(82.5) Entry 20 - Brighter Than Tears by tinkersoo
The Beauty and The Wolves || Writing Contest [Closed]
Title of Entry: Brighter Than Tears
Participant: tinkersoo
Pairing Used: seolay
Prompt Used: Song Prompt #10
Judge: layseokris
Title: 8/10
-I don't know if what I'm going to say is accurate or what but, I do think that the title implies that the love they have for each others are brighter than their tears (which signifies the obstacle they have been facing). It's still a little blurr, for me, (I do await for your view on this hahah!) but the title itself is interesting. :)
Storyline: 16/20
-I just realie that the story's a modernized version of EXO's Baby Don't Cry. So in terms of originality, it's not really that much original. However, it is indeed creative because, at least, you have revised it into a not-so-fairy-tale like (LOL HAHAH!). I appreciate that of course! I guess you already know the fact that the little mermaid storyline is already overused here in aff XD
Grammar: 23/25
-Some very few, very small flaws but I don't think it's not that visible when reading. If ever there's a problem, it' on subject-verb agreement. Few more practices, I know you can make a perfect score! :)
Flow of Story: 18/30
-It's short (lol, sorry for being too straightforward, your entry is the last one so I'm kind of getting excited to post the winners, hahah! sorry T.T) Anyway, short fics aren't really that bad. Actually, I really appreciate drabbles and oneshots, promise! However, in regards to how it flows, it kind of gets complicated. Since short fics are to show only one part.scene of the story-the development isn't really that good. You actually don't lack details either. I mean, your entry don't contain just dialogues from the charcaters but alo some figurative lines and good narration. However, again, it only shows the very ending of the story. Like, it's only a part of the whole. No worries! I do love your last two paragraphs. It's so sad yet so beautiful at the same time. I then think that vulnerability also suits seolay! Thank you :)
Bonus Points:
-seolay as main (2 Points)
-seolay as main (Individual Scoring-3 Points)
-uses song prompt #10 (1 Point)
From glamzchic:
-seolay as main (2 Points)
-seolay as main (Individual Scoring-3 Points)
Total Score from layseokris: 76
Judge: immakpoploverable
Title: 10/10
Storyline: 16/20
Grammar: 24/25
Flow of Story: 23/30
Bonus Points:
-seolay as main (2 Points)
-seolay as main (Individual Scoring-3 Points)
-angst as genre (Individual Scoring-3 Points)
-uses song prompt #10 (Individual Scoring-3 Points)
From glamzchic:
-seolay as main (2 Points)
-seolay as main (Individual Scoring-3 Points)
Total Score from immakpoploverable: 89
Scores: 89 Points (Aida) + 76 Points (Anne)
Final Score: 82.5
*Do notify us if you find some miscalculations
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