“Seung-hmph!” He forces his lips on mine and his tongue darts out once more. What’s gotten into him suddenly? He broke off our kiss and made his way to my jaw line then starts to nibble on my ear. My stomach tightened, but this is not the right time to be doing this.

                “We need to talk Seunghyun!” I said while gasping for air at the same time. He slips his hand into my shirt and my torso burn with heat when he touches it.

                “Why not later?” He rasped while planting kisses all over my neck. I felt my breathe quickened. I’m about to lose my mind.

                “It’s important. Kyah!” Seunghyun suddenly sat up, grabbed my waist and pulled me onto his lap. His gaze was a killer. I feel like if I don’t stop now, every part of my body would be completely engulfed by him. Our lips united once more. I bit his lower lip, hoping he would stop for a second so I could tell him what’s going on. Instead, he snickered and left another trail along my neck. Shivers engulfed me and my back arched in pleasure. I have to stop this, I thought to myself.

                “I’m – leaving, Seung - hyun.” I could hardly get the words out from my lips with so little control over my body. Seunghyun became as stiff as a rock. His head slowly rise up from my chest and stared at me painfully. My heart stopped for a second, but I knew that this was coming. No use hiding it from him anymore.

                “What you mean?” I avoided his gaze and a lump starts to form in my throat.

                “I’m leaving to the States. I just got a scholarship from a university.” I explained slowly, looking down on his collarbones.

                “Why you tell me now?” His voice was filled with confusion.

                “I didn’t want to hurt you.”

                “But you already did. I’ll go with you.” He suggested.

                “No, Seunghyun. You already started life in Instantlogy on a better foot, if you come with me you’ll have to do it all over again. I can’t let that happen. As much as I would love to stay here with you, I want to reach my dream.” I held his face in my palms softly, shivering. How can I add on another scar to this man again? Guilt slapped me hard.

                “So you just… Give me false hope then leave me like everybody else?” He swept both my hands off gently.

                “I’m sorry. I can’t stay. I need to know what is this feeling towards you Seunghyun. I can’t figure myself out, this is the only way for me and it’s my dream. I want to go.”

                “Just go then.” He stood up and avoided my gaze.

                “I’ll come back. But you don’t have to wait for me.” I followed.

                “It doesn’t really matter now does it?” He faked a smile.

                Seunghyun walked over to his coat and pulled out a box then opened it in front of me. When he turned the box around, I really couldn’t forgive myself.

                “It’s a couple necklace I got for us. I just want to give you yours so it doesn’t go to waste.” He pulled my hand out and placed the necklace on it. My chest tightened again, how can I be so cruel?

                “When you leaving?” He asked me as if nothing was wrong.

                “Tomorrow.” I forced the word out from my throat. He went silent for awhile and walked away. My body refuses to move and my heart shredded to pieces, but I bet this is not even half of what Seunghyun has gone through just now. My eyes start to burn and tears start falling like there’s no end. All I could do was just standing here, holding on to the necklace so tight that my hand turned numb. I couldn’t bear to make even a slight weeping sound, I didn’t want to make him feel anymore worse.

                “I’m taking my leave then.” His footsteps trailed off and the door closed softly behind him.

                Silence surrounds me. Why do I feel more miserable then I thought I actually would? His painful smile is haunting me and just the thought of him made me snicker. It’s like I’ve fallen into an abyss.

Park Bom, you brought this on yourself, you’re so pathetic.

-Seunghyun’s-

                I closed her door behind me and my knees weakened. I feel like my soul is tearing apart, all senses completely numbed by the reality. I slowly slide down onto the floor. Hands covered my face, with silence surrounding me as many thoughts rushed through.

                So she didn’t even loved me from the beginning then? Haha… I laughed at myself in silent. You gave your all, and in the end she leaves you. What a sore loser, Seunghyun.

                I know everyone leaves, but I really didn’t see this one coming. When I thought she’s the only one who would stay by my side, she just had to go and leave me like everyone else again. Maybe I should just isolate myself from the world, so nobody leaves me ever again.

                I picked myself up. Like one with no soul, I slowly made my way down to the carpark. Park Bom’s words still ringing in my head. It’s her dream, I keep telling myself.

                They say if you really love that person, you would let them go right? But why is it so hard to just let her go like that? I really can’t. Even if someone ripped my skull into half, the pain is incomparable to how hard reality just hit me.

                The more I think about it, the more frustrated I got with myself.

                I grabbed as much alcohol as I possibly could from the bar counter and went into my room. I switched on the TV, just to make it seem less lonely, crashed on the sofa and drank my heart out. The bitterness from the alcohol reminded me of how much I actually loved her.

                Bottle after bottle, I tried salvaging myself from misery. But still, a warm sensation trickled down my cheek. I failed.
I look at the lock in my hand, I didn't even get the chance to unlock it. Maybe we're never meant to be. Still, I coudln't help but have a little hope. A small hope, that maybe I would be able to get through this.

                Unfortunately, the heart never lies. 

*I'm back! Sorry if i really couldn't portray out their emotions, my command of english isn't very good. Haha. Mianhe!~ Hope you'll enjoy the update. I'm sorry for making them leave each other. But yea..... they're probably like, Baby I'm so lonely loney lonely lonely lonely~ And I actually think it's really short... So I'll try to update soon alright! Please shower me with comments!*