You didn’t know how exactly, but somehow, you managed to pack all your things properly and take the bus to school even though you weren’t fully aware of what you were doing. After Junhyung left, you didn’t move from the floor for a few minutes but then you got up, packed your assignment and left the house. It was as if you were on auto-pilot. What scared you though was that you didn’t cry. After all the things that he had said and the way he behaved towards you, you thought that you would be hysterical the moment he left. But you weren’t. It wasn’t that you refused to let yourself cry, but you just couldn’t. There were no tears. It was almost as if you were nothing but an empty shell.

You arrived to class earlier than usual but your Professor was already there so you decided to hand in your report first. Soojin hadn’t arrived yet so you headed to your seat and waited for her to join you. You didn’t want to worry Soojin so you tried your best to act like you would normally do. By the time Soojin had arrived, the lecture had already started so you couldn’t talk to Soojin. Instead of thinking about the whirlwind of events that had taken place, you chose to focus all your attention on the lecture. In fact, you were so intent on listening to the lecture that you missed the way Soojin constantly eyed you throughout the entire time.

“Yah. Will you tell me already?” Soojin nudged you when the both of you were finally alone after class. The both of you had just bought sandwiches from the cafeteria and were settling down at one of the many tables peppered around the campus.

“Hm?” You raised your eyebrows and tried your best to pretend that you didn’t know what she was talking about.

“Oh come on, ------ah. I know you and I know that something happened. Now spill it.” She narrowed her eyes and looked at you threateningly, a small smile playing on her lips.

You raised your hands in defeat. “Ok ok. You win. Something did happen. But I’ll fill you in while we eat ok? I didn’t have breakfast and I’m starving!”

Soojin continued to eye you suspiciously for a few extra seconds before she started to tear open her sandwich packaging. You copied her actions and took a bite of your sandwich, chewing slowly before swallowing just as slowly, deliberately trying to stall for time. Eventually, you couldn’t delay any longer and began recounting the events that took place. Soojin managed to remain rather calm throughout the time you took, choking only once when you had revealed that you had slept with Junhyung but quickly regaining her composure. However, when you finished telling her about his reaction after and what he had said to you, you were surprised to see that she had balled up her fists and clenched her jaw.

You had never seen her like this before and it frightened you a little. “Unni, I know I screwed it up this time. Please don’t be mad.” You whimpered.

“Wait. You just told me that Junhyung showed up at your doorstep drunk, after disappearing for over a year, and tricked you into sleeping with him. Then woke up and blamed you for everything and you think that I’m mad at you?!” She snapped, abruptly incredulous.

“Unni! Shhh!! Not so loud!” You snapped your head around quickly to see if anyone had heard her. Thankfully, it seemed like no one had. “Why are you upset then?” You asked, hesistantly.

“Look, I’m not saying that I’m not mad at you, because I am.” She said pointedly. You cringed. “But I’m beyond upset with Junhyung right now and I’m also worried about you.” You looked up expectantly. “How are you holding up?” She asked, clearly concerned.

You groaned inwardly. You knew that she would ask this question but it still didn’t make answering it any easier. “In be honest, I don’t really know how I’m feeling right now. When he left, I expected myself to break down but all I felt was pain. My heart hurt so badly but I didn’t cry. I just feel empty inside. Am I making any sense?”

Thankfully, Soojin nodded. You were relieved that you didn’t have to try and explain yourself again. “I understand. I’m actually quite glad you’re not crying. I think you cried enough the last time. Someone who makes you cry that much without even feeling bad about it, doesn’t deserve you. Promise me you’ll be strong alright?” She reached across the table to put her hand over yours.

“I promise, Unni.” You tried to smile but it came out looking more like a grimace.