I can understand what I’ve never known
Do you know what I wanna say now?
I can see what Ive never seen
My destiny ooh ooh

​​​​-Be my Love (Lee Jonghyun)

Jonghyun’s POV

20 days has passed ever since Seungyeon started turning human, that means minus 20 days from her 100 given days before moving on to the next life. Disappearing from this life time. Im scared but she is probably feeling more scared but she always puts on this ‘everything-is-fine’ face and acts like nothing is wrong—but to be honest, I think everything is messed up more than before.
Seulgi still acts like were together, Seungyeon keeps quiet about it, Ah In is still not showing and Im… ugh I don’t know anymore, I don’t know how I should act whether I should go with Seungyeon’s thoughts that I should just go with the flow and live day by day or just tell Seulgi everything just to have her jump on the same ship. I don’t even know how to find Ah In or why I even have the feeling of finding him, its not like he can kill himself twice so why am I even worried about him?

“Oppa, your eyebrows” Hana said pointing to my forehead. We’re playing scrabble with Seungyeon, she just turned human 10 minutes ago and here we are at Hana’s room. Seungyeon looked at me and I met her eyes.

“I was just thinking of what words I should use” I smiled and Hana smiled back, Seungyeon didn’t have any reaction and just went back to look on her letters.

“Its my turn right?” Hana said and Seungyeon and I nodded and Hana fumbled with her letters putting it messily on the board. 

DESTINY

I looked at her word, my heart skipped a beat and as if someone was head locking me with their arm that my head ached. I looked at Seungyeon and she was just staring at the word. Hana was telling me to count her score for her but all I can focus on was Seungyeon. I immediately stood up when I saw a glint on her eyes.

“Hana, Seungyeon and I will just go to the convenience store outside to buy some food. Would you like anything?”

“Is it okay to have ice cream at this hour?” Hana asked and I immediately nodded
“Just don’t tell mom ‘kay?”

“Okay.” Hana nodded and smiled widely

“Seungyeon lets go.” I said and stood her up and grabbed her going out. I let go of her when we were out of the house. We were both walking quietly and she had her head down. “You’ll bump to a post if you keep walking like that.” I stopped walking and looked at her, she looked up at me and I reached out my hand, she looked at it for a while and grabbed it. I squeezed it a little and smiled at her, she displayed a small smile and we continued to walk to the store. 

I grabbed a few chips and drinks and Hana’s ice cream, when I looked at Seungyeon she was just looking at me and for a second I think I know what was going through her head.

She was watching how I move, how I look, how I feel, how we are together. Because I have also thought that, thinking about the day that she will disappear and how it would feel when she is gone. Im hating how she keeps everything to herself, how she acts to be fine when clearly she isn’t. But I also love her for being so strong, I just hope that when she breaks I’ll be there for her.

I paid for our things and went out the store. I made her walk first and wrapped my arms around her giving her a back hug. She stopped for a moment and looked at me and I looked at her, our faces only and inch apart. I gave her a smile and kissed her forehead.

“Just walk forward. I just want to hug you from here.” I started walking and so she did too. I can smell her scent that actually gives me the feeling of being relaxed and happy.

“Im sorry.” She said, her voice low.

“Why are you sorry?”

“For being so down. That’s why you decided to go out right?”

“No, I really did want to buy some food.” 

She stopped walking again. This time I let go and went in front of her, grabbed her shoulders and lowered my stance so my head is on level with her. She spoke first.

"Im slowly realizing that days has been passing by so fast and i only have 80 nights to be human. And whenever i think about it, i feel scared." She was obviously going to cry, but she looked up and took a deep breathe trying to control her emotions.

"Why wont you let yourself cry?" I asked her. She stared at me with big eyes. "Why wont you break down and cry?"

"I-- i dont want to."

"Why?"

"I just dont want to cry and be weak."

"Thats why you're pretending to be strong even if you obviously are at your weakest?" My voice went up higher than normal.

"Why-- why are you angry?" Her voice also went up higher.

"I--im not angry Seungyeon ah." I took a deep breathe and let go of her. "I -- i just hate to see you pretend to be fine when you obviously arent. I love you being so strong and brave, but -- but pretending to be it is stupid and i hate it." I looked up at her and her eyes were welling tears.

"Do you want me to cry?" She whispered. I cupped her cheeks.

"Whether you cry or not is the point Seungyeon ah, my point is-- this isn't your fight alone, being strong by yourself wont do anything when you try to stand up but only end up falling down again. I am here, i can help you, i wont leave you falling down again and again, this is also my story not only yours so stop carrying all the burden and share what is too much for you. Please." I looked down not being strong to look in her eyes as i let go of my emotions. "I love you but you are really really being stupid trying to be strong Seungyeon ah, really stupid." And before i know it, tears also welled down from my eyes and we were both crying in the middle of the street late at night.

"Im s-sorry, i -- i just didnt want anyone to get hurt anymore. I -- i thought i was doing what was b--best for everyone." I pulled her into a hug and she cried in my chest, my crying has stopped and i just hugged her and let her cry since she had been keeping it all this time.

"One cannot solve everyone's problem, so dont burden yourself. Let it all out." I whispered as i bury myself in her neck and she cried more as i hugged her.

We stayed like that for a moment until she calmed down little bit and she broke the hug, i wiped her tears and fixed her hair and as i saw her face, her cheeks and nose was red and her lips looked so soft and warm that i cannot help myself that i leaned in and kissed her.

"Kissing you after crying is half good and half bad."

"Why do you say that?"

"Your lips are soft i cannot help myself to kiss it. But you have snot everywhere." I chuckled and she punched me in the chest, but i saw her slightly smile and i put an arm on her.

"Lets just go, Hana is waiting for her ice cream." Seungyeon said and as we walked again, i kissed her forehead and she looked up at me and gave me a little smile.

And i hope that for the rest of the 80 days left, we can smile like this.

--------
NO ONE's POV

In the same time, Seulgi was awake. Thinking of what ways she can totally drift their story into a different one so the same story wont repeat again in the next life. Only, someone was watching her as she thinks of it.

For the past 10 days, Ah In has been watching Seulgi, but because he cannot hear Seulgi's thought he is only able to read through Seulgi's emotion. Each time Seulgi raises an eyebrow, takes a deep breathe, bites her lip, scratch her head and scream in her pillow-- Ah In can only guess what is going through her mind.

Perhaps, thinking about Jonghyun? But that doesn't convince Ah In. He is sure something else is going on Seulgi's mind. And he made sure to find out what it is.

*beep beep beep beep*

--------------------------
Hi guys! Sorry for taking so long. I'll be honest, i was procrastinating, not because i was lazy (or maybe kinda) but because i think how i wrote the story have totally went in a different way. I never thought it would have involved a lot of characters and angels and everything else. Usually i have an outline of how things should go, but i ended up going with how my brain thought at the very moment i was writing. And then everyone praised me and was getting excited so maybe i wanted to make the story very very amazing that i got pressured.

So as im starting again, i told myself to just write how i used to and just go with my brain's flow like before and not get pressured. Im very thankful to those who really wait and tell me good things, and id really like to thank some friends that really push me to write-- they make me remember that there are people who waits to read what i write. SO THANK YOU VERY MUCH! 

Anyways, what do you think will happen to the 80 days ? :)