The moment when i saw chanyeol was there probably the biggest mistake i’ve done this year. Because of that, i couldn’t forget about him.

         everything in my mind was about him. after all my i’ve done to myself, why did he have to come again?

          i met minah again, of course. I missed her so much. We hang out together to everyplace we’ve been there together.

        Too bad that i had to go back to seoul, where now i belong.

         Now i was a freshman in a university. I’ll began a new life, and probably there will be another guy like chanyeol.

          I just wanted to live without having anyone in my heart, it seems like very easy to live. When i was about to stepped another step to get out from the building – it was already time to go home – a girl took my hand and put the bracelet i knew.

         It was chanyeol’s bracelet.

         “don’t took it off again! it suits well, you know” it was seolhyun! She smiled to me and then walked away. i didn’t know that she was in seoul, and how could she knew about the bracelate?

         I couldn’t see her again since she already gone in the middle of the students.

         "keep this, it is for you” kyungsoo gave me a box that had rotten flower in it, it was the rose from chanyeol.

          He smiled and walked away with himchan, what the that was happening here. why did suddenly everyone in my highschool came?

         Then, a guy and a girl came to me, “did you still cut yourself again? i can’t believe it” jongdae pushed my head with his finger before he and minah walked away, giggled like crazy.

          I ran away from the building since i knew there was something wrong. Am i dreaming? I hope so.

          I wasn’t focus so i bumped into someone. I said, “i’m so sorry!” i looked at that guy and he seemed like somehow familiar to me.

          he smiled and told me that he was okay.

          He said, “i’m lee jinki, and you are?”

          “[Y/N], i’ve seen you before”

          “yeah, we go to the same school, you know, the president of the school council? It suprised me since you didn’t know me when everyone knew about me”

          “i’m not a social girl, gotta go now” i walked away from him and tried to find my car but i couldn’t find it.

          i tried to be calm since i was so shocked. Within a few minutes, i finally could find my car and went back home safely.

           I entered into my room and threw my bag somewhere. I didn't know what was going on in this world but I knew that this wasn't right, how could it be?

         My entire past suddenly came seemed like followed me. I didn't mind if they decide to go to college there same with me, but I would strongly object if Chanyeol would be there as well.

          He was enough to make me mad.

          "Miss, there's someone that want to see you" said one of the staff there. I sighed, who's else after jongdae and kyungsoo? I went into the monitor room to see who was coming visited me.

          and it made me surprised.

          "C-Chanyeol ......." I didn't know what I had to do. Should I run away and didn't see him or should I go there and see him?

        then what should I say? if I was still in love with him? It was impossible. but even more strange, what was he doing here when he already said that he hated me?

        I got out of room monitor and went to the high gate within quite far from the main house. Chanyeol tried to smiled at me, but I just gave him a look which he used to gave me.

        that hatred gaze.

         "annyeong, [Y / N]"

          I asked, "what are you here for? want to explain how much you hate me?"

          "Can we talk for a minute?"

          "are we laughing now? cause it seems like we're already talking"

          "okay, I was wrong. I was stupid. I can't explain why did I said that stuff to you. I just felt shocked, knowing that the girl who has always been there by my side turned out to like me all this time. and worse, I was very often to hurt her. when you were gone, I realized all of that. I'm aware of your role in my life, friends in every moment. can you forgive me??"

          Before i could answer him, suddenly there was a car that went towards us. It was my dad. I sighed and told chanyeol to go away since my dad was here.

         “why? It’s been a long time since the last time i met him” he said with a smile while i was rolling my eyes.

          “chanyeol?” my dad smiled happily when he saw him. i sighed and decided to went back home but then my dad stopping me.

        i thought that he might forget about what have he done to me but my dad was the type of person that was being too nice.

         He might thought that chanyeol would change, and i believed that he still such a bastard. “what?”

         “take chanyeol around the house, he’s our visitor!” he said. i told him that chanyeol would be gone after this, he must have college in jeolla-do. “i’m moving here for college”

         I screamed so loud, “BUT WHY”

          “you don’t like it?”

          “yeah i don’t like it! just go back okay, i’m moving here it was also because of you. now what do you want from me? wanted me to go out from this planet just because of you?”

          “so you still haven’t forget about me?”

          “how can i forget about you, stupid . You’re my first love and it couldn’t be change even though i have a husband one day. just go away okay, go away if you intend to hurt me someday. Go somewhere where i couldn’t see you to flirt with minah or some other you have” i ran away from them and got into my room as fast as i could.

         It used to be so hard to express how i felt towards him, but it was getting easier. I didn’t know what i felt towards him right now but i knew that it was still hurt as hell whenever i saw right into his eyes.

          It really amazes me that someone like chanyeol could hurt me like this.

         because uncle baekhyun's house was quite close to our house, I decided to went to his house. I went to my uncle's house using a car bought for my father, although I only rarely use it.

        when i got there, I was greeted by Baekhyun uncle who was sitting on the porch. He seemed surprised and pleased for my arrival.

         "[Y/N]!" he said when he saw me