“Hey,” a soft voice called out.

Myungsoo had shut himself inside his house for four days, today being the fifth. Since the weather was a little bit nicer, sun was out and the birds were chirping, he decided to take a walk out. The soft grass were calling out to him so laid on them and closed his eyes, the world feel so much better from this point of view.

“S-Sungyeol…” he opened his eyes and found the boy he had been actively avoiding sitting beside him, “What are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be in class? School’s not out yet.”

The taller boy raised an eyebrow at him, “I should be asking you the same thing.”

A moment of silence passed by them until they both opened their mouth, “I skipped.” And laughed because it was funny, same answer at the same time? It was funny so they both laughed, the cheery sound circling around them. They could’ve been friends.

“I haven’t gone to school for days,” Myungsoo explained as he pushed himself up and sat, “Locked myself up inside my room. I had to do some thinking but being cooped up inside the four walls of my place wasn’t exactly of help so I decided to come out today and well… here we are.” He watched the other boy from the corner of his eye as he focused his face to face front. Sungyeol really was good-looking.

“I haven’t gone to school as well,” Sungyeol chuckled to himself as he stretched his arms and fell on the grass, “My grandfather would kill me, I skipped cleaning the gym for a week too.” And he closed his eyes as if welcoming sleep.

There was a strong urge inside Myungsoo’s brain to touch the other boy but he held his hand in. Sungyeol was pretty even if he would deny that, he was good-looking even if he’s a boy or if he becomes a girl. This was why Myungsoo felt a hundred times guilty because Sungyeol, even if he was a boy, was fragile and did not deserve any of the crap that was forced upon him.

“Stop blaming yourself,” Myungsoo almost flinched when he heard Sungyeol speak up, “You’re thinking that you’re at fault, aren’t you? Stop blaming yourself, Myungsoo. I came over here to speak to you about it as well.”

Myungsoo felt his arm being pulled down and he felt himself fall on the grass once again, side by side with Sungyeol. His view was focused on the clouds hanging above them but every movement of the boy beside him was visible to his eyes, it was as if he didn’t want him gone from his view.

“I will talk and you will shut up, got that?” For a moment, Myungsoo had forgotten who he was talking to but this reminded him that this was Sungyeol—sharp-tongued Sungyeol and no one else. “I’m going to do the talking and you’re going to do the listening, you can have your turn later.”

He felt himself nod, untrusting his own voice.

“I love you,” Myungsoo cannot ignore the fact that it was still in present tense and he felt even the guiltier (if that was possible). “I love you ever since I saw you when you entered our classroom. A strange attraction at first that turned to obsession that turned to full-fledge feelings. You probably never noticed me because you were always at your own world.”

Myungsoo had to disagree with that because he had known of Sungyeol’s existence from the start. It was not like how Sungyeol saw of his but no one can really not notice Sungyeol, he was that cheery and energetic boy who brings smiles to everyone’s face. He can be a real brat and all but he was good-natured, he never meant real harm so nobody could hate him, Myungsoo included.

“When you went off that day on our graduation, I followed you.” Sungyeol bit his lip as if he didn’t want to admit this but he has to so he lets go seconds after. “I admit, I was somehow a stalker but I swear it’s because I felt like something was about to go wrong so I followed you. It was raining that day and I brought out my umbrella, ready to lend it to you when you went missing.”

If onlys are hanging in Myungsoo’s tongue but he held it in. He didn’t want to think of those if onlys that would only make this harder for him. There was only one if only that he thinks would’ve made the biggest difference. If only I waited for Sungyeol to take out the umbrella… who knows what could’ve happened after that?

“You disappeared from my sight and I went looking for you like frantic,” he saw the taller boy grin again as if proud for himself. “I felt like something was wrong so I went looking and looking until… until I heard your voice screaming. It was faint, if I didn’t know it was yours, I would’ve never gone to the alley. You have to know that this was all because I love you, okay?”

Hearing all these felt so much painful than imagining it from his point of view. If Sungyeol didn’t love him, he would’ve never followed him and would’ve never heard his faint voice. To the passer bys that day, his voice was merely an imagination but to Sungyeol, it was loud enough to check.

“Don’t think I’m blaming you.” Sungyeol poked his cheek and that’s when Myungsoo realized that the taller boy was on his side and facing him. “I saved you that day because I love you. Ev