Pain in the Heart

She is not my dongsaeng

“These are all the money I had left from black mailing CEO Baek and Gary Ssi.” En Na placed a few thousand Won on the table.

Ji Hyo looked at the dongsaeng who is now sitting opposite her in Baek Chang Ju’s office. This dongsaeng whom she had once trusted and doted is not the old En Na any more. En Na used to look young and cheerful. She now looked troubled. Her skin and her hair became dull. There is no color on her face.

“En Na, give up on Kao. He is not worth your efforts.” Ji Hyo said.

“Take this money and go back to your hometown. With this money, you can open a minimart with your mother, and life would be good for you both.” Ji Hyo put a cheque on the table.

“Why should I go?” En Na looked up from the table.

“EN Na, your reputation in the industry is bad. No one will recruit you anymore. Go back to your home town and start as a new person again.” Ji Hyo tried to talk some sense into En Na.

“Song Ji Hyo, I am so jealous of you.” En Na suddenly blurt out her words. Ji Hyo looked at En Na blankly.

“You are pretty and successful. You have men who are willing to help you with their money. One even offer to trade his restaurant with me for your fake video. These men are so stupid.” En Na laughed.

“Trade his restaurant? Gary? Kang Gary?” Ji Hyo whispered softly in her heart.

“En Na, you have no choice. We had already informed all the reporters that the video you are holding is fake. C-JES had made a police report also. Even if you release the video on the internet, people can easily tell that the video is fake. Tomorrow morning, my guys will you back to your home town. You can always come back to Seoul. But like what Ji Hyo says, no one from this industry or even other related industries will take you. You did a bad name for yourself.” Baek Chang Ju said.

En Na was sent back to her hometown the next day. Though Ji Hyo had hated En Na for what she has done to her, Ji Hyo still wanted En Na to turn over a new leave. She went to the bus depot to farewell En Na. Knowing Ji Hyo, Baek Chang Ju went to Ji Hyo’s apartment early in the morning to drive her to the bus depot.

“CEO Baek, how did you know that I will be going to the depot.” Ji Hyo asked.

“Ji Hyo, I knew you.” Baek Chang Ju smiled.

“Thank you. I appreciate your kindness.” Ji Hyo smiled back showing her gratitude.

"Ji Hyo, as long as you can forgive me. I will and I can do anything for you." Baek Chang Ju held on to Ji Hyo's hands.

Ji Hyo pulled her hands out from Baek Chang Ju's. "CEO Baek, I have a boyfriend. His name is Kang Gary, you knew him too, don't you?" 

"CEO Baek, shall we get going?" Ji Hyo asked, avoiding any eye contact with Baek Chang Ju,

Baek Chang Ju nodded. "Take it slowly. Pehaps after this incident with En Na, we will start to get closer." Baek Chang Ju sighed.


Gary stared hard at the backs of both Ji Hyo and Baek Chang Ju. The couple had not spoken to each other for 4 full days. Gary tried to message Ji Hyo. Ji Hyo initially replied asking Gary to be patient and finally told Gary that she will call her after she is done with En Na.

Gary decided to check out on Ji Hyo. He was worried that Ji Hyo, being soft hearted, would continue to get nonsense from En Na. At the same time, Gary is also concern that Baek Chang Ju would do something bad and illegal to En Na, dragging Ji Hyo into the troubled waters. After all Baek Chang Ju used to be a gangster.

Gary secretly followed behind Baek Chang Ju’s car to the bus depot. His heart soon sank into the deep regret and frustration.

“Why am I so stubborn? Why did I want to follow them here?” Gary buried his head on the steering wheels. His heart felt shuttered. Ji Hyo was hugging Baek Chang Ju. Baek Chang Ju was wiping off the tears on her face.


 Ji Hyo tears as she witness En Na boarding the coach. Before boarding the coach,  En Na shove the cheque that Ji Hyo gave her, back into her hands.

“I don’t need your mercy. I don’t need your money either.” En Na stormed her way to the bus with Baek Chang Ju’s men at her sides.

“En Na. Are you mad at me?” Ji Hyo asked. She was puzzled. She had tried to help En Na as much as possible but En Na ended up blaming her on what she was today.

“Song Ji Hyo, yes. I hated you. You are not helping me nor Kao. Instead you asked Baek to send me back to my hometown. What can I do in my hometown? You ruined me. You ruined my life with Kao.” En Na turned around and shouted.

Ji Hyo cried. Her body shook as tears gushed through her eyes and rolled down her cheeks. Baek Chang Ju held her by her shoulders and combed her back to comfort her. Finally hugging her into his embrace to let her cry all she could.

Though Gary did witness Ji Hyo exchanging words with En Na, he was too far away to hear what they had said. Gary could only focus on the hug between Ji Hyo and Baek Chang Ju. Gary drove away sadly.


Perhaps she was crying too much, went dry and she lost her voice. Finally ended up with a flu. Though feeling sick, Ji Hyo missed Gary awfully. She tried to call Gary at his studio but Gil told her that Gary went on a vacation at Jeju. Since Tae Han had applied sick leave for Ji Hyo, Ji Hyo decided to visit Gary at Jeju. To give him a surprise, to apologise and to return the money that En Na had taken from Gary.

It took Ji Hyo quite an amount of time to locate the villa that Gary was staying. By the time Ji Hyo found the villa, the sun had set. Ji Hyo knocked on the doors of the villa but no one answers the door. Ji Hyo tried to walk around the villa to see if there are any other entrances to the house. She was startled to see Gary lying on the bench in the garden, one hand holding to a beer bottle while the other to a cigar, puffing away.

“Gary hyung, why get upset over a woman. With your charm, you can get any girl you want.” It was Simon D who was talking.

“Hyung, you had done enough for her. You gave money to that dongsaeng of hers. You waited for her to explain but she never instead she weeps in the arms of her ex boyfriend! Who knows, perhaps you are now the ex boyfriend.” Another guy, whom Ji Hyo recognized as Gary’s hip hop crew but couldn’t remember his name.

“Woman who are not loyal to her man, not worth your love.” Simon D puffed his cigar.

“Are they talking about me?” Ji Hyo stared at the men blankly behind the trees. Though she was not inside the house yet, the night was quiet. Quiet enough for her to hear what the men were talking about.

Gary turned to his sides. He could feel his eyes getting hot. As he closed his eyes, the scenes of Baek Chang Ju forcing himself on Ji Hyo (En Na showed him the real video after Gary promised to give her more money), Ji Hyo smiling at Baek Chang Ju and crying into his arms flooded Gary’s mind and memories.

“So painful…is so painful…love is so painful.” Gary screamed silently in his heart. He tried to hold back the tears in his eyes.

“YES! FORGET about those WOMEN who BETRAYS! SONG JI HYO, you you......you BETRAYED ME. You not WORTH my LOVE!” Gary suddenly sat up. He gulped down his beer, almost choking himself.

“Oppa….” Ji Hyo got concerned as she sees Gary getting choked and vomited the beer on the grass.

“Hyung, let’s get dinner.” Simon D dragged Gary into the villa.

Ji Hyo sobbed soundlessly behind the trees.

“To Kang Gary, I am a woman who betrays. I am a un-loyal woman. How could he says that? Does he knows how much I went through for what En Na had done? Why couldn’t he understands and sympathized with me?” Ji Hyo struggled her way back to the main road. As her vision was blurred by her own tears, she tripped over a stone and sprained her ankle. She limped her way back to the main road.

“No cabs. ! Why am I so unluckily?” Ji Hyo cursed.

Ji Hyo limped slowly along the road. The cold winds made her heart colder. Her ankle was swollen but it was her heart that was screaming in pain. Her tears couldn’t stopped, soon her eyes were sore.

“What the Hell! Is it going to start raining soon?” The sky started to drizzle. Ji Hyo was lucky to hop onto an old couple’s lawn cart. The old couple gave her a rain coat before the storm caught up with them

“Young lady, is very dangerous for you to walk alone.” The ajumma helped Ji Hyo to get into her rain coat. Ji Hyo stayed at the old couple’s small Hanok for the night. Ji Hyo was glad that the storm came with thunder and lightings. She could cry her heart out, drowning her cries in the thunder and loud winds.


“You mean Ji Hyo came for me at Jeju last night?” Gary coudn’t believe his ears when Tae Han called him on his mobile phone to check on Ji Hyo since the news had reported that minor damages were done to some villages in Jeju due to the storm last night.

“But I did not see her at all.” Gary started to panic when he couldn’t get through Ji Hyo’s mobile.

“Could it be something happened to her?” Gary and Simon D went out searching for Ji Hyo. It was till the early afternoons that Tae Han called and said Ji Hyo had returned to her apartment in Seoul.

“Is Ji Hyo ok? Did she really come to Jeju?” Gary was still worried.

“Gary Ssi, I think she came to Jeju. I saw her boarding pass. But am not sure if she is OK. She is limping on her feet and her eyes looked puffy and red. I also want to know what happened.” Tae Han said angrily.

Running Man filming was postponed due to Ji Hyo’s conditions. A sprained ankle, a high fever, a running nose plus a bad throat. Gary tried to visit Ji Hyo at her apartment but she was in deep sleep. He had no chance to talk to her. What made him more frustrated was that Baek Chang Ju was there too.  

Seems Baek Chang Ju had made himself at home at Ji Hyo’s apartment, Gary was just a guest. Gary was ‘invited’ to come again the next day when the night is getting late. When Gary came back the next day, Baek Chang Ju said that Ji Hyo was not ‘fit’ to see any visitors.

“Stress! What happened to Ji Hyo that day when she came to Jeju. Why didn’t she find me at the villa, Gil said she has the address. And what is this Baek Chang Ju doing in Ji Hyo’s apartment? Am I still her boyfriend?” Tons of questions filled Gary’s mind. All he wants now is to talk to Ji Hyo.

“She is sick. Kang Gary, be patient.” Gary kept telling himself as days passed by.

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MbenzB #1
Chapter 5: Not Ha Dong. He is Dong Hoon
Ha is his surname.

just Dong Hoon
isthemoon #2
Chapter 28: I can't believe that I Am reading this story again.
melovestage #3
Chapter 41: Binge read cos I was MC deprived lately.... Great story author nim!! I see you keep mentioning Singapore tho
mctanty #4
Chapter 40: Love u' r story! Thanks for making this kind of story,keep writing!
sky_splitz #5
Chapter 41: I love your stories. Thank you fir your works author-nim
S7V793 #6
Chapter 41: always support you authornim, keep writing!!!!
p.s. you can write oneshot stories or you can try to write the M rate fic :3 this just purely my suggestion!!!! FIGHTING
prettychim #7
Chapter 41: I love to read ur story..do write more.
meloninocturnes #8
Chapter 41: your monday couple stories are really creative and well done! ^.^ if you're having trouble coming up with more ideas, you could focus on a build-up of their relationship in the next story?
mikanMD #9
Chapter 41: Thank you for wonderful stories
mikanMD #10
Chapter 39: Woahh mongji wa the one who asked xD