Title of Entry: First & the Last Spring

Participant: syizi93

Pairing used: seoyeol 

Prompts Used: Quote Prompt #7, Picture Prompt #5, Song Prompt #6, Lyric Prompt #3

Judge: layseokris

Title: 6/10

-Well, obviously, the words "first" and "last" in your title depict a starting and ending point. I personally love the title, it conveys the plot and so the readers will have their own preview. Though, I can only give six points because, the title is just a bit common and I think there's a conflict with the use of a definite article (?) :)

Storyline: 14/20

-Honestly, there are lots of fanfics having the same storyline. Some may find it very tiring-but honestly, being the crybaby I am, I will cry again and again, even over the same plotline. As long as the author is able to put good details and well-rounded characters, I'll spill my tears for the same the-character-has-cancer-and-dies thing-y. Especially when reading the other half who remains alive-just like how Chanyeol reminsces his first and last spring with Seohyun <3 But yeah, the key for a good storyline is creativity. Most of our stories, in this modern period, are inspired from the classic stories in the past. (That's why plagiarism is too complicated to start with) 

-Let's all be honest that the rules set for English language is complex and...ugh, continuous in revision? Like, it keep updating and updating for the corrections because well, nothing is really permanent. Plus, I'm not a native speaker so I'm really not going to be too strict on this. Since I'm studying Basic Communication Skills in English 1, I'll just share some few tips.

For some few readers, the mistakes on the subject-verb agreement of your paragraphs won't be that much of a big deal. But it's important for cohesion of your fic. Also, the usage of definite and indefinite articles-especially in your title. It seems like "Last" is more distinct than "First". I don't know if that's intended though....

Flow of Story: 18/30

-I'm just a bit disappointed because you have ended it too suddenly. Why so fast-paced? T.T But yeah, getting back on a serious mode, I think the characters lack development. Like, suddenly Seohyun appears in the scene and announces her engagement which then makes Chanyeol sad. Then after two weeks, she tells him that she breaks the engagement off. Again, all of a sudden, they become together. Then Chanyeol discovers that Seohyun has cancer and the next thing we all know, she dies peacefully-a little too peacefully. HAHA!

In regards to the quote prompt you have used, I can say that Chanyeol pretty messed up with his first love. I personally love how you apply Seohyun's quote in your entry <3 And as I have interpreted it, both Chanyeol and Seohyun are careless with their first loves. Seohyun engages herself with someone who has seen another girl after two weeks while Chanyeol immediately seperates himself away from Seohyun just because she's already engaged with someone else.

Though, for the lyric prompt, I feel like the usage is somehow shallow? Actually, Chanyeol kind of folds when Seohyun announces her engagement. But later, he has realized that he must take the opportunity in confessing to her. On the other hand, I think that you only want to show that Chanyeol respects Seohyun to that extent-he's even shy for confessing right after.

Bonus Points: 

-seoyeol as main (2 points)

-quote prompt #7 (3 points)

-picture prompt #5 (2 points)

-lyric prompt #3 (1 point)

From glamzchic:

-seoyeol as main (2 points)

-seoyeol as main (Individual Scoring-2 Points)

Total Score from layseokris: 70

Judge: immakpoploverable

Title: 7/10

Storyline: 9/20

Grammar: 18/25

Flow of Story: 20/30

Bonus Points:

-seoyeol as main (2 points)

-seoyeol as main (3 points - individual scoring)

-writing on angst (3 points)

-quote prompt #7 (3 points)

-picture prompt #5 (3 points)

-song prompt #6 (3 points)

-lyric prompt #3 (3 points)

From glamzchic:

-seoyeol as main (2 points)

-seoyeol as main (Individual Scoring-2 Points)

Total Score from immakpoploverable: 78

Scores: 78 Points (Aida) + 70 Points (Anne)

Average: 74 + early bonus point (2 Points)

Final Score: 76

*Do notify us if you find some miscalculations