Explanation
Fall For YouHe got home earlier than I did. I saw the light already on in his pool house when I arrived to my room. I just stood there staring into it; I wasn’t sure if I was looking for him, or just waiting for him to acknowledge he knew I was there.
And then he saw me. His face looked torn up and just as upset as I was on the inside. Our eyes caught each other, but then the fury came rising up from within me, and I pulled my curtains shut. I knew he was probably reading my thoughts right now, and at this point I didn’t really care. He’s been looking into them for awhile now and he didn’t care.
How dare he think he can tell me how I feel? I just laid in my bed, extremely angry. He knew how I felt, he knew that I was falling for him, and he just decided to make the decision for us, pushing me away. I couldn’t help think, what the hell has been going on for the past couple of months, the way he looked at me. I knew he never looked at just anybody the way he looked at me.
Whatever, I told myself. Nothing started, therefore nothing had to end. I guess I should thank him, for stopping ourselves from feeling future heartbreak. But then again, how do I know it would’ve ended in heartbreak. How do I know that this could’ve been something amazing?
The next morning, I woke up early and went through my drawers. I remembered making an extra car key somewhere in my room. Aha! I found it. I wasn’t going to see Gerald today because I was going to drive myself to school today. If he thought I wasn’t good enough for him, or he wasn’t good enough for me, than nothing he did was good enough for me.
I took the car to school, and left a note to Mom. I had to make sure that I left before he woke up.
I didn’t tell anyone about the night before, not even Erich, though I knew she knew something was up. I could feel the desperation when she asked me what was the matter. I shrugged off her question, and told her it didn’t even matter, because I didn’t care about what happened, though that was the farthest from the truth.
After school, I followed Mel to the studio where everyone was meeting for dance rehearsals. The dance teacher arrived, and good thing she had an assistant because Gerald was late. The assistant was hot, in a young, dark, and mysterious type of way. I laughed, isn’t that what attracted me to Gerald in the first place. But it wasn’t like I was going to marry the damn guy; I just needed him to show off once Gerald arrived. And I knew he was going to arrive.
I kept my eyes on the door, so when I saw him meet my eye, I quickly looked away to my replacement partner. I cleared my throat, “So am I doing this okay?” I asked him.
The teacher looked at me smiling, “Looks like you’re a natural, but you need to get closer to your partner.”
I pressed my body against his, and stared in the direction of Gerald whose jaw tensed and I think I heard his knuckles cracking. I smiled, “Like this?”
“Just like that,” he said, his grin growing bigger.
“Okay, I’m here. What did I miss?” Gerald put his hand on the guy’s chest and shoved him away.
“Gerald, you can’t do that, we were dancing, right in the middle of the lesson.” I glared at him.
The assistant moved to the side, “We were just doing some of the basic foot work, would you like me to show you?”
Gerald laughed, and took his place in front of me, supporting my arm and one hand on my back, “No thanks, we have it from here.”
I gave the assistant a charming smile and watched him walk away to another couple in complete satisfaction. I had Ge in the palm of my hand. “I can’t believe you stole the car, do you know I was so close to calling the cops?
“The cops wouldn’t have done anything, it’s my car to begin with, and I didn’t steal anything. I left a note to Mom, she didn’t tell you?” Our legs moved swiftly to the music. Apparently, I was still a natural, or maybe it was Gerald leading me.
“Right, yeah after she left in the morning before I woke up. Do you know long it took for me to figure out this place? You even took my invitation,” he muttered.
I laughed, “Yeah, that was pretty mean. I only did it because if you missed the practice, then maybe I could convince Mel to hook me up with someone else. That teacher assistant is pretty good with his hands.”
He stuck his foot out, and I tripped over it. I almost fell flat on my face but he caught me in his arm and pulled me back up. Everyone stared, “Two left feet,” he told them, and then stared at me. “Like that? You think Mr. Ballerina could do that.
I faked a laugh and stepped on his foot with my heel. He groaned in pain, “If I didn’t know any better, that would be jealousy in your voice. Oh wait, why would you be jealous, you’re ended it.”
“There was nothing to end, right? You said it yourself last night, I was sparing us from future heartbreak.” He said, pushing me out with one hand and then pulling me back in, slamming my chest against his hard one.
“Ugh, do you always have to inflict pain to everyone you meet?” I asked him, glaring into his eyes. I wasn’t going to give into those big, dark, brown…y eyes. I wasn’t going to stand my ground, even if I was seconds from falling.
“Right, like you trying to make me jealous with you dancing with that guy who’s gay, I might add.” He retorted.
I stared at him who was checking out Matt. I laughed. “Wait, how do you know I was trying to make you jealous? I was really intrigued with how he taught me how to dance.” I tried to cover up.
He laughed, “Mind-reading, remember? I had to go through every thing in that thick head of yours to find this place.” We stopped from the bickering, and the music switched up to a more slow-tempo, y, Latin music. “I think we’re supposed to get real close, remember your gay crush?”
I rolled my eyes, and felt his hand on my back push me against him. My breath grew shallow, and I was beginning to feel light-headed. Was it hot in here, or what? I tightened my grip around his shoulders, and we were face to face, like seriously face-to-face.
I was following his lead, his footwork doing all the work, guiding me across the floor, ignoring the teacher’s instruction. He was extremely good on the dance floor. Who needed teachers when you had Gerald. Was there anything he didn’t know how to do? “Not really,” he answered my question with a smirk.
He spun me around, and dipped me low, his hands traveling down my back to support. He lifted me up with his face never getting more than two centimetres away, his face was so close, I could smell his cool breath on my face. “You look beautiful,” he whispered, staring at my summer dress.
I stepped away from him, “You can’t just say that, Ge. After last night.”
He gave me his smile that I grew irresistible to, “Calm down, Kim. It’s not like you to reject a compliment.” He grabbed my hand back, and we continued to dance to the music.
The rest of the night went by slowly, and Gerald snatched the keys from me before we entered the car. “You don’t get to drive while I’m here. Did you forget the rules?” He slammed the door shut.
I shook my head, “Whatever, I was just pissed off at you for what happened last night.” I rested my head against the door.
“Look, about last night, I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
I sighed, “Okay, stop with that crap. I hate it when guys say that, ‘I didn’t mean to hurt you,’ well, you did, so don’t apologize and get on with it. Why’d you do it, and even though you did, why that night? Why then? Why not two months ago after that thunderstorm?”
He laughed, “If only it was that simple. Just like you said all those months ago, I still feel, I still have emotions, Kim. And you are you too pretty a guy could handle. That night, I was going to do something that I knew I was going to regret if something ever happened.”
He was going to kiss me, I thought.
“But thank goodness, I didn’t.”
I smiled, “You know, someone once told me that we already had our first kiss,” I reminded him.
He chuckled, “And I think I was told that that one didn’t count. You deserve more, Kim. You may not know that now, but you do. And what if I can’t give that to you?”
I nodded, finally understanding, “What if you can?”
It was too serious, so I pushed him head away playfully, messing up his hair, “Just drive,” we laughed and he started the engine. I guess I could live with it, arguing with Gerald; because making up with him is extremely fun. We were back to our old selves laughing at our crummy jokes, and wanting something neither of us couldn’t have.
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