I shifted uneasily in the chair. The grip became tighter, I was nervous.

“Miss Lee? I’m sorry, Mrs Cho Rae Young? What can I do for you?” Kyuhyun’s family doctor, Park Ji Ra asked me as I sat in front of her. She was Kyuhyun’s best friend in university; I heard they once dated previously but the relationship was too awkward for them that they broke off after a week.  However, they remained as good friends and their relationship is one that is clear cut and straight forward. Ji Ra and I became close really quickly and I was happy to have found another good friend and I had no problems with their relationship.

I described all the incidents I had with my vision blurring and shifting and the gray spots that shown up whenever I had a huge headache.

“We might need to do a scan. Come with me.” She said.

“How is it? Is everything fine? Am I alright? What is wrong with me?” I asked franticly as I sat back at the chair after a few scans and tests.

Ji Ra looked through the document that was in front of her as she flipped through the pages.

With a firm line on her lips, she looked back at me. “Did you tell Kyuhyun about your problem?” She said.

I shook my head.

“Rae Young, you trust me right?” She was clicking her pen repeatedly.

“Why? Is there something wrong? What is wrong with me? Tell me! Quick!” I said as I snatched the document away from her.

“You are at the end of stage one eye cancer!” She said in a dense tone.

Time stopped.

“Whaaaat?” I said as I dropped the document. “Are you kidding? Is that true?”

“I ask you one more time, do you believe me? Do you trust me?”

I refused to believe that I would get eye cancer. No one in the family tree died of cancer, why did I get it? How did I get it? Why must it be me? I refused to believe so. All this time, the headaches I was getting, the blurred vision, the gray spots, it’s because of eye cancer? I don’t want to believe.  But Ji Ra’s face confirmed everything.

“You can’t let Kyu know about this. Do you understand? He must not find out about this, promise me?! Ji Ra! He must not find out about this!” I begged her.

“I won’t tell him. As a doctor, I have to keep it confidential. But as a friend….” She was helpless too.

“No.” I shook my head, tears b at the corners. “You are not allowed to tell him anything about my condition. You understand?”

Kyuhyun and I haven’t even reached a year of our marriage and problems have already been set.

Cancer? Eye cancer? What am I going to do? If things get worse, I might clearly lose my eyesight. And what is going to happen next? I won’t be able to see Kyuhyun, I won’t be able to see my family members, and I won’t be able to paint.

I won’t be able to paint. How am I going to know where to dip my paintbrush? How am I going to know where to place it on the canvas? How would I know which colour I’m painting?

What am I going to do if I cannot see the face of Kyuhyun? My precious Kyuhyun? 

“Rae Young? Listen to me. I am going to put you through treatment as soon as possible. You hear me? I want you to get well. You have to get well or else Kyuhyun is going to kill me.” Ji Ra said as she scribbled something in the document.

“It’s cancer. There is no cure for it. What’s the point? I’m going to die anyway. Just by a faster pace.” I sulked.

“How can you say about such things in that way? I am the doctor. You are the patient. You are going to listen to what I am going to put you through. You are going to get better and recover from this totally. It can be done. Rae Young, believe in me and believe in yourself.” Ji Ra said with a smile.

I could see how much she was trying to comfort me. So I smiled back, sadly.

“Where did you go?” Kyuhyun said as he enveloped me in his arms the moment I reached home.

“Rae? Rae?” He called.

“What?” I said, shaking my head, trying to throw the negative thoughts away.

“I asked what you want to eat for dinner. Didn’t you hear me? Lost in your train of thoughts again?” Kyuhyun said as I turned around to face him.

“No. I was just…” I stopped, looking at his face.

This beautiful face. What if I won’t be able to see this beautiful face ever again? What if I don’t get well and lose my sight forever? Won’t I be unable to see this face? My precious husband’s face? My hands unknowingly rose and rested on either side of Kyuhyun’s face.

I caressed his face as I observed every detail, every acne scar, the way his eyebrows were shaped, his chubby cheek, the bridge of his nose and the way his eyes sparkled. I had to memorize his face from now on. If anything is going to happen to me, I should memorize Kyuhyun’s face before it’s too late.

If things get worse, should I leave Kyuhyun?

“Rae, I know I’m very attractive, must you be like this?” Kyuhyun’s voice broke my thoughts.

I laughed and looked away before he could spot my tears. “I-I just missed you today, that’s all.” I said as I quickly hugged him so he couldn’t see my face.

“Awww.” Kyuhyun cooed as he too hugged me tightly in his arms. “I missed you too. Where did you go today?” He said, smelling and kissing my hair.

“T-Today? I went out. S-Shopping!” I said as I turned around and walked up the stairs to the bedroom.

“Shopping? You ain’t carrying any shopping bags, should I be worried about this?” Kyuhyun joked.

“Nothing caught my eye. The collections weren’t interesting.” I lied.

“That is something serious!” Kyuhyun spoke. “Nothing caught your eye? Whoa, are you on your monthly girly thing or what?”

I gasped and took the pillow to fling it at him. “Kyu!” I yelled.

“I was kidding. Kidding, my dear.” He said with a smile, finally taking a look at my face. “Why are your eyes red, Rae?” He said, coming closer.

“N-No, they are n-not!” I said as I walked backwards.

“Let me see them!” He insisted as he gripped my wrist, stopping me from moving and placing another hand on my cheek.

I looked away, refusing to let Kyuhyun see my face.

“Is something bothering you? That’s why you didn’t buy anything when you went out today?” He asked in a soft voice.

I shook my head.

“What is it then? Let me see your eyes.” He said as he lifted my chin.

“Your eyes are red and swollen. Y-You cried? What is the matter?” Worry spread across Kyuhyun’s face as I stared back at him.

I shook my head once again. “N-Nothing happened. Something just went into my eyes, that’s all.”

“Let me check.” Kyuhyun was determined. He held my face protectively in his hands as he blew air into my eyes.

Rubbing my cheek, he kissed me. “You should stop sitting too close to your lap top and the television. Your vision will get affected. Come, let’s go out to the balcony and look at some greenery.” Kyuhyun said, tugging my hand to the balcony.

He was so sweet, being concerned about all this when it’s not the case. How am I going to tell it to him? I was forced to sit down on the recliner as Kyuhyun took his place next to me, he leaned across me and starting rubbing my forehead. “Focus on the greens. Look out to the furthest green tree out there and stare at it.” He commanded.

“Kyu, I’m fine.” I tried telling it to him.

“I’ve been noticing. You sit too close to your laptop and the television. NO wonder your eyes are becoming red. From now on, you are going to sit ten feet away from the television and no lying on the bed with your laptop.”

“But I love lying down on the bed with my laptop.” I whined.

“No, you should love lying down in bed with me, not the laptop.” He smirked. I punched his chest. “You and your mouth.”

“But you love me.” He said, leaning in to peck my lips.

I gave it to him, wrapping my arms around his neck. “I do.” I whispered as Kyuhyun carried me back to the bedroom.

I love you Kyuhyun, I love you so much. To a point where I can’t bring myself to tell you the truth. Please forgive me. I’m just going to be a burden if my condition worsens. Short term pain is better than a long term of agony. 

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Hey readers! *waves*

I'M BACK. I'm sorry for not updating in a while. Please forgive me! To be very honest, I started writing the story with the drama part in mind and I didn't think much about the beginning so I had a hard time trying to path a way for the story to happen. Anyway, here's a chapter and hopefully I can get another chapter out by tomorrow for you guys! 

Please continue to comment! I love you guys! 

Xoxo.