It only took three sharp knocks for Moonbyul to open her apartment door, three knocks from Solar. Moonbyul was ready to put herself to sleep but she couldn’t, her mind is still on the re-run from tonight’s happenings. And that talks about Solar, not attending their family dinner, a chance that her mother gave them. The girl from the outside tried her best to smile but Moonbyul wouldn’t see it for her eyes are casted down, unable to even meet the girl’s eyes.

“I went to the restaurant but I didn’t…see you there,” Solar started, feeling the need to gulp down every ounce of shame and guilt into her system. “And this waiter came up to me, asking if I was with you, because you left your phone,” Solar held up Moonbyul’s phone, reaching it out to her. Solar knew, she knew the girl left it purposely.

Moonbyul nodded as she quietly said a ‘thanks’ to her, grabbing the phone on Solar’s hand.

“Can I come in?” Solar could even hear herself almost pleading when she said that to her girlfriend. And she thinks if she hadn’t asked that question, Moonbyul will not let her stay for more than a minute. But being a kind soul, Moonbyul nods her head, opening the door more for her.

As Solar walks inside, Moonbyul gently closed the door behind her. She turned around just to see the almost brown-haired girl still looking on the ground and not sparing a glance in her direction. And it pains her. She could already feel the tightening in her chest and it hurts so badly.

 The taller girl stayed silent, placing her phone on the top of her drawer. Solar just observed the other girl’s actions.

“Byul,” Solar finally called out, forwarding to reach the girl. She was about to cup Moonbyul’s cheeks but the latter looks the other way, unable for Solar to hold it. And in that instant, Solar could feel her chest tightening more and some atomic bomb will explode inside her chest at any given moment. Moonbyul took a step back, and Solar drops her arms to her side. Their proximity is still in each other’s intimate territory, but both of them feels too distant and it scares Solar the most.

“I’m sorry, Byul.” Solar’s voice sounded cracked and there goes the tears welling in her eyes, ready to fall but blinking it away. “I’m sorry…I’ve let you down,” She blinks rapidly, still looking at Moonbyul’s emotionless face, “Again.”

Moonbyul glances down on her wrist watch, it’s already late, “You should go. Is Hwasa with you? I’ll call her if she’s not. She will drive you home.” Her voice was deep, emotionless as her face. Moonbyul grabs her phone to dial Hwasa but she stops when Solar hugs her from behind.

Solar’s tears immediately wet some parts of her shirt, she felt the girl’s grips on her shirt tighten. She let out a quiet gasp, closing her eyes tightly too. As much as she feels disappointed tonight, she still can’t stand a crying Solar, it breaks her heart.

“Please, Byul…” Solar sobs, pulling Moonbyul closer to her, “I’m sorry…I’m sorry,” Solar buried her face in Moonbyul’s back, muffling her sobs and all her sorry. “I’ll be better, I know I’ve said this before and I don’t have excuse but I know I ed up. And I’m sorry. I love you, please. Talk to me. Yell at me if you like. Make me feel bad about this. I can take anything but please…let’s not break up.” Her final phrase came out like a whisper because she couldn’t even bear saying that or even hearing that. But she needed to say that because this feels like a scene where a separation act is just around the corner and it will hit them. And while she’s looking at Moonbyul earlier, she feels it might happen.

Moonbyul’s hands turned into fists, gripping the phone in her hand tightly.

“I thought tonight was going to be great. My mother and you will just get along just fine, I know she still can’t fully accept us but this night should be the stepping stone, right?” Moonbyul should paused right here, because she too could feel the sadness that her tears decided to appear in her eyes. But she didn’t let it fall.

“I’m trying to make the ends meet, Yongsun. But what had happen earlier, it feels like we’re back to one again…and it’s getting… so tiring.” Moonbyul puts a hand over to her eyes, using her palm to wipe those welling tears.

And the last words were the triggering factor that made the figurative atomic bomb inside Solar’s chest to explode.  She couldn’t move, her eyes are wide but tears are still flowing non-stop and her grip in Moonbyul’s front shirt is still tight that her knuckles could turn white.

“Tell me you didn’t mean that, Moonbyul.” Solar mumbled, every word she said she could feel gasping for air. “Please…”

“No matter how you twist the world, she’s still my mom, Yongsun. I want her to like you, I want her to see what I love about you. And Christ, I want her to see you, to see what I’ve been fighting for and for her to at least once in my life, be proud of my choices. But I guess, everything isn’t what we’ve wanted.”

Moonbyul looks down on Solar’s hands that hold her shirt, she cracked a smile, but a sad one. She slowly lifted her arms from her sides and gently puts her hands on top of Solar’s, and it made the latter sobs uncontrollably. Moonbyul slowly takes Solar’s arms off around her, leaving Solar a crying mess. And what makes Solar sadder, Moonbyul didn’t turn around to hug her just like what she do every time she cries. Instead, Moonbyul said that she have to call Hwasa for her to pick Solar up.

“She’s on her way here.” Moonbyul said, glancing to Solar who’s now wiping the tears on her face but her tears keeps on staining her beautiful face. Moonbyul had the urge to just scoop Solar in her arms, she still cares for the girl, she still loves Solar but sometimes there are lessons in love that you’ll need to learn the hard way.

 And what’s worst is, Moonbyul didn’t even know if this is the right way to learn it.

God, please help them.

--

It’s been three days since that night happened, no Moonbyul for three days and it really feels like the days she left Bucheon comes flooding on her. She has lost interests to just go out and it made Hwasa worried, especially her dad.

Solar spent her days in her room, crying her eyes out and sometimes calling Moonbyul but no one’s answering the phone then she will cry again. Somehow, Hwasa is in her room today, paying a visit and to check if she hadn’t committed suicide yet.

“I’m not going to kill myself, Hwasa.” Solar said in her most dead voice, the voice that could brighten up the day isn’t there anymore. Solar does not smile anymore, not laugh anymore and Hwasa could tell, just by looking at Solar’s eyes that the girl hasn’t been sleeping well. And Moonbyul wasn’t better at all too, Hwasa met Moonbyul earlier this day for the latter needs to know how her Solar was doing.

Hwasa just heaved a sigh when she saw Moonbyul. Messy hair, bags under her eyes, and always staring at nothing.

“Damn you guys, sometimes I think the two of you are crazy. Mental couple.”  Hwasa said, shaking her head, biting the doughnut in her hand. But Solar didn’t answer, she laid herself again on her mattress, curling like a ball. Hwasa noticed again the sadness in her friend’s eyes.

“Do you think lying in that bed of yours will solve your problems?”

Solar heard Hwasa say, “What do you want me to do? Moonbyul clearly wants this off for awhile.”

“She said that?”

“Not really, but that’s what she wanted to say the other night.” Solar remembered it again. Moonbyul didn’t raise her voice on her and she certainly didn’t hurt Solar physically. But it hurts like hell. And Solar realizes that it doesn’t take any yelling or physical pain for you to feel hurt, it’s the blow of the words and the person telling those words. She buried her face on the pillow next to her and as tears flows again.

Hwasa purses her lips at the sight, “Oh, Yongsun.” She strides until she reaches Solar’s bed, she then propped herself next to her friend and Hwasa just hugged her. Tightly. But it made Solar cry even more.

“Moonbyul will still hold you, Yongsun. She will and I know it.” Hwasa reassure Solar by those words, rubbing her friend’s arm. And Hwasa knows that Solar believed it.

--

“It’s been weeks. And I miss sister-in-law.” Yuju said, unusually her voice is kind of sad, which is rare if Moonbyul must say. But Moonbyul kept mum and started writing down notes for her incoming exams. Yuju stared at her sister as she keeps biting the straw inside , and she sips her passion fruit flavored juice.  It’s amazing how Moonbyul is juggling her schedule from constantly checking on Solar and school, and damn, her sister knows her priorities. Yuju knew what had happened between her sister and Solar, it made her sad because she really like Yongsun-unnie to be with Moonbyul-unnie.

“Did you break up with sister-in-law?” Yuju asked.

But she didn’t get a reply.

“But if you two did, why do you keep on checking on her if she’s fine or not. You know where she will go and even her next schedule? Do you still care for her?” The innocent Yuju asked again, “Because my friend said that, if a couple already broke up, they will not know things about each other anymore or even care.”

But again, no reply.

“Let’s just call that a complicated love, Yuju.”

Another voice butts in with a sigh, Whee In sits down beside the girl with a smile on her.  Yuju looks at her with a confused expression and it made Whee In chuckles, “You will know that when you get a little older.”

“Whee In-unnie, there’s no such thing as complicated love. You see, if people could just be honest and straight up answer questions there’s no need for this complicated love.” Yuju said confidently, quoting the word ‘complicated love’.

Whee In’s face gives an impressive expression to Yuju for her impressive remarks, and she saw from her peripheral that it caught Moonbyul’s attention too as the girl glances at them momentarily but she went back to her notes.

“But somehow, the in-betweens in love could change it.” Moonbyul suddenly blurted out. “And by that, honesty is taken away. All things are not just a matter of yes or no and you will think of an answer until it reaches to what you call ‘complicated’, Yuju. People are complicated, just like that.” She continued but she doesn’t look up, she’s still jotting down something in her notes. And Moonbyul’s so calm while saying it.

And that shut Whee In and Yuju up, they could just stare at the girl in front of them. Moonbyul could feel their stares that she decided to spare them a look. The duo just stares at her, like she just won a Nobel Prize by saying that. Moonbyul frowned for a bit but an amused smile suddenly appeared in her face.

She pats Yuju’s head, but Yuju gave no emotion. “But nice point you got there, my younger sister.” Moonbyul said. After that she takes off her hand from Yuju’s head and started going through her book again finding the mechanism of action of the drugs called Zoloft and Prozac, which she thought that she could probably take to stop this depressing view. “And can I just say that your friend for saying such things?”                                                                   

Whee In chuckles while Yuju snorts. But nonetheless, Moonbyul knew that Solar and her are hitting some kind of a big challenge in their relationship, both of them are heartbroken about this. Heartbreak for some people is a cliché but for them it’s like a bomb that hits Nagasaki.

After that torturous review of Moonbyul, Yuju’s constant nagging and blabbering and Whee In’s bullying to Yuju they left the diner, peacefully. The youngest among them burps so loud that people around them looks at her with a surprise.

“What a lady, Yuju.” Whee In rolls her eyes, punching Yuju’s shoulder. Moonbyul could only laugh, a laugh that she could make this whole day. She knows that Yuju is busy too with her upcoming final exams and that she’s busy finalizing her thoughts for her college application and Whee In has been busy contacting their clients for her friend’s exhibit, probably she has a meeting today. But they are on Moonbyul’s side today, they may not say it out loud but she knows that they’re doing their best to uplift her spirit. And she’s thankful for that.

But then, three teenage girls probably Yuju’s age, blocks their way after they turn right into the corner. Both Whee In and Moonbyul frown while Yuju just looks at them, uninterested.

“Hello, Yuju.” The shoulder length haired girl said, smirking.

Moonbyul nudges her sister, “Yah. What did you do this time?” She hissed, looking at her sister with a clearly frustrated look.

“They’re from school. Some es who talked Yongsun-unnie and of course, it made my blood boil and I made their other friend Tzuyu, to go back to Taiwan because of food poisoning. To seek treatment there, but what the hell it’s just food poisoning, you can’t die because of that.” Yuju casually said, looking at the girls in front of her, smiling sarcastically.

Whee In clearly laughed at that while Moonbyul, being in the medical field almost slapped her sister for her ignorance.

“And by the way, they’re Japanese.” Yuju clarified, pointing at them. “That’s Momo Hirai on the right, Sana Minatozaki on the left and Mina Myoui on the center.”

“Oh my gosh, Yuju. Don’t pick up a fight, didn’t I tell you that already?” Moonbyul’s eyes are wide as saucers now, saying it on gritted teeth. “And they’re Japanese, they know karate!”

“Um guys, I think they’re ready to fight.” Whee In said worriedly, stepping back tapping Moonbyul’s arm. Moonbyul turned to the girl’s direction and they’re slowly walking up to them.

“Hold up kids.” Moonbyul holds up her arms in mid-air, trying to show the girls that they’re not here to fight, she racks up her brain for any Japanese words that might calm these kids down. God, kids these days has too many ‘fight me’ urges.  “Konnichiwa-yo, kids.” Welp, that doesn’t sound Japanese.

Whee In slaps her forehead, real hard. Yuju stares at her sister with disgust. And it seems like the Japanese aren’t holding back, they’re really going to beat them up. Moonbyul kicks the ground and looks at Yuju, who is now cracking her knuckles and stretching her neck. So, it all comes down to this.

“Whee In you take care of that blonde one, the sleepy looking girl who looks like she took tranquilizer before coming here.” Moonbyul ordered, making her friend drops her jaw. “Yuju with that doll-faced individual, Sana Minat…okay her last name’s long and I, with the leader of these girls.”

“I CAN’T FIGHT MOONBYUL! BUT I COULD SUGGEST SOMETHING THAT CAN SAVE OUR ING LIVES!” Whee In yelled but held out her fists anyway, awkwardly. But Yuju held up her thumb.

“What is it?!”

“WE ING RUN!”

Before Moonbyul could even put her arms up and let Whee In’s words sink in, a punch landed on her face.

“AH! That hurts! Oh god.” She holds her bloody nose, having the feeling that she could almost passed out.

--

Whee In’s holding an ice bag, placing it on her right cheek. Moonbyul with an ice bag too, placed on her nose. While Yuju, with no bruises or anything was just seated beside her sister.

“I couldn’t believe I just did that.” Whee In said, feeling her soul leaving her body as she sighs. “I’m a criminal.”

Yuju chortles, “You’re great Whee In-unnie, I didn’t know you had it in you. Unlike this sister of mine, she couldn’t even throw a punch.”

Moonbyul just kept mum, she wants to rub in Yuju’s face how she beat Eric Nam’s , but her sister’s right. She really couldn’t throw a punch earlier, because that Mina really knows how to karate!

Goddammit, Yuju.

“Jung Whee In, Moon Byul Yi, Choi Yuju. You can go now.” The officer said while unlocking the cell they are in, and Whee In almost cried because finally she could see again the outside world after being locked in here for five hours. She wipes her imaginary tears and Moonbyul chuckles, putting an arm around her bestfriend while she kicks her younger sister’s .

“Okay, just sign here,” The officer in gray uniform said, pointing to the papers. Moonbyul nodded, picking up the pen to sign on the blank space, next is Whee In then Yuju. “All done. The person who bailed all of you is waiting on the waiting area. Now get your assess out of here.”

The three of them bowed to the officer before leaving, Moonbyul was expecting Taeyeon will be the one to bail them out for she’s the only person she called. Her mother can’t know about this, again. And especially not Solar.

But when they reached the waiting area, Yuju and Moonbyul gulps down hard while Whee In just stared at the woman. The sisters froze in their spot, while Whee In, being the lovable one, approaches the woman and bowed to her to pay respect.

“Good day, Halmoni. I didn’t know you’re here in Seoul.” Whee In was all smiles and even hugs the woman.

“Oh Whee In, the old woman needs to see Seoul too. And it’s quite interesting that I will find the three of you here…” She looks at Moonbyul and Yuju, intensely, “In jail.”

Yuju and Moonbyul shared a look before bowing to their grandma. But when they bowed, a smack landed on their heads. Moonbyul hissed in pain while holding her head and Yuju cussed quietly, rubbing her pained head.

“What are you two doing with your life? Huh?” Their grandmother said, scrutinizing their faces. Especially Moonbyul, who got bruises on her face and there’s even dried blood on her shirt. “My, Moonbyul. You just left Bucheon and you’re a delinquent now?”

“I’m not—“

“And Yuju, look at you. Tsk. Come here, kiss grandma.” Grandma Moon pointed on her cheek.

“Grandma, I’m not a kid anymore! And people are looking.” Yuju tried to hide her face using her fringe, looking around shyly. Whee In inwardly chuckles and Moonbyul continuously placing the ice bag on her nose.

“Yuju.” And that’s the warning tone from her grandma.  Yuju quickly pecks her granny’s cheek and her Grandma Moon has this satisfied smile now. “And you, Moon Byul Yi…why the did you make Yongsun cry?!” Her smile vanishes, gone with the wind when her eyes landed on her eldest granddaughter.

Whee In sighed, see Grandma Moon in Bucheon is the kind halmoni you couldn’t even imagine cursing or yelling but when her feet hits Seoul, it’s like her demon side is coming up. Must be a Moon thing.

Yuju widens her eyes, sending a signal to her grandma not to cuss. Now look who just became an angel.

“Oh come on, I’m no Mother Teresa. Don’t look at me like that Yuju.”

Moonbyul looks down, putting the ice bag in the corner of the table, “Grandma, let’s not talk about that here.”

“Exactly Moonbyul, my eldest granddaughter whom I love but a total . Yongsun is waiting probably waiting in my house and playing with Umji.”

“WHAT?!” The three ladies said in unison, surprised. How the hell did that happen? Did Moonbyul miss anything when she’s in that prison cell? And the answer is yes! Freaking yes! Because her grandmother just called Solar and probably asked her to go to her place to have some tea and her grandmother didn’t tell Solar that Moonbyul is coming. Her grandmother loves surprises.

“Yongsun cannot see me like this, she will go nuts!” Moonbyul pointed to her face and to her shirt, “I’m a mess as you can see, Grandma!”

“You did that to yourself, young lady! Now let’s go retards.” Grandma Moon ordered, the main gizibe, and started to walk away with her cane to support her gait. Yuju immediately held onto her grandma’s arm to support her too. “And don’t worry, your mom didn’t know I’m here. We are all safe…for now. That stupid daughter of mine, she’s messing up this family.”

Moonbyul loudly sighs, closing her eyes for a moment. Whee In taps her shoulder, “Wow. What a turnout of events.”

“Oh goodness, I’m going to see Yongsun.”

“The girl that you’ve missed so much.”

When Whee In said that, Moonbyul immediately let out a small smile. She felt happy but with a tinge of sadness too. Questions are running through her mind, things she wanted to say to her Yongsun, things she wanted to do. She missed the girl so much, she could hug the girl all day and tightly. But the mess with her mother came up on her mind and disappointment came rushing down.

“Yo! Grandma’s waiting! Come here now or she’s going to blast this building!” Yuju shouted from the lobby which causes the two friends to chuckle but the people around them felt fear creeps into their spine and they think it’s a threat to security, they’re in a ing police station.

“Jesus, this family is going to be the death of me.” Moonbyul tiredly said, as they walk up to the waiting Yuju. But Moonbyul phone buzzes indicating that she received a text, she unlocks her phone and Solar’s name pops out.

I know you’re still mad.

But I’m at your grandmother’s house, she’s in Seoul.

And I saw your photo when you were still in pre-school.

And I’m laughing.

Moonbyul laughs but immediately stops as she felt the pain on her busted lips, then another text from Solar again.

I miss you.

So much.

Come back.

Please.

Then another from her, again.

I love you.

--

A/N:

So…  I just heard that MAMAMOO will be having their SOLO CONCERT! Yassssss. Can’t wait for fancams. LOL. Sigh, Korea.

I have seen Solar’s predebut photos, and my friend is telling me that she looks different because of her eyes or cheeks and I’m their like, ‘it’s the hair.’ Hahaaa.  She’s so cute with her glasses!

And 10cm songs…deleted on my playlist…because boy, f.u.

And hold up guys, as much as this fic contains violence! Please, don’t hold a gun. Don’t hurt others. :(

As always, thank you for reading this fic until now. Yay! You’re still here, wink wink.