This time we're not giving up
Let's make it last forever
Screaming "hallelujah"
We'll make it last forever

- Hallelujah, Paramore

“Come with me, Jun.”

It was a final ultimatum.

Hyunseung clearly emphasized for Junhyung to understand their situation—is not going to be like from before anymore. Too much damage has been caused and if Junhyung wanted to stay and be with him, he must learn to sacrifice as well. Not that Hyunseung demands but he rather be a little selfish after all the troubles he went through.

He has all the right to set at least a beneficial option for his part. He had so much enough of sufferings and heartaches, the most that he can do is to think for once about his own happiness.

Of course he wanted to be with Junhyung but he is not obligating for the other to choose him. Junhyung still has his choice whether to stay or leave but this will be the last time for him to gain his chance. Hyunseung had been lenient all this time because he loves Junhyung so much but if he really wanted a relationship to last this time; he must gain an assurance from Junhyung first. And if the other may not give it to him, unfortunately he must continue and go on with what is waiting ahead for him in New York. It will hurt, but he had so much of that already. He was so sick of being the victim and just weeping around the corner.

With or without Junhyung, he must continue his life.

“I know I already lose all the right to even show my face to you.”

He looked up from the bench were he seated with Gikwang, Geurim and his mom at his other side to only see Dujun staring at him with an apologetic look.

“Seung, I wanted to apologize. I never meant to lie to you.”

Hyunseung stand up slowly and moved towards somewhere with no people for them to have their privacy where Dujun silently followed him.

He stared at Dujun again but this time with confused feelings. He is not sure if he is still mad at him or if even for the last time, the other made sure to see him at least.

“I really don’t know what to say, Dujunie.”

“I understand. I deserve that, really.” Dujun replied with a sad smile.

“I was hurt. You know very well how I feel about Junhyung leaving me yet you still did it. I felt betrayed not because of the actual lying but because I considered you one of my best friends and you chose to stab me at the back.”

“Seungie, it’s not like that.” Dujun replied in defense. “Yes, I admit that I hid the truth from you about not being in contact with my cousin but never ever think that I didn’t value our friendship.” He added. “Or my feelings for you. Everything I showed you is true and genuine. I’m not even asking for you to return my feelings even though I had the chance to steal you away from Junhyung. Not even for you to forgive me but only for you to please, at least believe me that I really do care and love you and it was never my intention to hurt you. I only did it to protect you.”

“That’s what he said to me too. Junhyung said he only wanted to protect me.”

“His father is really a cruel bastard if he wanted to be. We thought it’s the only option we had to protect you from his filthy hands.”

“You could’ve at least told me.”

“And what? To look at you only blaming yourself for not being enough for him? That won’t happen, Seungie.”

“But at least I may not end up being paranoid all the time searching for answers as to why did he really leave me! You have no idea how hard it is to be completely left hanging with nothing to hold unto!”

“Junhyung will rather choose to be the bad guy in your life than he will witness you destroy yourself just because of a stupid reason of not being enough for him. Think about of everything he sacrificed for you. You’re not the only one who was hurt—who is hurting still.” Dujun’ voice cracked in the end and Hyunseung is sure that the other is already close to burst into tears.

“I know you.  You will not stop blaming yourself until you’ll feel satisfied that you already deserve what is right for you. And maybe when that time comes, we will have you cold and lying lifeless. And it will only break Junhyung more if that ever happens.”

“And it still happened. It’s inevitable for my part unfortunately.”

“That’s why I kept it from him. I don’t want him to think that this is his entire fault because it is not. As much as how cliché and annoying it sounds, the both of you are quite similar with your personalities. He will only end up blaming his self for hurting you. Not that he is not already doing it.”

“But I told him.”

Dujun widened his eyes in surprise.

“You did what? Oh God, if he will not end being ballistic at his father, maybe he is already locking his self inside his room finding ways to end his life. That little ..”

Dujun went into panic mode in a sudden and it leaves Hyunseung simply confused.

“Hello? Where are you?” Dujun sighed in relief on his phone where Hyunseung guessed that has Junhyung on the other line.

“What are you going to do?”

“Do you know Hyunseung is leaving Seoul in less than an hour now?”

“I see. Is he already aware of that?”

“Man, I don’t want to lie again. Whatever. Tell it to him yourself. Bye and take care.”

Dujun faced him again but he is a little anxious than before.

“Is that Junhyung? What did he say?”

“He said for you to wait for him.”

Hyunseung immediately felt the hope rising in his chest since Junhyung haven’t gave him an answer last night. Although they quite fixed and talked about what happened to them, there is still no definite label as to what are they now. Are they even friends? Or lovers? He doesn’t know. It is hard to tell when Junhyung keeps on giving him bizarre answers and it only makes his chest tighten and not linger in the possibility that they still have their chance to reunite and be with in each other’s arms again.

That alone made him grip to a silly hope of Junhyung coming back.

He doesn’t know why when it comes to Junhyung he will suddenly lose his coherence and stability.

“I wish you the best then.” And now Dujun smiled at him sincerely. “If only I can follow you in New York too but you won’t allow me I know.”

“I’m sorry for being an earlier, Dujunie.”

“I deserved that.” Dujun chuckled. “What time is your flight anyway?”

“I think the boarding gates will open soon. Not more than fifteen minutes from now.”

“Are you ready? I mean, if you ever need someone or something don’t hesitate to approach me. I’m only a call away and perhaps I’ll come to you if needed.”

“Thank you, really.  I owe you a lot. All of you.” Hyunseung’s gaze travelled from him then unto the people who were waiting at the bench with him earlier. Gikwang who is surprisingly with Jiyong now at his side, his loving mom and his annoying sister who he still loves so much. Apparently Teamin wished to come as well but Hyunseung insisted that the students are not supposed to be held from the dance class. It was hard to say farewell to them but it must happen. Step by step, slowly and surely, he is on the right way to move on.

“Hyunseung-oppa!”

Hyunseung turned his way only to face a frantic and approaching Hara.

“I heard from a lonely bird that you’re leaving Seoul today.”

“And where is that lonely bird now?”

“Wait for him oppa.” Hara said with so much hope in her being.

“I can wait for him but I’m afraid the plane will not.” Hyunseung frowned.

“Believe when he said that he will come with you.” Hara said sternly. When this woman wanted to be intimidating, hell she surely can.

“But he never said that.” Hyunseung immediately wanted to wipe the rising hope in his chest.

“He said it to me. He won’t let you go. Not this time. Not ever again.”

“I really want to believe you.” Hyunseung stared at her with a frown. “But how can I? I can’t even see his shadow or feel his warm arms around me. Tell me how? I’m so tired of being left behind, Hara. I don’t need another empty promise that could only kill me.”

“I’m sorry.” And Hara embraced him tightly causing for Hyunseung to be quite surprised. “I’m just really hoping for you two to be together again. I hate to see you both hurting where in you don’t deserve every pain you’re feeling now.” Her voice is muffled by her sobs on Hyunseung’s shoulders.

“Maybe someday, Hara. Maybe someday.”

Hyunseung tells her and at the same time to his self.

Yes, maybe someday—the day will come too—where he and Junhyung will live with no worries but only with love and compassion for each other.

It’s too much to ask, Hyunseung knows and so he is only left hoping in silence.

Flight BST1023 to New York, gates H1 and H2 are now ready for passengers to board.

Hyunseung caught that to be his flight.

This is it. There is no turning back now. From now on, he will not be the old Hyunseung anymore. This time he will walk with head held high and much stronger than before. Life taught him to be hard and so he won’t disappoint.

One by one, Hyunseung bid them farewell and all of them wish him luck and the best. He will leave everything that is hurting him in this city. As well as the only man he ever fell in love.

Happy ending doesn’t always happen. Yet a much better and reasonable one is enough to survive.

It is so much easier to not expect things to happen anymore.

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Thankfully Hyunseung transferred in Bronx Dance Academy just in time. A great two weeks earlier from summer break actually before school starts again. The last five days he spent familiarizing the city and most importantly his new teaching ground. This will be a challenge again for him because this time he is going to teach college students who are interested to have a serious career in the arts of dancing. And who is he to deny? It will only be an honor for his part to help the aspiring ones.

And only on the first day of his tour, he already met an amazing person that goes by the name of Kim Hyuna. She is a Korean too and teaches ballet in the same academy. It made him much easier to adjust and not feel alone all the time. So far, New York is treating him good and right. Well he hopes for it to last because he can’t remember the last time he ever felt so laid back again. There are still times that he can’t help but think about Junhyung but this time, he only thinks about their happy times. It will take a while before he can fully move on but he is trying his very best to do so.

His mom and Geurim call him every day. Cons