I had no clue how I did it. I managed to go through the last few days of school with Kai not speaking to me, or rather I avoided him. I even got Chanyeol to swap places with me during English- the guy was reluctant but he gave in. But did it stop Kai? Nope. During lunch, he'd catch me in my usual room, sometimes with Chanyeol, somtimes I'd be alone but I excused myself to the toilets.

I was not a fool to not know that I was playing the denial game with myself. I'm trying to avoid all communications with him because of what happened between us that monday. And it was clear that my heart was telling me that I was, in fact, attracted to him but in my mind... it was just a recurring no. Plus, avoiding was good- it would stop me from falling into a deep pool of... Kai.

I had also given up on my glasses. My cover was blown that day. But what changed? Absolutely nothing. Except for the tiny detail that they would throw me dirty glares outside of school when they recognised me; a few side comments when they walked past. But it was all cool. Nothing that I wasn't used to.

Being the Christmas holiday, Suho decided to close the shop early. And being the Christmas holiday, the shop had managed to garner double the customers, which meant double the profit, which also meant a bonus for Christmas. Not like Suho needed any of it.

But with the bonus, he dropped me off to the nearest shopping centre so that I could do some Christmas shopping. Muttering something about being busy with wrapping presents that's why he couldn't accompany me. However, the constant beeping of his phone, told me he had someone else to accompany. I didn't know why I allowed him to take me because the reality was I was never going to spend my bonus on shopping for Christmas. What was the use? I had no one to give to... Nothing to receive... No one to celebrate with. It was almost the same for every occassion: New Years, my birthday. And it had been that way for three years. 

And being cooped up in the gigantic mall that was filled with enthusiastic shoppers didn't help at all. A certain father and daughter caught my eye. I remebered those moments when my father would take me out shopping. He would refuse to buy me the most expensive dress or toys for the fear of spoiling me. Instead he showered me with his knowledge and passion for music, which through the years I had learned to love. 

Feeling guilty, that I may have caused Suho to waste his gas by driving me all the way, I chose to stay for a few more hours- maybe I would find something I liked. 

"Find something you liked?"

I swiftly swivelled to the person playing games with me. I didn't know why I was so surprised to see who it was, when my brain was clearly flashing red for a no-go warning. And indeed, I did find something I liked. But who would be such a fool to admit that?

My mind, unable to find the correct words, lead my body to turn back around and walk away. But why didn't I run? Was I expecting him to chase after me? Yes. My thoughts were answered when I felt a grasp on my wrist. I couldn't turn around.

"Yah, no one kisses me and avoids me like nothing happened."

He got me. The nerve of this guy! I circled around, certain that I whipped him on the face with my hair but I was not in the mood. 

"I did not kiss you." My eyes widened, at how close we were- I underestimated my turn.

"Who was on top?" He smirked