“Appa!” Yesung yelled as soon as Hangeng stepped through the door Eeteuk had just opened for him. Eeteuk stepped aside with a smile and went back to the kitchen to check on the cupcakes he had just taken out of the oven. The boy stormed towards his appa, happily jumping up to hug him, Hangeng catching him in the air with the practised air of a parent who had tried this many times before.

“Hi you. I missed you,” Hangeng breathed in to Yesung’s hair as he held him close for a moment, only to be pulled out of it by a tugging at his leg.

“Appa miss Minnie too?” Sungmin asked with big innocent eyes, looking up at his appa and his brother from where he stood on the floor.

“Yes, of course, baobei,” Hangeng chuckled and carefully let Yesung down, ending in a crouch so he could include his youngest son in the hug.

“Appa, I learned how to swim!” Yesung enthusiastically told into Hangeng’s shoulder.

“I pwayed a wrubber duckie!” Sungmin quipped, also wanting attention from his appa, now that the man was finally here.

“You’ll have to show me sometime, but right now I need to talk to umma, okay?” Hangeng promised his sons while casting a glance at his husband who had witnessed the entire scene from where he sat at the dinner table. Heechul rose slowly and began making his way over to the three people that meant more to him than life itself. Hangeng stood up, not knowing exactly how to greet him, leaving Yesung and Sungmin to stand and look at their parents in confusion.

“Yesung, Minnie, do you want to help me put frosting on these cupcakes?” Eeteuk called conveniently from the open kitchen.

“Pink fwosting?” Sungmin asked with all the glimmers of a Christmas tree in his eyes.

“Yes we can do pink frosting,” Eeteuk replied with a smile, causing Sungmin to squeal and wobble towards Eeteuk immediately. Yesung stood beside Hangeng, clearly not certain that his parents should be alone right now.

“We can also make one that looks like a turtle, Yeye,” Eeteuk suggested with a smile after having hoisted Sungmin up on his hip. Yesung made a sound between a squeal and a yell and bolted towards Eeteuk, the promise of a turtle cupcake making him decide that his parents would be fine on their own. Heechul gratefully mouthed a “thank you” to Eeteuk, who smiled and nodded in answer, before he caught Hangeng’s eyes and signalled for him to follow. They ended up in the twins and Siwon’s room. Heechul turned to Hangeng when the latter closed the door behind them, arms crossed over his chest in a somewhat protective stance. Hangeng tried to catch his husband’s eyes, but Heechul stubbornly kept his gaze on the floor.

“Jagiya, please look at me,” Hangeng begged softly, stepping closer to Heechul. The latter sighed deeply after a few seconds of silence and looked back at Hangeng, tears threatening to fall.

“I’m sorry,” Hangeng breathed, the sight of Heechul crying making his heart drop and his stomach ache.

“I miss you and the boys so much all the time. It feels like I’ve only seen them when they are sleeping recently. I thought we were fine, I thought I could do this and that everything would be fine once things got straightened out with the company. But if you actually thought that I was cheating on you, that I could ever cheat on you, I was wrong. I thought my work was worth it, but nothing will ever be worth losing you and the boys. If they won’t let me cut down my hours, I’ll quit. You and the boys are my dream, has been ever since I met you and that is what I will fight for,” he declared with all the raw honesty and emotion of a man who had just bared his heart for the one he loved. Heechul took a second to digest the words of his husband, before he stepped forward and pulled Hangeng into a tight hug.

“We missed you too,” Heechul mumbled into Hangeng’s shoulder where he was resting his head. “The boys kept asking for you. They kept making drawings and stuff they wanted to show you. And I just... I’ve not been myself lately.”

“Why not?” Hangeng asked, tightening his hold on his lover and gently resting his lips on Heechul’s forehead. He frowned when Heechul let out a deep sigh.

“I just feel so... captured. Don’t get me wrong,” he added quickly when Hangeng withdrew slightly to look at him. “I love you and I love the kids, but I just... I’m not... This person is not the one you fell in love with, Geng. When you met me, I would have kicked you in the balls if you told me that I would be a stay at home umma and my life would evolve around diapers and play dates. And I just started thinking ‘He fell in love with another person, once he realises that it is only a matter of time before he leaves me to find someone else’. I know you wouldn’t do that, but the thoughts wouldn’t leave. I love Sungmin and Yesung more than anything and I could never regret being a parent. But I feel like I don’t know who I am anymore, I don’t know what happened to the person I was when you met me, and it scares me, because he was the one you fell in love with.”

“I fell in love with Kim Heechul,” Hangeng began slowly, making sure that he had Heechul’s full attention. “You are still Kim Heechul. Yes, you’ve changed, but so have I. We changed together. And I on