It was a super hectic and tiring day today.
I couldn’t sleep for the whole night and ended up having really dark circles this morning. I got ready, had some cereal and waited for Seunghyun to pick me up as I do not know where the location of the shoot was.

                I think I fell asleep in the car and when Seunghyun woke me up, we were at this really huge building and by looking at the name of the building, it must be the Instantlogy headquarters! This is where Nikki unnie works, and just by knowing that I was going to do a photo shoot there for the day, my skin tingles with excitement but at the same time, I was very nervous.

                Before I knew it, all sorts of people started styling my hair and applying my make-up. Seunghyun was at the other end of the room so I didn’t know what he looked at until mine was done.

                My dark circles were covered with layers and layers of concealer. My eyelids were covered in dark blue, which seems like the colour of the night; dark and mysterious. The left side of my hair was brought to the right and was styled in loose curls.

                The first dress I put on was the cream-coloured silk one. It must have been designed by Nikki unnie as the pattern on the dress was very detailed and it also gives off an elegant feel. I looked over to Seunghyun, his suit was in cream as well. With a black detail on his sleeves and collars, he looked very handsome… Just for today….

                The photographer came over and told us what were we supposed to do and what are the concepts for today’s shoot. The first few frames I was totally tensed up and I didn’t went close enough to Seunghyun. The photographer reminded me many times but I couldn’t loosen myself up, so Seunghyun had his solo shoot first. I observed how he stares into the camera and his postures, he really seemed like a professional.

                The photographer called me again to start my solo shoot. I tried imitating Seunghyun’s looks and changed my posture from time to time as I really didn’t want to disappoint him again. The photographer praised me this time and I felt like I just received a boost of confidence. V^^

                The stylists changed my make-up and dress many times. For the couple shoot, my eyes were absolutely covered in the colour of charcoal and once again, very dark which I absolutely loved it. This time, I was wearing my own dress, I feel at ease because this is my work and I’m actually presenting it myself, it made me feel proud.

                I had to lie on the sofa that they prepared, looking up to Seunghyun who was  removing my shoes. After a few frames, the photographer asked us to sit on the sofa and I had to lean against him restlessly while played with my hair. When I felt his touch, my mind started to go haywire again. Just touching my hair already made me go absolutely weird, then what about the rest of the shoot? I was hoping that I wouldn’t go crazy by the end of the day.

                We tried many poses but the photographer said he still couldn’t get that ‘particular’ shot yet. Seunghyun pulled me up and suddenly grabbed my waist. I made a face as my forehead bumped into his chest.

                “Ow…” I rubbed my forehead.

                “Oh, I’m sorry. You alright?” Seunghyun bent down to take a look at my forehead. His face is like an inch away, hell no.

                “Stay there! Seunghyun look at her lovingly and Park Bom tilt your face a little, like your it is being pulled into him.” The photographer suddenly gave us instructions. Seunghyun follow through straight but I was still as stiff as a tree.

                “Relax, you look gorgeous. Have some confidence.” Seunghyun whispered in my ear. Even though my heart was thumping so hard, I knew that I have to get over the fear and get this done. I followed the photographer’s instructions closely and I felt like Seunghyun was really helping me a lot. He was giving me a lot of hints of what to do and how to carry out the emotions properly. Maybe I could really trust him, I just don’t know…

                “You did a good job.” Seunghyun said to me while he was driving to my place.

                “Are you lying?” I looked at him suspiciously.

                “Haha! Bom ah! You seriously have to trust me sometimes. Why on earth would I lie to my girlfriend?” His words hit me. I can’t figure myself out… I became quiet and pretended to fall asleep.

                “Aigoo, why did you fell asleep on me again?” I heard him complained but I still kept my eyes shut until he reached my apartment. I didn’t say much and before I could step out of his car, he grabbed my arm.

                “You alright? Usually you’ll give me that hamster face.”

                “I’m just tired after a long day.” I gave him an excuse, he kissed my forehead like he usually does and said good night.

               On the way up to my room, many thoughts ran through my mind. To trust or not to trust. I couldn’t take it anymore, so I cleared my mind while taking my warm bathe. I my computer and I was ecstatic to see an e-mail from the School Of The Arts in the States in my inbox. I clicked it straight away.

                I applied for a scholarship awhile back before I became an intern for Instantlogy. It has always been my dream to attend that university and it would be convenient as my mum is living in the States as well. The page loaded and the first sentence already made me feel like I’m on top of the world.

                ‘Congratulations, you’ve have received a scholarship from School Of The Arts.’ Oh my gawd, I am so going to USA. This year has to be one of the best year ever! I start to imagine my life in the States but suddenly a person came to my mind.

                What about Seunghyun? This question went back and forth through my mind. What is he going to do if another person leaved him again? I would become a bad person… But this is my dream… Which one I’m I supposed to choose this time?

                Leaving or staying would be the same. If I stay, I would have to abandon my dream, but if I leave, he’ll get hurt…

                This is killing me.

*Yessssaaahhh! Another update, sorry for the wait. T.T Thanks everybodeh who wished me good luck for my exams! It's gonna be over soon, like next week Wednesday and after that, I can troll as much as I want. HAHAHA! K, I'll end here. <3 yous. And I kinda think this chapter is slightly boring... Ha-ha-ha, putting myself down. Tell me what cha think!*