I follow in your shadow
I make a phone call
I become thrilled at the sound of your shaking breath
My heart runs after your increasingly quick steps
I think I’ll go crazy
The long night gets darker
Under the dead streetlamp in front of your house
I’m watching you through the crack in your window
Until the night ends
Come on and find me
You keep playing a suffocating game of hide-and-seek with me
You, you, you
You’re inseparable from me.

 

— Song Jieun ft Bang Yongguk's Going Crazy.

 

 

---

 

Rain. It was going to rain soon; Jonghoon could smell the dampness in the air as he walked down the darkened street of Seoul. He glanced automatically at the sky as lightning flashed in the distance and just as he thought, tiny droplets started to pelt down on the earth and he was completely drenched by the time he reached the hotel he spotted before in the distance. After checking in, he took a long shower, just letting the hot water run above his head as he filled his thoughts of what he should do. Where he should go next. Just when he thought he was about to get to her, somehow he managed to end right back up at square one.

 

 

It was like she purposely erased all the evidence of her trails.

Of her existence.

 

 

And he blamed himself for that. He sighed.  He was too stupid to let her go once again, too cowardly to tell her the truth. But he was doing it for her, to protect her from harm and getting hurt. But yet you hurt her in the process. Tear stung his eyes as he thought of how much she had suffered, how much he was involved for inflicting the sorrow on her and how much it affected her colours which  were barely seen anymore. Colourful was the only word to describe Hyosung. She's green and blue and yellow and purple everywhere, full of life and happiness.

 

 

But that was all gone now; he witnessed it himself as her colour slowly diminished, tainted with selfishness of people around her, yet he did nothing to stop it. And though she didn't give him eyes that are full of judgment or longing, she showed him something so much worse . Eyes of emptiness – the light was no longer there and only darkness of the pain and suffering were left.

 

 

“I am a big .” His forehead against the tile as his body trembled. “I don‘t deserve to see your colours. I don‘t deserve you.” He stood that way for the longest time before he got out of the bathroom and dried himself, sat at the bed’s edge and hung his head in low. His thoughts were a huge mess.

 

 

A loud ring shook him out of his reverie but he chose to stare at his phone on the table and let it rang a couple more before it went dead, and he continued to stare out absent minded. His phone rang again, and after countless of annoying rings, he grunted and picked it up.

 

 

“What?” He barked.

 

 

“Where are you?” Jonghoon gritted his teeth at the sound of his voice. How the did he get my number?

 

 

“None of your business.” He snapped and was about to hang up the phone but the mention of her name stopped him from doing so.

 

 

“I know where Hyosung is but we don’t have time to talk over the phone. I just landed at Gimpo Airport and I need to meet you now. We need to fly to Mokpo today.” Kikwang sounded breathless. And terrified.

 

 

“What are you talking about ...?” He immediately stood and faced the window, his heart pumped a little faster than just now.

 

 

“Just tell me where you are!” Kikwang snapped back at him and Jonghoon noted he was serious at the desperate tone of his voice.

 

 

“Give me half an hour and I’ll meet you at the airport.” Jonghoon hung up and threw his phone aside. He practically threw every clothes in, dressed up, checked out and made his way to the airport. Sure enough, he arrived exactly on time and he redialed Kikwang’s number. He rushed to Kikwang’s meet up point and found him pacing back and forth restlessly at the private lounge, his eyes never leaving the watch on his wrist.

 

 

“You‘re late.” He hissed and pulled Jonghoon towards the sofa.

 

 

“Oh I’m sorry I don’t own a superpower to super-speed.” Jonghoon replied dryly and tugged free his hand. “This better be really important or I’ll beat you up.”

 

 

“Sakura is after Hyosung.” Kikwang interjected, ignoring his threat completely.

 

 

“What …?” Jonghoon words couldn’t came up more as he was baffled and confused over what Kikwang just said.

 

 

“Apparently Min knew where Hyosung is and she leaked the information to Sakura,” Kikwang frowned, the creases on his forehead barely invisible. Jonghoon saw a reflection of him in Kikwang; puffy eyes with dark circles and he looked way thinner than he remembered. Had he been worrying that much about her...?

 

 

“Have you inform the police?” Jonghoon finally asked.

 

 

“You think the authority would want to meddle with something that hasn’t happen?” Kikwang replied sardonically and he saw anger flared inside his eyes. Before he knew it, Kikwang pounced on him and fisted his collar. Surprised at Kikwang’s action, he stayed frozen under him. “Why didn’t anyone tell me about this? Why don’t you tell me about it?!”

 

 

This . He then chuckled before he grabbed Kikwang’s hands and pulled it off him, pushed him aside and gave him a punch in the face that he had been longing to. It was his turn to bunch Kikwang’s collars and glared down at him, his anger seethed.

 

 

“ing . You’re blaming me for this? For sake, all this happened because of you! If you didn’t ing hurt her, she wouldn’t have to be in Japan! I wouldn’t have to meet her! She wouldn’t have to meet Sakura! All this wouldn’t have happen! It shouldn’t happen!” His fist slammed only inches away from Kikwang’s face, and he felt his whole body trembled so badly as angry tear started forming. “She shouldn’t suffer … she don’t deserve all this … You don’t deserve her.” He glared into Kikwang’s eyes long enough before releasing him and stood far enough to regulate his breathing and messed up mind.

 

 

Kikwang stay glued at where he was and same goes to Jonghoon before Kikwang announced they need to book the plane ticket, and they both stay mute throughout the journey to Mokpo. Jonghoon couldn’t care less. He felt good releasing the jarred up anger and disappointment and all he cared about then was to find Hyosung before Sakura do.

 

 

Please dear God, protect them.

I beg of you.

 

 

 

 

 

---

 

The breath of the wind left a cooling effect on their skins, a well-balanced counterpart to the steaming ddubboki infront of them. Eating out had been their regular routine since they got here, seeing that Hyosung barely had the time to cook after work.

 

 

“Daehyun, do you need anything else?” She asked and adjusted him on her back as they made their way home. Yeap, he is definitely putting on weight, a smile creased up her face.

 

 

“No. We go home noona. Noona tired, right?” His sleepy voice right rung next to her ear, he then yawned and rested his head upon her shoulder.

 

 

“Oh? Noona tired or Daehyun is?” She chuckled when she heard his snoring just a moment later. Her steps slowed down to a brisk walk instantly and decided to just enjoy the soothing feel of the breeze on her skin. The night was indeed beautiful; her source of tranquility. She was too preoccupied with thoughts, not realizing that she was walking aimlessly into the night.

 

 

Suddenly rough hands grabbed her from behind and pulled her into the dark alley. She gasped aloud as the stranger pulled Daehyun off her back and saw a metal blade placed onto his neck. Before he could struggle, the stranger scoffed something on Daehyun and he passed out instantly, leaving Hyosung speechless and trembling badly as she stay rooted to the spot.

 

 

“Don’t make any sound or this little brat will get hurt,” His gruff voice whispered across her, pressing down the knife deeper into Daehyun’s neck.

 

 

“Don’t! Please don’t hurt him, please don’t! I-I’ll do whatever you want, j-just don’t hurt my brother. Please .....” She was almost hysterical when she saw blood trickled down her brother’s neck, tears sprung out of her eyes freely now.

 

 

“Good girl.” Without waiting, he ushered her in front of him and lead her deeper into the dark alley. She had no idea where they were nor did she care as she was too busy contemplating on escaping without Daehyun getting hurt but before she knew it, she felt a strong blow to her head. Stars exploded in her eyes, her head snapped back before she fell onto the cold ground, with her vision slowly getting blurry.

 

 

“Sweet dreams, my friend.” A familiar voice whispered cynically next to her ear before she faded out to complete darkness.

 

 

Sakura.

 

 

 

 

 

---

 

 

 

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

 

 

Hello to all my lovely readers, honest to God, I REALLY MISS YOU GUYS! I am so sorry for the lack of updates since forever. I really truely am! Thank you so much for still putting your faith and loyalty in me, because it really does help to boost my enthusiasm to update this as soon as I could get my hands on it. Thank you so much! SOBS.

 

 

So much have been going on for the past two months! I've been spazzing over BAP non-stop and crying day + night (yes, exaggerating) waiting for SECRET's comeback ... which is in September! OHMYGOODNESS I CAN'T FREAKING WAAAAAAAAAAAAAIT! 

 

 

Okay, that is all for now. Sorry if it is short and lifeless. I just want to let you guys know that I'm still breathing and alive T_T

 

Nights!

<3