That night i had a dream. A sad dream. I would rather call it a nightmare. 

It was about Kai. About us breaking up. I know that day is going to come one day, just not sure how fast it is. I of course hope it won't come. But I know it will. From now on, every moment with him is very precious. I looked forward to seeing him everytime. Everytime we hugged, it was much more warm and tight, because soon, we will have to let go of each other. Everytime we kissed, it was much deeper and meaningful, because every single time could be our last. Everytime we see each other, we will smile more, smile our most genuine smile, to hide the fear in us. 

I made a mistake once. I don't want to regret again. The day I left him, it was full of guilt and regrets. If I could turn back time, I would have made the ending happier at least. That is why with Kai now, I can't afford to make another mistake and cause hurt to both of us. I should be the one who get hurts. Not Kai. Not him. Not anyone else. But me. 

"What are you thinking about?" His voice startled me. 

"Someone..." 

"him?" 

"and y0u...." I'm always honest with him. I don't want to hide anything from him. 

"Talk to me if you need to alright?" He backhugged me. Tightly. I feel a prick in my heart. 

"Jongin ah....what if she comes back?" 

"her? Never thought about it... I don't think she even remembers me..."

"jinjja? Does she not like you?" 

"I have no idea...I never confessed...which is my regret. I should have told her, even if she may not like me back. Rather than now, when I don't even know if i'll see her again..." 

"If i see him again, I think he will hate me...but i would tell him that I love him...still..." 

"Is he as handsome as me?" 

"keke...hmm....yes..maybe more..." Kai, you never fail to make me smile... what am i going to do without you? 

"jinjja? I'm so sad now..." He pouted. I smiled even more. 

"He's tall like you...and when he smiles, I just melt...but I melt when you smile too.." 

"What if you have to choose between me and him?" Now that is a tricky question. I never thought of it before. Because I never thought of meeting him again. Even if we do, he probably hates me to the core. We will never get back together. 

"None...because no matter what, me, you or him, can't be together...." 

"Na~ no matter what I'll be right here for you, always remember that ok? I love you forever..." 

"arasso...Nado...what about you?" 

"none too..." 

"hehe...actually, I don't know his name... at all... We never told each other our real name.." 

"I don't know her name too...I only called her Byeol...because she reminds me of the beautiful stars in the sky, just like you..." Byeol? hmm...

"why are we so similar? are you my twin perhaps?" 

"Because I'm in your heart~" 

"Aigoo..such a sweettalker..." 

"Don't you like it huh?" He started tickling me. And we ran around the house. Like little kids playing. It reminded me of him too. 

Kai's POV

That night, I received a text from my father. 

He asked me to go back as soon as possible and go out with that girl he introduced to me the other time. He knows I'm with Haena, which is probably why he planned all these. I don't want him to get involved in us. I already told him I would settle this by myself. He probably doesn't trust me. I don't trust myself too actually. How am I going to end this with Haena, although we both are mentally prepared from the start. 

When Haena suddenly asked me about her, I was kind of stunned. From the first day we known each other, we only know about their existence but we never actually talked about him and her. But I am willing to be honest with her. Whatever she wants to know I will answer them. 

But honestly, I never thought about that question. What if she comes back? What will I do if i get to meet her again? I would probably tell her that I love her. But I don't know how to choose between Byeol and Haena. Both are the love of my life. Both I don't want to lose. But I know it is impossible for us to stay together forever. And it will be impossible for me to be with Byeol as well. 

Why must my life be like this... Why can't i choose....