My phone’s screen didn’t even glow once after that afternoon, he didn’t call, he was mad obviously. I had made him mad. I didn’t know how but I had managed to and it seemed like what I had done was serious since about a week had passed without hearing news from him. I also avoided Jonghyun’s calls, I had decided that it was the best to stay away from CNblue as a whole for a while, even if it wasn’t Jonghyun’s fault this time around  but my own.

It was a Saturday and I was coming back home from college, I only had one class that day so I wasn’t late. I opened the door of the building and then went up the stairs in direction to my flat, I was planning  on leaving my bag there and then leave off to a nice restaurant, wasn’t really feeling like cooking, at all. When I arrived at my floor though, I took notice of an envelope under my door.

“Huh…what is this?”

I kneeled in front of my door to pick up the envelope and opened it, my eyes opened wide when I saw who had send it, I sighed as I took out some tickets for Inkigayo’s episode that was going to take place the following day.

There was a note attached inside the envelope, I just kept staring at it and kept looking at the name written at the lower right corner.

“Hi, it’s me. How are you? You haven’t been answering my calls in a week, is there something wrong? I thought since you didn’t answer I would come to you, or make you come to me… so I managed to get some Inkigayo passes. I hope to see you this Sunday. –Jonghyun”

“Well…sorry” I muttered as I made my way inside my flat and placed the envelope on the small table that was in the middle of my living room. I sank at the sofa, I wasn’t hungry anymore. I actually felt a little guilty, I had just suddenly stopped talking to Jonghyun after that fight me and Minhyuk had. I didn’t know if there was any logic behind me not talking to Jonghyun because Minhyuk and I had fought, but things turned out that way.

I took my phone out of my bag and stared at the screen, taking into consideration the possibility of calling Jonghyun and saying thanks for the present and also, saying that I wasn’t going to go to Inkigayo the following day. If I went to the recording of Inkigayo, I would have to face Minhyuk and I wasn’t sure if he was still mad at me or not, most likely he was. And it actually worried me, because I had never seen Minhyuk mad at me and in all honesty, I kind of didn’t know how to deal with a situation like that.

As I was about to make up my mind and finally dial Jonghyun’s number, my phone started glowing, I saw an unknown number on the screen, it wasn’t Jonghyun’s or Minhyuk’s, I had saved both of their numbers and this one didn’t belong to any of them. I, however, hesitantly answered the call.

“Yeoboseyo?”  I slowly said.

“Oh hi! It’s me, Jinae” a cheerful voice said to me.

“Jinae!” I exclaimed feeling very surprised upon hearing her voice “Hi! How would get my number? What a surprise”

There was a short pause before she spoke again, “Minhyuk-oppa gave it to me the other day”

“Oh…” I slowly got to say, “Minhyuk-oppa gave it to you?” It felt weird, hearing her referring to Minhyuk as ‘Minhyuk-oppa’. I, for a fact, knew that she and Jonghyun were closer than she and Minhyuk back in High School, so it kind of felt strange hearing her referring to him like that.

“Yeah, the other day that he gave me the backstage passes to Inkigayo” she stated “He himself gave them to me so I took advantage of that and got your number from him” Ah, true, she was last Sunday over at SBS studio, I guess it was natural for Minhyuk to give Jinae those passes instead of me, I was only his best friend and Jinae possibly was his love interest, maybe after all these years he could get to return her feelings.

“So I see”

“Are you mad at me for calling you like this?” she asked sounding a bit worried. I shook my head and answered.

“No, not at all, it’s alright, it’s good actually, we can keep in touch like this” I tried to sound as normal as I could but there was something bugging me. There was something odd to all of this, but I couldn’t quite figure out what it was.

“Yay! So, do you have any plans for today?” Jinae suddenly asked.

“Plans…?” I slowly replied, so far as I knew there wasn’t anything to do, “No, I’m actually free today”

“Oh really? That’s so cool! Then how about we see each other at the mall from the other day?” she suggested. It didn’t sound bad at all, going out with Jinae after so many years could help me keep my mind off my problems, and that’s what I needed the most at that moment.

“Alright then, sounds like a plan” I cheerfully said bye to Jinae and went to change my clothes before going out. I tried making myself look as pretty as I could, I didn’t want to look bad next to her; she was so pretty and all so I didn’t want people to think that a girl like her could have a friend like me. It’s not like I didn’t take care of my appearance, it’s just that it had always been like this since High School. Whenever we would go out together I would have to take extra care of how I looked since she always insisted that whenever we were together we would have to look the best.

Maybe that’s why I preferred hanging out with Jonghyun and Minhyuk back then since they never took into consideration things that Jinae did. I curled my hair and took out of my closet a denim jacket, a white t-shirt and then, started looking for my slightly ripped jeans; it had been a while that I had taken time to choose my clothes carefully. I slipped into my knee high boots and took a last look at my reflection on the mirror. Ready.

“Guess it’s girl’s time today” I said as I picked my bag and shoved my phone and my keys inside it. I finally went out of my flat as I left the door locked and quickly ran down the stairs eager to meet my friend. After meeting with her again I hadn’t had the chance to actually talk to her and catch up on things, was she still living in Busan or had she moved to Seoul? Did she get to date anyone in these past 5 years? You know, sometimes girls like gossiping? Well, we used to gossip a lot regarding this kind of stuff—“Who do you like? Oh my gosh, is he handsome? Does he like you back?” we used to chat a lot about that. Jinae was actually the one who told me that there was someone in High School who had a crush on me, and that happened just before Jonghyun got to confess to me, however, I guess that’s another story.

I continued walking in direction to the shopping mall and got to find her by the entrance, “Oh Jinae!” I called out to her as I rushed towards her; she smiled at me and waved back.

“Hey there!” she said.

“Sorry, did I take too long?” I asked a little worried.

“No, don’t worry, I actually thought I was going to be late, it’s alright” she explained before turning around on her heels, “Well, shall we go inside?”

“Sure” I nodded and walked inside the mall, we spent some time looking around the clothing stores and talking about random stuff like asking each other if our hobbies were still the same, talking about how pretty the clothes we were looking at were and such. We went to a café, the same one I always used to go to, we ordered some desserts and ice cream before we started talking  for a while there.

“So Jinae, are you living in Seoul now?” I curiously asked to what she nodded in response.

“Yeah, I actually moved after you suddenly left Busan, you know, around a week after our graduation party” she explained.

“Oh, I see then, you didn’t stay longer” she shook her head. I actually moved from Busan as soon as I could. The night of my graduation party was the worst night I had ever spent in that place since that was the night me and Jonghyun broke up. It didn’t take me that long to actually leave the place, after all I, sooner or later, I was going to move to Seoul in order to start my college studies.

“No, all of you left, and I decided that I’d have to move as well, but it took me around a month to come to Seoul” she explained as she took a sip of her iced cappuccino, “Sorry that I didn’t look for you, I should have stayed in contact but you seemed like you wanted to leave everything behind”

“I actually felt like that, you know how bad I felt after…that” I said as I avoided meeting eyes with her.

“Really, Jonghyun-oppa was so careless and lacked common sense to actually tell you to break up on our graduation party” she stated as she played with her hair, “Oppa was somehow cruel”

“Right…”

“You cried so much that night, I mean, who wouldn’t. He said that he hated you, that’s such a cruel thing to say”

I looked up and smiled weakly, “Yeah… you are right”

“Oppa was so careless, I was so worried about you, Minhyuk-oppa was too”

“I know…”

“Do you still hate Jonghyun-oppa by the way?” she suddenly asked as she put her hands over mine “You know, he made your heart ache, and I as your best friend don’t want you to be hurt again”

“Eh…? Jonghyun and I…” I started. Actually, I wasn’t sure of what I wanted to say, me and Jonghyun weren’t formally together again, and I wasn’t sure of how I felt about him. I knew that every now and then he confused me, but I didn’t know if I was still in love with him, but I didn’t hate him anymore “We… we are alright…”

“Alright?” Jinae asked noticeably surprised.

“Yeah…I guess, the other day we talked things through…and he… apologized”

“And let me guess, you are just going to forgive Jonghyun-oppa and go back to his arms” she seriously said to my surprise.

“I…I don’t know”

“You don’t like him? Any girl would kill to have a chance with Lee Jonghyun” she said while browsing something on her phone. I sighed.

“I don’t know” I said once again because that was the honest truth, I had answered the same to Jinae, to Minhyuk and to Jonghyun himself, I didn’t know how I felt right at that moment. I wasn’t sure if liking him was the right thing to do or if it was wrong to go back to him. I didn’t really know, “What about you, Jinae?”

“Me?” she blinked cutely “What about me?”

“You still like Minhyuk-oppa, right? You know, going out with him and all”

“I said it right? I still have a chance, right? Or…is he in love with someone else?” she asked me.

“Eh? I don’t know, he’s always kept those things to himself” Jinae smiled at me

“Are you sure he doesn’t like someone?” she said while looking directly into my eyes, just when I was about to reply, she suddenly looked up and her eyes opened wide in surprise.

“J-Jonghyun-oppa…” she nervously said, I turned around and saw Jonghyun standing behind my chair, his hands resting on my shoulders.

“Jonghyun…” I said under my breath feeling surprised upon seeing  him.

“Hey, what a coincidence to find you both here” he said.

I stood up and bowed, “Excuse me, I think I have to leave now, sorry Jinae I—“ I was saying but Jonghyun interrupted me as he dragged me out of the café.

“Jinae, please take care of her things, I’ll give her back to you in a matter of minutes, alright?” Jonghyun said as we walked out of the place and stood by the door. I tried to free myself from his grasp but it was a little useless since it seemed like he didn’t want to let go.

“Oh my gosh, Jonghyun please stop, be a little gentler!” I exclaimed as I tried to take his hand off of mine.

“Sorry about it, it’s just that I was afraid that you were going to run away” he said as he looked down to the floor.

“I wasn’t running away I was just…. I had…” I stuttered as I tried finding some convincing excuse, “I had to be at some place just when you appeared and…”

Jonghyun shook his head and sighed, “You just wanted to leave as soon as you saw me, what did I do wrong now?”

“Nothing, don’t worry”

“Then what is it? You haven’t answered my calls, neither my texts, are you