The ride back home in the taxi felt so much longer than the 15 minutes it actually took.
I could've totally walked but Mark had already flagged down a taxi before I even left the hospital.
We didn't really talk the entire ride there. I guess I was thinking too many things to really start a conversation. Was he mad at me? Were we back at square one? Are things gonna be awkward again?

Cause right now, the tension was slowly killing me.
A silent taxi ride, a silent walk into the building, and a silent elevator ride up to our apartment.
I seriously can't deal with this anymore. But I didn't want to be the first to say something...
I was kinda scared of what he might say considering he had a complete poker face on right now.

I let out a sigh, sitting down and unlacing my shoes as Mark slid his off easily and walked right past me. By the time I finished taking off my shoes, he was already in the living room with his back facing me. His profile looked incredible in the little bit of light that was shining from the front door area and illuminating the very outskirts of the living room.

"Ummmm," I gingerly walked behind him, trying to make a semi not obvious dash to my room. Ugh...this was like a repeat of the past months, "I'm gonna take a shower first if you do-"
"Why didn't you tell me?"

He turned around and cut me off in mid-sentence, his eyes literally burning a hole in me.
I froze.
I honestly didn't know what to do. 
I didn't know how to respond.
Hell, I didn't even know what he was even talking about.

"Ok...enlighten me," I dropped my bag to the floor, pushing it behind me with my foot, "what didn't I tell you?"
"That you weren't feeling well! That you were gonna pass out!"
"News flash Mark. I didn't know I was gonna pass out! Who the hell knows that?"
"You could've at least told me that you were feeling light headed. One minute _______________. That's seriously all it takes to pull me aside and tell me that your head feels like it's spinning."
"Why do I have to tell you in the first place? What makes you the 24/7 monitor of my life?"

I didn't realize it before but the more we shouted questions and answers to each other, the closer we got.
By this point, we were less than a foot away from each other. I could see the matted pieces of his bangs sticking to his forehead from all the sweat mixing in with his hair wax. And if we got any closer, our noses would be touching.

He hesitated at my question, taking his eyes off of  me for the first time this entire verbal battle and focusing his attention to the kitchen behind me.
But I wasn't going to take the silence as an answer this time.
I needed to get out of limbo. I didn't care if it was a step backwards or forwards. I just needed out.
And for once, I listened to the little voice in the back of my head and took a leap of faith.
Literally.
My feet moved on their own, inching me closer to him. I was so close to him that I could see the little flecks of glitter still in his hair from the Haunting's confetti rain.

"Why do you care this much all of a sudden Mark? And don't avoid the question. I need legit answers this time."
"What're you talking about?" His voice wavered a bit and his eyes were still focused on the background behind me. "I've always cared about you."
"Could've fooled me."
"Ok fine. You want to know why I'm so strung up about this? Because I'm freakin mad at myself!"

Whoa.
Plot twist.
Did not expect that to come out of his mouth.

"I'm mad at myself for not noticing anything. I'm mad that I had to hear about you fainting on the balcony from Aron. I'm mad that I couldn't do anything to help you!"
"But you did he-"
"Paying for the ER costs doesn't count. I didn't do anything when Aron told us that you passed out. I literally froze. I couldn't function properly. And when the paramedics came to take you to the hospital, all I could see was you in the ambulance as a little kid that night you dad went overboard. Back then, I couldn't do anything to help you even though I wanted to. So I promised myself that the next time you needed me, I would always be there, that I would save you. But this time...I blanked. I just stood on the side lines wa-what are you doing?"

Author's Note
chapter title: Oath Sign-LiSA [x]
yay for jpop song titles! :D LiSA's one of my favorite jpop solo artists. her voice is seriously amazing and her songs are always so catchy ahhhh. this is the opening theme to fate/zero.
so my finals just ended (except for one last essay that's due today T.T) so hopefully, there'll be more updates! ^^
things are gonna start getting a bit dark and rocky so get ready hehe.