Your POV

That was the time I saw a photo on his bedside table.
From what I see,there were two laughing boys and one pouting girl in what seems like a garden...
So out of curiousity,my two feet walked on their own to the table and took it as I sat on the bed.
The girl is Dami for sure and the left boy is Jiyong because I recognize his smile..But who is the one on the right?
"my brother who is in heaven" he whispered beside me,I was too immersed in looking the photo that I didn't even realized he was beside me now.
Taking a deep breath "Guess you met all the family now" he said so quietly I barely heard it.

Oh god...

Did his brother....
Yes! He said heaven!

Oh god...

My voice got stuck in my throat... why didn't I know that?
But from my side,it's been barely a month since we both knew each other and Jiyong never ever mentioned it!
Now what the hell was I supposed to say!?!
There was really nothing to say...nothing really.
But then I looked in his eyes who were staring,boring into mine.His brown eyes are so sad and heart wrecking that were almost tearing up. Without my own will,without even thinking it,I moved closer to him and hugged him.

"I-I don't know what to say" I whispered to him,hugging him tighter,trying to make him understand I have no words to say.
He responded the hug after a few seconds later and snuggled his head into my neck.
"Then don't" he breathed. "Please" he added and it almost sounds like pleading.

And then I realized...
He was hurting...alone...for long...

We stayed like that in silence for what seems like hours I don't know...then he pulled himself away from me.
He wiped away his tears which didn't get a chance to fall down on his cheeks and looked away.
"Jiyong..." I started.
"Don't.If you are going to say sorry for my lost,please don't say it.." he trailed and his voice was sad.

Oh god...

Jiyong raised his eyes to the ceiling like he was trying to hold tears and then looked down on me again.
I just stared at him back and completely paralyzed by his gaze.

What the hell was he doing to me?

"What is his name?" I asked and our gazes were locked.
"Jinyong" he answered and I swear he flinched a little when he said...
"Is he older or younger?" I asked again.
"The eldest one in family" he answered.

I'm glad that our conversation was carried on even in this moment...even though they were short.

"Do you love him?" I asked.

Of course he love him! Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!

I didn't realized i was hitting my forehead untill he took my hand,said "Hey,stop hurting yourself" Jiyong half-smiled faintly.
"And I do love him" he confessed.
Even though I already knew,my heart sank at his words.
"I'm sure he does too" I smiled.
"I don't know.Not everyone love me including my father" he said bitterly.
"That's not true! People love you,you know..."
"Nice try Cupcake" Jiyong snorted and looked away breaking our gazes.
"I mean it! You have your mother who cares you and your sister! And also BIG BANG! There are so many people out there who care about you Jiyong."

Silence past through us since we both didn't say anything... there were only faint voices from outside and the rain drops falling against the window.

"It was my fault"

I looked at him with confused eyes,he continued "his death.It was my fault.But I keep blaming my father saying it was his to lie myself...to lie myself that it wasn't my fault."

Gulping slightly, "what happened?" I asked quietly.

"his death was suicidal" he let out a tear that escaped from his eyes...

Words are not coming out of my mouth...no even a single 'It's okay' to comfort him...

"Everyone loved my brother..."he started to whisper. "He was that kind of person who cracks a joke when I was mad at my father to earn a laugh from me,and he smiled all the time. He was that kind of person who you want to depend on all the time and who I was always envious of. He was the one who got in whenever I and my father argued,not my mother or Dami.I loved him so much.I did love him. But that was untill when I accidentally overheard about something he and my father were arguing.I was 13 at that moment by the way.So they never argued..never. I was suprised at how heated their conversation was. After some swear words from my brother,he came out of the room angrily but when he saw me,he smiled and said 'I'm gonna miss you' as if he was leaving! I was freaked out and hugged him not to go anywhere and he cried with me."

He paused and took a deep breath as if it was so hard to continue...

"But he stayed that night.He waited for me to sleep and I didn't know when he left.Next morning,my mother woke me up like she used to expect the fact that she was crying.She said 'Jinyong's dead'.I thought she was joking but her tears said it all that she was serious. I didn't cry.I didn't shed a single tear because I knew he would come back...like he always did.Later that night,I sneaked in my father's library room and found an adoption file of me. I was adopted. The person who I kept calling 'Mother' for past years wasn't my mother and so as others including my brother. I was ing adopted! Then everything makes sense,the way they treat me was different from the way they treat to my siblings.I was always left out when it comes to family thing.But I thought it was because I was young...but that wasn't because I was young,that was because I wasn't their son"

Please Don't continue anymore! I wanted to scream because it is too much for him! Losing his brother and at the same time,lost his whole family at the same time...it was too much for a kid,too much for him.

"I kept my mouth shut for a month...that I know everything..that I know I was adopted.Because I was so afraid to be kicked out.One night,I heard Dami's crying from her room.I went there to check her if she was okay.Instead she looked at me with passionate hatred and told me he was dead because of me.It wasn't making any sense for me.But then she explained everything...why she hated me.Why she thought,I killed him. Then I realized I killed him..."

"My dad wanted only one son from the first but at the request of my brother,they adopted me and we were happy for a moment.But what happened that night was,my dad planned to send me back to orphanage and Jinyong found out.So they started to argue about me. He didn't want me anymore because I was becoming an adult and afraid to lose his properties to me. He wanted me to get out of his life because I was preventing his son's future. Dami told me that my father let him to chose whether to send me back or to leave...and he chose the latter.But he chose to leave forever....he was drunk while driving and I knew he planned it.If he didn't choose me,he wouldn't die...and I were be fine at the orphan.If I were not adopted,he wouldn't have to choose me.If I weren't born in the world,he would have been alive now. It was all my fault."

"Don't say that....don't ever say that.You were born for a reason.And your brother,he did that because you deserved to be happy in your life with a family,not in an orphanage."  I whispered but he laughed bitterly.

"Happy? Do you think I'm happy now? Because I'm not! Because I felt nothing but pains since the day he left me,since the day I found out I was an orphan! Do you think I can live happily when everyone around me think I was the cause of death? I was the monster in that family,cupcake.I was the monster. Do you still think I'm happy?" I know he was trying his best not to yell at me...

"No,that's not true,Jiyong.You are not monster and you deserved to be happy. He did that because he loved you.He cared about you! And I'm sure he wouldn't want you to think things like that."

Jiyong didn't seem to believe me but he chose not to comment on that.He closed his eyes and then opened again to look at straight into my eyes... I wanted to his face gently...but I didn't...

"Comforting me wasn't your job...and it doesn't suit you actually" Jiyong said breaking the silence.
"But that's what friend does" I looked at him.
"Friend? You are not my friend" he said and staring back at me,with a playful smile on his lips.

Yesssss!
After a long time what seems like centuries,he SMILED! I know he is still sad but not as sad as before!
"I would prefer the word 'girlfriend' " Jiyong said and smirked slightly.
"Girlfriend" I snorted.
"Yep.It sounds just perfect" he smirked!

Jiyong's smirk!

I shook my head a bit and laughed "It doesn't,for me"
"Come on,I know you love it" he teased.
I sighed,not because of he was teasing me,it was because I felt relief he wasn't so sad anymore.

"what's with the sigh?" he asked,giving me a little shove of the shoulder.
I shook my head a bit and grinned at him which I earned a weird look from him.

"Love birds! Private time is over! Time for school!" the annoying old man also known as TOP yelled and kept knocking on the door.
Jiyong rolled his eyes before muttering 'silly old man' under his breath.
I laughed a little when he said 'old man'...
Hey at least there was something Jiyong and I look a like.

"Let's go before he breaks the door" he intertwined our fingers and lead me to the door.
So it became natural for us to hold each other hands...
Well that's not that bad...I guess.

"Finally!" Seungri yelled as soon as we opened the door and stepped outside.
We both glared before saying 'Shut up' and walked past him,leave him with his mouth opened in shock along with TOP.
"Yongbae,we are leaving" Jiyong informed his friend who is reading something on the couch beside Daesung who is playing snakes and ladder alone!
Someone tell me,he is fine,mentally. I mean who in their right mind plays that game a lone when that someone is a gangster for Pete Sake!
"Okay,we will stay then.See ya,Gabby" Yongbae said and gave me one of his eye smile that I almost melted!
Damn...
"annyeong" I waved at him and smiled back.

~*~

I was soaked wet when I get out of his car because of the stupid rain and my brain that doesn't know when to take umbrella.
Well,not that wet...still wet!
I run without glancing back at Jiyong who is shouting my name towards the school...
Seriously? It's raining hard and what makes him think that I would wait for him and walked to school!
"I'm wet! It's all because of you!" I whined once he sat beside me in the cafe.
Thankgod it's still lunch time...
"Are you? " he asked me with a devil smirk.
I should've known that!

That ert!

"Oh my god,Kwon Jiyong! Stop changing all the things I said into ual for once!" I squeaked.
He laughed. "I would but I love seeing your reaction.It surely amazes me"
I ignored him and said "Should we order some food? I m hungry"
Fortunately, he nodded and went to the counter.

He returned with a tray of food later and set to the table.
The first thing I see was freaking Peanut Butter Cookies and Strawberry Pie!
God! I could always skip the rest of the class just to eat them!
Jiyong - 1 point!

"Hey,are you gonna eat them?" Jiyong asked with amusement.
Then,I looked at his food to see what he likes.
It was just a tuna sandwich with a glass of milk.
"Eww,you like tuna?" I twitched my lips and pointed at his sandwich.
"Hey! You are talking like it was some disgusting thing! My tuna is awesome" he defended and hid his poor thing with his arm.
Well,who knows Mr.Bad boy is possessive over the freaking Tuna.
"My bad" I mumbled and moaned as I took a bite of Peanut Butter Cookies.

It was HEAVEN.!
"You know it was quite good to hear you moan while eating beside-"
"KWON JIYONG!"
I pretended to gag about one minutes here and there.
He was LAUGHING!
As if it wasn't him about an hour ago in his room who looks so depressed and hopless.
That Two-faced Prick!

I abandoned him with my two poor food which I just lost my interest because of that 'moan' thing,I stormed off to the locker to grab my things.
As I opened my lockers,I found a piece of paper above my books.
It says 'Turn around'
So I did what it said,but there was no one behind me.
Pouting a little, I mumbled 'idiot' to the writer whoever it is.
"May be the poor paper is saying to turn it around not you" A voice behind me whispered.
I let out a shriek and jumped about 3 feet in suprise before turning around.
"Hi" I awkwardly smiled at my two years crush who is watching me with amused eyes.
"Hello,Jumpy" he poked my nose.
Gosh...
What was these two guys doing to me?
"So it was yours?" I asked him and raised the paper to show him.
"what?"
"this"
"No?" he said with a confused eyes.
"And you are not going to turn it around?" he asked as he leaned against the locker.

He was in his usual shorts with sleeveless jacket.His hair is in a messy way and there was a slight of sweat on his face.
Well,he's just back from training I guess.But he was HOT.
"Hello there,are you still in  there,Gabby?" he asked and knocked my head twice.
"Ouch!"
He chuckled "Oh,she's back"
I rolled my eyes and turn the paper around.It says 'Have a nice day,beautiful' with a cute writing.
I blushed....
"Awe,looks like you've got a secret admirer" he sang song.

I replied nothing because I was still blushing like an idiot!
Snap out of it Gaberielle! It was just some stupid prank!
But then again, I can't help but smile at this unknown guy's words...

As I was about to enter the classroom,I received a message from Jiyong...

Annoying Prick : Thanks for today,my cupcake <3

I smiled and even giggled when I saw 'my' in front of 'cupcake' ...

Possessive much huh?...

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Holla! my potatoes! I'm back with looooooooooong update! Sorry for the wait :( I was busy... And thanks amillion for your votes,comments,and subscriptions! It means a LOT to me! :) And keep doing that also so who knows I can update sooner when I got more votes lol XD

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