Chapter 25: ALL OR NOTHING

If you love me,

For what you see,

Only your eyes would be,

In love with me

If you love me

For what you’ve heard,

Then you would love me

For my words.

If you love

My heart and mind,

Then you love me

For all that I’m

But if you don’t love,

My every flaw

Then you mustn’t love—

Not at all.

Every Saturday, Sandara tries her best to visit her very famous and very fluffy (especially these days) boyfriend. Kwon Jiyong, being thick is delicious as ever, she cannot help but hug him like the big bear that he is.

“You look extra prettier—” he remarked, perhaps it’s because her birth month is coming. A birthday glow or her post-military radiance. Dara was sipping a peppermint tea because the weather is starting to send shivers and could only smile at her boyfriend’s compliment. Sitting across him in the table provided at the privacy of the office of their infantry, Jiyong could smell the faint flowery and fruity scent of hers, that he really liked. He grabbed her hand that was resting earlier on top of the table. Giving her little fingers some squeeze, he smiled as he sees her new nail arts.

“Are you sick?!” he asked after seeing her sniffle. Also, her eyes are deep and droopy. Her cheeks are flushed.

“I might be catching some colds…it’s that season.” Dara softly smiled at him. With his calloused hands he cupped her face, “Omooo. You’re not taking care of yourself…” His worried face is so cute because his cheeks are so chubby. His frowns with the way his pouted his lips looked adorable.

“You look extra cutie these days, Jwiyongie!” that made him blush. She said it with so much adoration with little hints of aegyo although hoarse and she continuously sniffles. She really might be getting sick. That added to the growing concern inside of him. Sandara puts additional care with her stamina but when she catches the flu, she has to be in the hospital. Jiyong will not be constantly by her side to take care of her especially, now that he’s fulfilling an obligation to their country.

“I sleep at 10 pm everyday and exercise, by the end of this year, I’ll show you my abs!” he giggled to mask the growing concern because he knows Dara will call him silly for being paranoid or worse hiss at him because she thinks that he thinks that she’s weak, which is a complete bull.

“Ommo!” she feigned shock, and acted like she’s crying, “You have abs now? Congrats!Omooo!”

“I’m going to cry!!!!” she even fanned her face to add some dramatic effects and it did not fail to make him laugh.

They talked more about the episodes of her on Real Men, “They told me about that one when you let yourself get dragged,” his voice was half-amused but the irate can still be heard.

“That one was cool,” she beamed at him teasingly. He rolled his eyes on her and that made her chuckle, “I just hope your friend who suggested the lightpen can sleep at night knowing that you got dragged…” Jiyong knows Sandara has a bunch of guy friends which is cool…cool…cool…cool…cool…cool…No doubt! No doubt! But he knows and tells her with full confidence that some are just waiting for Sandara to dump him, face flat.

“He has a name….” she whispered but it was loud enough for Jiyong to hear and stir more inside him. He’s getting irater by the second. It was childish, and they have established that jealousy is an ugly and disgusting feeling.

Who are they both kidding? Do they know how beautiful they both are? People will kill to have them as a partner.

“Lord Voldemort has a name, but the wizarding world chose not to say it because,” he quirked an eyebrow up at her.

“Because he killed a lot of wizards and witches, and muggles.”she finished the sentence for him.

“Your friend could kill my heart Sandara…” Whenever Jiyong hears Jaejoong or any other guy friends that she has, a foreboding irrational fit of him is just prancing around the corner. He claims that he can see right through the male species, majority of them fancies his woman.

“Kiko killed my heart too...Jiyong.” she paused when she found his face contorted painfully, “But I can still say her name.”

The conversation was pointless. Then there was silence. Sandara just fumbled on her phone while she leaves Jiyong alone with his thoughts. Times when both tug each others’ happiness out of them like a dementor, they leave each other alone.It only took a couple of minutes before Sandara decided to break the silence, “I don’t know why we’re fighting…But let me just say I love you and if you’re still jealous I’m sorry!”

Jiyong broke into a smile, “Yes. Apologize for being perfect…”

Shaking her head, a thought suddenly crossed her mind, “Heyyyy let me show you something.” She excitedly showed something on her phone, which Jiyong looked at with great interest, “Your birthday party concept this year?!”

She nodded, “So what will you be wearing?! I swear—if you pull that half-parted hair Sajangnim, or anything from his idol days—” Jiyong sniggered because it’s as if she read his mind, “Heyyyy I pulled off worse hairstyles and I still look good!”

The most important thing just dawned on her, “But can you come?!”

He sighed exasperatedly, “Uhm..Sorry babe.” He bit his inner cheeks to stop him from smiling because she can see through him. He lied, he was granted a long-weekend leave because although there are days-off here and there he chose to stay to save it for Sandara.

“Oh.” the disappointment was evident on her face. Well she did not really hide it, “They did not grant it?!” she asked hopeful that it’s just Jiyong being Jiyong, and any seconds he’ll yell, “PSYCHED! Of course, I’ll come!” But there was nothing.

He nodded and looked straight in her eyes, “I’ve used too much…since the surgery.” Her lips were tight, and he almost felt bad for lying to her.

“Eottokeee…” she mumbled while pouting in front of him. She did not say it out loud but having to celebrate her birthday with him through the years has been the greatest gift. His presence was all she needed. Every year wherever she is celebrating when she must blow the candle, having beside him for more years will always be that one wish.

“I wanted you to spend time with my friends…and they wanted to spend time with you too—Gdragon-ssi.”

To be honest Dara and Jiyong may have an army of friends but a lazy Sunday at home, doodling or watching a drama is all they wanted—that’s all they do except for some occasional heat of the moment which is actually not occasional but yah kno. Jiyong did not have much time to accommodate Sandara’s friends too but he knows she’s got more ssen-unnies these days. Dara attracts people in her life that are strong enough to fry his balls if he does something stupid, like Park Bom. That noona went out of her cave when he was the headline of the New Year’s Dispatch Dating news. With that, he’s thankful because everybody loves his woman.

He snickered, “Well..we never really celebrated our birthdays on our real birthdays—especially yours…”

She sighed for he was right and if she’s being honest, she expected too much even though this year he’s got the slimmest chance to be beside her.

Jiyong went over to her side, pulling her closer to him, “Time’s up babe…” he whispered before lifting her chin to give her a kiss, “will I see you next weekend?!”

“I have schedule next week…” she said.

Seeing as how she’s not looking straight at him, “Hey. Why do you look so sad?!”

“Because I miss you—oldie.” He gave her another light kiss on her lips, “I always do too…” he smiled and gave her another set of letters he was able to write for this week. Dara smiled at him and gave him a black notebook, “What is this?!” he asked.

“The journal I kept while I am inside,” she grinned looking all smug. She’s seeing Jiyong looking all flushed, it’s still not occurring to him that she was once an enlisted woman who went through tasks that are as difficult as their usual.

“I wrote to you while I was there, so the penlight was useful.”

He blushed, and he was happy while briefly scanning the pages, “Thank you.” He kissed her forehead, “I’ll read this well…” A knock was heard, an officer signalling them that indeed it is times up. Dara stood up and fixed her bags, she asked Jiyong if he shares the facemasks that she constantly brings him, and the man just rolled his eyes. Mumbled under his breath, “The punks love it…”

With a final bear hug, they said their goodbyes, with Dara being unsure of when she’ll be able to see him again but