"Hey, Love... look at me. Are you alright?"

 

"No... I'm not."

 

"Oh my--"

 

"But in a good way... but my heart hurts... but I'm happy... but still, my heart hurts..."

 

We all stood to come near him and i grab the medicine in my pockets but he shook his head when I tried to shove it inside his mouth. Then he suddenly took my hand and slid the ring in my fingers and kissed it as he look up to me with that smile on his lips and tears in his eyes.

 

"Marry me?"

 

I smile and knelt down before him. "Of course I will.. need not to ask. Because even if you don't ask, I'll marry you. And only you."

 

Sungyeol pull me and hug me tightly. Oh God, I cannot be any happier right now... please... please don't take him away from me so early... I need him. I still need him beside me... please...

 

--

 

Howon's POV

 

When Sungyeol got discharged after a week of confinement, the day following that day, we decided to visit him in their unit in Topaz. But both of them are nowhere inside their unit so I decided to just go.

 

The planning on WooGyu's wedding are put on hold because of what happened. I guess everyone is adjusting for Sungyeol, until he gets better.

 

I walked out of the Topaz building and meet up with Dongwoo and Sungjong on a nearby cafe.

 

Sungjong knows what we have in our hands that can't be announced till Sungyeol gets better. I wonder how Woohyun is taking this. I can only think of Sungyeol as the reason of their wedding plans being on hold.

 

Woohyun is so stubborn, he won't ask Gyu to have the meeting for their wedding this moment.

 

I sat down beside Sungjong and waited for Dongwoo who was at the counter when I came. He already saw me and gave me a smile asking me if I'm fine. Well of course he'll ask me. I'm sore right now. He just took me... four--- five times from night until the sun almost shining outside.

 

Sungjong saw how I winced and gave me a wicked knowing grin but didn't say anything. Why is Dongwoo so needy anyway? Is it because I'm being stubborn with our engagement on hold too? Of course I want Sungyeol to be my best man too. I wish that's possible. Because me and Woohyun share the same best friend, and that's Sungyeol.

 

I never really liked someone other than Sungyeol. Until Dongwoo came and I realized that what I had for Yeol before was pure... whatever. What's the point of denying it anyway. I loved him. And Woohyun did too. I mean the "love" okay? The Love everyone of us talks about. We fell in love with the same person. That Lee Sungyeol. Yes, that's true. But he's dense as . He never cares about the people who gave a about him.

 

The funny part of this love we had for Yeol is that, we almost confessed to him. After he came back from London. But when I was planning everything for confession, Woohyun told me that he loves Yeol. In a romantic way. Too. Though he didn't know yet that I have a thing for Yeol too before. And just to clear everything, I had mine since middle school. Woo had it in our early freshmen year in Senior High. When Sungyeol have to leave to meet the other side of their family in London.

 

Isn't that ed up? HAHA I can only laugh. To think that he's in a more or less three years with Sunggyu that time. They fought hard because of that. And Sunggyu made him realize that it was him he really wanted. Not Sungyeol.

 

We are saved. Because Sungyeol came back with a news for us. And that's Myungsoo. Our friend met someone and fell in love at first sight. Cool huh? We thanked the Gods for letting Yeol find someone deserving for him now. And we're happy for him.

 

I'm so thankful that everything ed up before we confessed to Sungyeol who will obviously turn us both down. He love us in a special friendly way, that's all there is to it. And I'm so blessed to be loved right now. And I'm the happiest even though I don't show it much, when him and Myungsoo get back together and now supporting each other.

 

And now, I'm watching Dongwoo's happy face as he came to us with my favorite drink and he immediately held my hand and kissed the back of it.

 

"They're not in their unit. Probably. That's  why you're back grumpy."

 

I nod.

 

"Where could they be? Sungyeol just got off the hospital and they're already out on a date..."

 

"Well, they're catching up right? And probably making more memories--- hey. Isn't that Woohyun and Sunggyu-hyung?"

 

The couple came from the same direction I came from looking dejected. Maybe they went to see the two too. As they saw us, Woo runs inside and came close to me for a hug.

 

"Have you seen Sungyeol?"

 

"No I haven't. I came from there too."

 

He pouts. "I need to tell him something important."

 

I let him sit down beside me as Gyu ordered for their drinks.

 

"Tell me about it."

 

"Well, we visited the jewelry shop for my and Gyu's wedding ring. And... I kinda have something for him too. His ring and Myungsoo's are made too."

 

I furrow my eyebrows, confused. "What ring?"

 

"Wedding bands, silly. Remember when I asked Sungyeol to accompany me somewhere once we got back to Seoul after our unplanned outing? We visited that jewelry shop. But that doesn't seem to be the case. Because that Jewelry shop holds the heirloom of the Lee family. And I think, when they decided to marry, they'll use the rings of his great great grandparents. If you know what I mean."

 

Wow. The heirloom of the Lee family? They'll use it? Is he crazy. He knows how their family reacts on---

 

My phone ring and it was Myungsoo's name flashed on my screen.

 

I answered it and put it on loudspeaker.

 

"Hey. You all came here? Where are you guys now?"

 

Myungsoo sounds sleepy just now. "You mean you're inside your unit all this time?"

 

"Yeah. I'm here. Yeol too. We just woke up. Anyway, why? Something happen?"

 

All five of us look at each other. The two love birds are inside their unit. Just woke up and... "We are in the nearby coffee shop.--"

 

"Howon?"

 

Now I can hear Sungyeol's voice, as sleepy as Myungsoo. "Yes it's Howon. What are you up to all night and you two just woke up?"

 

I heard him giggle. "Sorry. I was actually awake when you and Woo rings the doorbell. I'm just too tired to get up... anyway, you're all there? We have something to tell you guys."

 

What made him so tired to get up? I asked myself that but decided not to let it out my head.

 

"What? Me too! Woo too, have something to say to you."

 

"Oh really? Great. We'll be right there. Wait."

 

Sungyeol cut off the line and I stare back to Woohyun who was eyeing me confused too. Then he twitch his eyebrow up.

 

"What exactly is your news to Yeollie?"

 

Woohyun sips from his frappe and look at me intently.

 

I put my hand over the table to flaunt the obvious. And his eyes grew bigger and he suddenly smiled.

 

"OH MY GOD LEE HOWON! YOU'RE GETTING MARRIED?! TO WHOM?!"

 

It was too late to cover his mouth and I just scratch my nape. Sunggyu is looking at us as if reprimanding Woohyun for that loud voice, and Dongwoo smiled at me shyly as if saying I should've seen that coming and act before it actually happens. But I just shrug.

 

--

 

When the two came, hand in hand, Sowon and Junhyung came just behind them too. And we all transferred to much bigger spot for us to fit in.

 

And so, the couple is looking at each other as if they just met that day and was all smiling. While I'm nervous as because I don't know how I'll say it.

 

"So..." Sungyeol started as he look at me. "What exactly do you have for me?"

 

Me and Woo exchanged glances. But before i could even start... I saw that shining white gold simple cut ring on Myungsoo's ring finger while his trying to stir his frappe out of the excessive whipped cream. Woohyun follows to where my eyes is looking and just like me, his eyes widens.

 

Myungsoo noticed us and look at us as if we are so weird but he later realized that we're looking at his ring finger. So he kinda hide it but scratching his head.

 

"What was that just now? That doesn't look like a simple couple ring for me. And that isn't your promised ring from five years ago either." Woohyun says with his keen eyes.

 

Sungyeol caught up with the situation and smile. "That's because our promised ring is here..."

 

They both lift up their wrist to show their bracelet on us and the ring is really attached to it with that extended chain and I think they made adjustments to it.

 

"And what exactly does that rings indicates?" I questioned further and Sungyeol put his left hand over the table.

 

With the same ring as Myungsoo's on his ring finger.

 

"We are getting married. But I want the two of you.." he turns to Gyu and Woo... "to be first. I mean you've been planning for your wedding right--"

 

"Wait wait wait... what?! Can you please explain? The last time I checked, you are still waiting for your grandfather's approval and Myungsoo's Dad. What's with this?" Woo asked not hiding the irritation on his face.

 

Sungyeol sighs. "Exactly what it is Woo. Our engagement ceremony will be held in Sapphire hotel Friday night next week. I want you guys to be there. We are making things official from this day onwards. And there's no stopping us now."

 

He look at Myungsoo who was blushing. I can't believe I'm seeing this side of him too. Woohyun turn to me, who was shocked to even utter a word.

 

"Well, I'm glad that my two best friend are engaged now..."

 

Sungyeol's eyes widened and look at Howon who lowered down his gaze.

 

He gently nods and smile.

 

"What?! REALLY? OH MY GOD LEE HOWON! YOU'RE GETTING MARRIED?! WHO'S THE LUCKY GIRL?! OR IS IT A GUY?!"

 

And for the second time, I failed to make my best friends shut up.

 

But Sungyeol suddenly clutch his chest and winced. "Sorry... I suddenly got excited. I forgot about my heart... anyway! I'm so happy for you Howon!"

 

Sungyeol lean to hug me so I return the favor. And when he return to his seat, he take a look at Myungsoo who's still playing with his frappe.

 

Something tells me that this isn't their whole announcement yet. There's something more.

 

But Dongwoo tap the table with his finger while trying to figure everything out about the two. And I know he's good at this so I'm not surprised to hear him say the things running inside my mind now.

 

"You have something more to tell us? And... before anything else, no matter how happy we are, I would like to ask Yeol about your condition. You really have to take that---"

 

"Operation? Yes. I know. That's exactly one of my announcement. But please bear in mind... that I'm not rushing anyone of you guys. But I decided to..."

 

He paused and bit his lower lip as Myungsoo froze on his seat beside Sungyeol. "I decided to undergo the operation after Woo and Gyu... and now, also you and Dongwoo-hyung... and my wedding with Myungsoo."

 

"WHAT?! Wait, how did you even know I'm ending up with Dongwoo? I have yet to tell you who's my lover is."

 

"Yeah! I haven't thought of Dongwoo as Howon's lover either! But what the is this all about?!"

 

I knew it. We will react on this. Woo and I. We eyed Sungyeol with an obvious disbelief. But he's returning the favor with his strong gaze.

 

"I'm serious--"

 

"No! You can't be serious! You are meant to take that operation as soon as possible! We don't want lose you!"

 

Woo pull out his hair as he look at Sungyeol. I wanted to do the same, but I literally froze.

 

Sungyeol smiles and held our hands.

 

"I want to witness everything before I enter that operation room, without knowing if I'll survive or not. Because we all know, that the possibility of me surviving is less than the possibility of me dying--"

 

"Don't you ing say--"

 

"Do this for me. I know this is too much. And I know I'm being selfish, but that's all I want."

 

Myungsoo remained on his seat. So that explains his dejected sad face.

 

"Why are you giving up so early, Yeollie?" Dongwoo asked as he pull me to seat, and I swear I cursed as I sat back because it hurts like .

 

"This is not giving up, hyung. This is me, facing reality. And I want you guys to be ready of the idea of this reality with me."

 

Sungyeol held Myungsoo close as the younger sobs.

 

"I have Myungsoo... I have you guys and my family to return to. Who knows until when I'll hold on to my life with that in mind. I won't ask anyone of you to trust me, because I can't trust myself on this. But all I want is to see everyone happy--"

 

"No. I am not having this." I stood abruptly and I couldn't care less on my hurting. "You'll undergo in that operation. My wedding could wait."

 

And I left them there with Dongwoo behind me.

 

The street turns foggy and blurry suddenly as I tried to hold on with my tears.

 

I can't. The idea of him gone after we all--

 

"Hoya!"

 

I felt a strong pull from my behind and found myself between Dongwoo's arms around me and I can no longer held it back.

 

The pain of losing my best friend. The idea of him gone...

 

It hurts.

 

"Ssshhh... it's okay... it's okay, Hoya. Calm down--"

 

"What if after o-our marriage, he--- he--"

 

"That won't happen.. "

 

"It could! We both know it could! It could happen and I hate myself even more now!"

 

Dongwoo pull away and look at me confusedly. "What do you mean by that Lee Howon?"

 

"If being happy means losing Sungyeol, then I don't want it."

 

I said and freed myself from his grip. I wipe my tears away.

 

"You're kidding... you're talking about breaking up now?"

 

"Breaking the wedding, yes."

 

"What?! Are you kidding?!"

 

"I'm not. I don't want to get married if I were to lose Sungyeol once I am. I don't want i--"

 

" it Lee Howon! The are you saying?! Do you honestly think I'll buy that?! No ing way!"

 

"You don't have to. You just have to--"

 

" you. I gave you all of me, Hoya. Everything. I've waited for years to tell our friends that we're exclusively for each other! There's no way I'm setting you free."

 

I move further and he tried to hug me again but I turn myself around and walk away.

 

If being happy means I get to see Sungyeol's.... I don't even want to think about it. It hurts so much.

 

I don't want it. If us being happy means he'll be okay to leave anytime, then I don't want it.

 

--