Zweiunddreißig

Morning came too soon, and I woke up too early.

But it wasn’t as if I really slept at all last night. Not when the memory of our failure of a plan magnified the dull pain from the bite marks on my neck. And now as I stood before the mirror, my eyes clouded by dark circles and my cheeks so sunken I almost thought I was looking at a skeleton, I gingerly lingered my fingertips on the red, slightly swollen mark on my neck.

It looked disgustingly possessive. As if from now on I’ll be trapped within Jongin’s grasp no matter if I’m away from him physically. The mark that resided on the nape of my neck seemed to act like a cursed talisman…haunting me wherever I go.

At the very thought, goose bumps ran all over my arms as my neck became incredibly itchy and my heart became excruciatingly stuffy. It was as if I was being pressed on all sides by heavy, wet sponge and no matter where I turn, I could not find space to breathe.

In a panic, my breathing quickly became irregular and with a muffled scream as I masked my lips with my hands before the ear-splitting sound came out, I found myself throwing my body against the wall, hoping to find some sort of escape from the violent s and pain my body was feeling.

But no matter how much I screamed into the palm of my hands, no matter how violently I threw my already bruised sides at the hard, marble walls – my heart only grew tighter by each second.

Thump. Thump. Thump. THUMP.

It’s not enough…it’s not enough. The pain on my arms still haven’t overtaken the pain in my heart yet.

Thump. Thump. Thump. THUMP.

S-Someone…someone….please just kill me now. I can’t breathe…I can’t ing breathe-

Thump. Thump. Thump. THUMP-

“-YOO NARI!”

A force dragged my numbed body away from the wall I was ing myself onto, and in my clouded state of mind, I fell limply into the arms of the man – though my breathing still came in painful, haggard gasps as I struggled to fight for air.

“N-Nari, calm down. Take deep breaths…take deep breaths…”

The voice was faint to my ears as my blurred vision and dizzy mind tried to take in the man’s words. The sides of my face was completely numb, and my body had gone so stiff I could not move it at all…my heart was still squeezing tight, and I could barely feel my heart beating.

“It’s okay, it’s okay…don’t panic…”

With each soothing syllable, I forced myself to calm down. Closing my eyes, I zoned out as I tried to hear the sound of my heart beating again.

I could not tell how long I stayed with my eyes closed, but by the time I felt I had completely calmed down, I was so exhausted I could barely open them.

“Nari,” Now, in a much clearer state of mind, I recognized the voice as Jongin’s. His voice was trembling slightly and I could feel his strong arms shaking like a frightened kid, “A-Are you okay?”

Keeping my eyes closed, I didn’t even have the energy to nod my head. I felt so drained out of energy, and my numb arms had now begun to throb in pain that intensified by each second. Barely opening my eyes, I stared at the wall in front of me blankly for a second before shock hit me.

For dripping down the white marble walls – was blood.

With a newly frightened mind, I glanced down slowly at my body…to find that my clothes were ripped and blood was seeping out of the cuts that scattered all over my arm. Jongin’s arms were stained with my blood, and as I lifted my head to look into his face, I realised with mild surprise how petrified and scared he looked. 

There were long minutes of pause as I glanced away from his face and sat lifelessly in his embrace. When Jongin finally spoke, it came out as a hushed whisper.

“Nari,” Jongin seemed incredibly shaken, “I’m sorry.”

Turning my head around, I stared at Jongin with slight confusion.

Sorry?

Sorry about what?

For ruining my life? For taking Sehun away from me? For the break down I just had?

Or has he finally figured out that it would be best for us both if we never get married?

As if reading my mind, Jongin continued to speak without waiting for a reply from me.

“Sorry Nari,”

What Jongin said next made me so angry I managed to find strength to immediately push him away from me and storm away from his presence.

“I’m sorry that you’ll still have to marry me next week.”

To be honest, I really shouldn’t be out here right now.

Not when my arm had turned an ugly colour of blueish-purple and when I felt so exhausted I could die.

But with my heart scorching with anger and disappointment, I needed an answer.

I needed an answer right now, and I need it from Park Chanyeol.

“Hey, what’s up?”

Glancing up from the table, I saw Chanyeol striding inside the coffee shop with one hand in his pocket and the other waving cheerfully at me.

Too cheerful when our plan had just failed miserably yesterday night.

Not returning his bright acknowledgement, I remained stoic and tried not to glare too hard at him as he sat down on the chair opposite to me. The second he sat down, I wasted no more time and got straight to the point.

“How did Jongin know about our plan.”

My words came out more as a statement than a question, but Chanyeol seemed unaffected by my harsh tone and instead leaned back against the chair, as composed as ever.

“He knew a long time ago,” Chanyeol chuckled – as if this was meant to be funny, “Please, he knew literally a day after we planned out the plan.”

My blood boiling in my veins, I tried hard not to burs