Lonely. That's the emotion Kyungsoo feels punch him right in the flesh covering his heart when he throws the door to his and Jongin's apartment open and all the lights are still switched off. Unfolded laundry is the only thing that greets him when he makes his way inside, toeing off his sneakers and kicking them out of the way.

He heaves a sigh. He hates days like this.

'This' means he's had to spend hours and hours after all his colleagues had gone home trying to appease a client, one of those who had no idea what kind of graphics they're going for for their online ad campaign, only repeating the words Kyungsoo's grown to hate the most in his years as a web and graphic designer - 'I just want it to look good.'

Four hours and a cup of stolen ramen from the office pantry later, Kyungsoo is extremely tired. He at least has a vague idea of what his clients want - clean, natural, organic but not too "foresty", whatever that means - but he has to put together a cohesive portfolio for them by noon the next day, and he just - he can't.

He doesn't even have the energy to properly reply Sooyoung's text, let alone slave away at his laptop into the wee hours of the morning. He is tired and weary to his very bones, and Sooyoung's text is one that tells him they've reached the second trimester mark of her pregnancy - it adds to his fear, multiplies his insecurities about how incompetent of a father he's going to be when the time comes.

He feels his frustration condense into tears slipping down his cheeks, and then his nose is blocked and he can't breathe and he just - he feels soalone. He's never been one to continuously pine for his husband, but right now - right now he'd give anything to have Jongin smile against the skin of his wrist before gently kissing him there and pulling him against his chest.

Notes shrill in the stale air of the apartment, accompanying the lit up screen of Kyungsoo's phone. He sniffles a little and swallows down the lump in his throat before he reaches for the device - his heart does a somersault, it's Jongin.

'Hey baby,' Jongin's voice crackles over bad reception and more distance between them than there ever has been, and Kyungsoo can feel his worries fade, just the slightest bit. He sniffles. 'Baby - is everything alright? Sooyoung and - and the baby?' Jongin asks, voice riddled with worry.

Kyungsoo can't help but smile to himself, feels affection flood his heart when he hears how genuinely concerned his husband is for their future child and the woman carrying him or her. 'Sooyoung - Sooyoung and the baby are fine. She just texted me, actually. Says we're going into second trimester,' Kyungsoo manages. He doesn't know if he's being overly attentive or if he's thinking too much, but he's almost certain he can hear Jongin's smile filling the silence that follows his words.

'And how about you? How was your day? You were supposed to meet your new clients today, right?' Jongin asks. Kyungsoo can imagine it, can see it as clearly in his mind as his eyes can register high definition images - Jongin in a hotel robe lying on ludicrously posh bedspreads, phone pressed to his ear, a smile refusing to leave his lips. And longing hits him like waves during high tide - he misses Jongin, misses him so, so much. Fresh tears paint tracks on his cheeks, and he can't hide the resulting sniffle. 'Baby? Is everything alright?'

'No,' Kyungsoo whines, not even ashamed that he's a father-to-be who sounds exactly like a child. No matter how big he gets or how old he becomes, he is still unmistakably small - a child facing fears as menacing as the concrete of unforgiving skyscrapers. 'I've had a terrible day, my clients didn't know about what they wanted so I only got home like ten minutes ago, I haven't been able to properly get any chores done today and I have to work on a portfolio to show them by tomorrow and Sooyoung's pregnancy is going by really fast and - Jongin, I can't take this.'

'Shh, baby. Stop crying,' Jongin says, trying his best to sound as soft as possible from miles away. 'It's going to be okay, alright? You're going to be fine. You're going to stop crying, go wash your face, and then you're gonna take that portfolio one step at a time. Don't worry about the chores, I'll help you once I get back. Sooyoung's not going to give birth any time soon, honey - you'll be more ready than you are now when the time comes.'

Kyungsoo wipes at his tears with his sleeve, feeling certainty spark somewhere in the back of his mind. Jongin is right, has always been when it comes to these things - he's always landed on his feet and brushed himself off, he can do it again if he set his mind to it. 'Thanks, Jongin,' he mumbles, properly smiling when Jongin chuckles with a you're welcome.

'I miss you, you know, Soo,'
'I miss you too.'
'How much?'
'... I'm not answering that. Why are you being cheesy all of a sudden?'
'Because my mistress is here and I'm trying to make you hang up.'
'Kindly throw yourself out the window,'

Jongin chuckles again. 'I love you too, Soo.'