Taemin’s POV

“Key?” I called out sounding slightly breathless after practically running almost the entire journey from home.

His body froze when he heard me calling for him. It took him a second longer than usual to turn around with a forced smile on his face.

“Taeminnie? What’re you doing here?”

Shouldn’t I be asking you that, Key umma? I thought. “I was just going home from the music store.” I said smoothly and flashed him the latest SHINee album I bought as evidence but the truth was I had gotten it delivered to me yesterday.

“Oh,” he muttered. “Um…I suddenly felt like taking some fresh air so I decided to use the longer way home.” He was drawing circles on the ground with his foot while he said it and I knew that he was lying. Key umma was never a good liar in the first place. He always gives himself away. Whenever he tried to tell a lie, he would tend to draw circles with either his fingers or his foot. It was a habit he had even before the memory loss. Anyway, I hate the fact that he still tried to lie just to come here for a certain someone. Could he be in the process of regaining his memories like I had feared?

“Oh.” I didn’t know what else to say. “Can I walk with you, Key umma?” I asked innocently, pretending to have swallowed his lie even though I was hurt that he still couldn’t trust me completely knowing that I was his only companion in this world right now. Well, of course, if he had told me, I would do anything and everything to not let Kim Jonghyun anywhere near him. I would even book an immediate flight out of this country if I had to.

His face lit up with a true smile as he took the bait. “Of course you can.”

I smiled back at him and let my eyes trail to the side lane of the condominium I just found out a couple of minutes ago to be Jonghyun’s house. There stood my less than helpful informant concealed in the darkness of the alley silently watching Key and me. He definitely owes me an explanation for this one. When he noticed that I was looking at him, I nodded in his direction as a sign of acknowledgement and he nodded back before coming out of the shadows and heading towards the entrance of the condominium.

“Taeminnie? What’re you looking at?”

 I waited until he had disappeared into the building before looking back at Key. ‘It was nothing. I just spotted someone that reminded me of another person I dislike. Anyway, let’s go home and play this. I can teach you the dance steps if you want.”

“Really? I love the song Lucifer so so much! I especially adore the rapper with the side of his head shaved. He’s so cool and hot! He makes me jealous,” he pouted.

I laughed at his fanboy-like-words. “Don’t worry, Key umma! You’re a thousand times beter than him. Now let’s go! Let’s go! Go! Go! We have a long walk ahead of us in the beautiful starlight,” I said as I skipped in a circle around him.

When we reached home half an hour later, I have got another message from him.

It read:

Good job

    Choi Minho

Minho’s POV

Jonghyun had gone back to the way he was when Kibum first broke up with him. He doesn’t come to school anymore so I had to come up with believable reasons to cover for his absences. Onew was worried sick about Jonghyun but didn’t dare to contact him. He doesn’t want to have to call Jonghyun and stammer a few unintelligible words of comfort which might only make matters worse because Jonghyun hates sympathy from people whether be it from people he knows or complete strangers. His ego is just too big to accept it. Let's leave t at that for now. However, Onew still found a way to channel his worries. He does it by glaring at me at every opportunity and constantly reminded me that it was my entire fault for Jonghyun’s absence in school. This makes it awkward between the two of us since Onew couldn’t stop blaming me and I wouldn’t tell him my reason for saying it so tactlessly to Jonghyun no matter how many times he had pleaded and begged on his knees. You see, even if he was the clumsiest person alive, he is actually quite the brilliant mind. He just doesn’t understand that I can never tell anyone because my plan only has a 40% probability of success and if I did tell him, that would well be the end of our friendship.

Besides not going to school, Jonghyun doesn’t answer calls, either. I could be ringing his phone a hundred times a day and still, he refuse to pick up. Hell. I think he would most likely throw it against a wall in anger if I did that so I never called more than once a day but I would make a trip to his house every day after school to check on him even if he wouldn’t let me in. He couldn’t stop me from entering, anyway but I’m not foolish to want to confront him when he’s in that condition. I would just ask about him from his employees and left my school homework behind for him to copy. However, on the third day of his isolation, he had chased away all his employees and so I haven’t been there for the past three days already.

I planned to go there today after first checking on Key.

I had been watching him for hours as he worked thrice as hard to cover up for me in the café. At one point, I was on the verge of barging in there and throw on an apron to begin work immediately but in the end, I couldn’t because I don’t think I can face him after what I had said to Jonghyun. I had played with his life and claimed him dead when he was well and alive just so I could achieve what I want. I had destroyed my very best friend and yet, I was not feeling remorseful enough. I did not feel guilty at all for what I have done. In fact, i felt satisfied after accomplishing the initial stage of my plan.

Sometimes, I feel like I am a cold-blooded animal with an oversized brain capacity but no heart.

When all the customers had left and soon after, the workers, Key finally comes out of the changing room as Kibum and closed the shop like he does every other day. He straightened up after he had secured the locks on the shutters and stood there for almost a minute looking up and down the road. I knew instantly that he was thinking of going to check on Jonghyun and I secretly smiled to myself. True enough, he went down the road leading away from his house to Jonghyun’s.

My plan was working out the way I want it to, after all.

I quietly followed a few steps behind him so as to not raise suspicions. When we were about ten minutes away from Jonghyun’s place, I made a phone call.

“Hello?” answered a bright sing song voice.

“Taemin. It’s Minho.”

Silence greeted me from the other side of the line.

“I know who you are. What do you want, now?” the cheerful tone was gone and replaced with a cold one.

I remained unfazed. “Have you heard of the SM’s exclusive condominium?”

“Yeah. What about it?”

“It’s where he lives and Key’s going there now,” I said before disconnecting the call.

I took one last look at Kibum’s back before turning away from the road and used the shortcut to Jonghyun’s house so I could reach before he does. I managed to find myself another good hiding spot as I waited for Kibum and Taemin to appear. When the latter was nowhere in sight even though Kibum was already standing in front of the condominium, looking up to see Jonghyun’s house, I was so close to revealing myself and come up with an excuse to prevent him from going into the building. It was a lucky thing that he showed up at the very last minute and managed to pull Kibum away without me having to interfere. After ensuring that he had the task under control, I left him to it as I prepared myself to face a worse scene.

I scanned a metallic card against the reader and waited for the system to process the details in the card’s microchip.

“Employee Jung Yunho. Closet organiser,” said the computerised voice and the door clicked open to admit me.

I smirked at my own brilliance and placed the card back into my wallet. Coming to Jonghyun’s house will not be a problem anymore from now onwards. The only problem will be to face him and not know what to do best to get him to move on knowing that I was the one that had put him in this situation. I paused for a second outside the doors before giving myself a nod and headed straight to the furthest room in the house, ignoring the mess of broken china and over turned furniture along the way.

I stopped outside the door and decided to knock (for the first time in my life) before I enter.

I gave the door two short raps. “Jonghyun?”

I listened hard for any sign of movement but there was none. Pushing the door slightly ajar, I peeped inside to find the room empty. I pushed it all the way back and entered the room.

“Hyung?” I scanned the room from left to right for any sign of him and that was when I saw the one thing that made my heart stop.

“NO!”

Jonghyun’s POV

Listen to this! (Jonghyun -So Goodbye)

He’s gone.

He’s gone for good.

He’s never coming back.

You’re all alone.

These sickening thoughts kept haunting me whether or not I was sleeping. Every time I had nothing on my mind, they would fill the empty spaces and drive me crazy. The nightmares no longer come in fixed times. It comes even when I had my eyes wide open. There was a constant battle raging in my head between the voice that told me to move on with life and make it up to all the people as well as the dreams that I had abandoned all those years versus the voice that told me life has no meaning anymore. The birds no longer chirp. The sun no longer shines. The laughter no longer sounds. Life is simply black and grey. Meaningless. Dead.

I know that I was going crazy. I couldn’t stop myself throwing anything that was breakable. I had to push everything off a table to the ground and hear the satisfactory breaking sound of countless priceless possessions. I fired all the servants in my house. I yelled at them when they tried to clean up the mess that I had made and pushed them out myself shouting that they can never come back. I felt a tiny bit better being left alone in the midst of all the chaos I had created but it was short lived. I didn’t bother to take care of my image anymore. I let myself go unkempt and I refuse to change out of Kibum’s very favourite sweater. It was all I wore for a week.

At one point of my psychotic break down, I had thought of going to the café. I had thought of seeing Key there and talking to her. She resembles Kibum so much that I thought just looking at her would be more than enough for me. I thought that it will help be my temporary painkiller but when I thought of Minho being there, I gave up on the small hope altogether. I don’t think I can bring myself to face him anymore after punching and yelling at him for no valid reason. If there was anything in this world that could still mean something to me, it was the bond Minho and I share. No matter how big a fight we get into, we will always come together again. We are like brothers separated by blood but connected by destiny and chance. I always felt myself lucky to have met Minho and have him as my friend but I also hated myself for continuously relying on him in life.

When I was not busy destroying everything in my house, I was pulled up against myself in bed crying my eyes out like a pathetic sissy but I didn’t care. I don’t give a damn what people might think if they saw me because these people will never understand the lengths of my love for Kibum.

I dragged myself out of bed and across the room to my study table. I felt nothing even when I accidentally stepped on glass pieces lying all around the room. I pushed all the mess of paperwork off the table and took out the small box I had in my pocket all week long. I took the delicate chain with a ring at the end of it out of the box. This was supposed to be his engagement ring. I had organised everything that night to propose to him but I was too late. Before I could wait till the dinner to see him, he had already called me out in the afternoon and announced his wish for a break up.  I clenched it tightly in my fist as I walked to the balcony. Kibum used to love dragging me here to enjoy the gorgeous night view together as he cuddled against my chest.

At times, I felt stupid and useless for drowning myself in this pointless love. I asked myself what benefit would I get for wallowing in self-pity and if he was going to come back to me if I kept torturing myself like this. I know it’s an idiocy to be in a one-sided love relationship but I can’t help falling in love with his character and personality. I can’t help being head over heels for him. I just can’t. In the end of the day, after all the unanswered questions I had fired at myself, there was only one that mattered above all else. It was only one debate that tears me apart however I decide to tackle it.

Why am I still here when he isn’t?

did any of you guess correctly? 

are you starting to hate Minho? lol~

comments pls~ ^^