So Eun’s POV

Sitting on the seats in the train comfortably, Jun Ho draped over a blanket over my lap to cover my modesty. I thanked him awkwardly and and he smiled, as if he was proud of his own manners.

“Okay, let’s stop filming for a while. You two can rest until we reach our destination,” The Director said to us and turned off the cameras.

I felt a sense of relief when the cameras were turned off. However, that meant we were left alone sitting side by side without anyone scrutinising our movements. That made me nervous.

To keep myself occupied, I took out my notebook and started writing out lyrics and words that came into my mind. I did not want to start a conversation, frightened that I would make a fool out of myself. I bit my lips and started thinking – but my mind was blank. I could not help but fidget to see what he was doing beside me.

Suddenly, he reached out for the boiled eggs he bought earlier for snacks. He gave me one and said, “Have one. You didn’t eat breakfast, am I right?” He prompted, “You never do.”

I looked at him. He remembered but I shook my head and looked at my notebook again. Even though I was not comfortable, I tried to reply him politely, “No thanks. I’m not hungry. And I don’t feel like peeling egg shells right now.”

Jun Ho retrieved his hand and started peeling the egg. I was somehow disappointed he did not insist on me eating. Back in those days, he would start yelling and nagging at me to eat, almost shoving food into my mouth.

And then, I saw his hand in front of my face again. He peeled the egg shell off. He insisted and said, “There. I peeled it for you. All you have to do is to open your mouth and chew.”

“I don’t have hands to hold…”

“I’ll feed you,” He offered suddenly, “Say ‘ah’.”

This time, he was not forceful like he used to. I found it hard to reject him. I was touched and could not help but sigh at his attempt. I opened my mouth for him and he fed me one bite of the egg. He smiled with his eye-smile yet again.

Seeing how this little action of mine actually made him so happy, I did not feel regretful accepting his offer. I ate the egg wholeheartedly, allowing him to feed me one bite after another. Meanwhile, he started talking to me again, “You should eat breakfast. It’s the most important meal of the day.”

“Yes, you may say you have no appetite to eat in the morning but breakfast energises you throughout the day,” He explained patiently and gently, “What if you get sick during your busy schedule? Filming drama isn’t easy, you know.”

“I’ll try.”

“Try?” Jun Ho repeated and wiped his hands after I finished eating the egg, “So Eun-ah, what would I do if you get sick?”

“What?” I swore I heard something but it was too blur for me to hear. As if he mumbled the words through so I would not hear what he said.

“Nothing,” He grinned and placed his hands on his laps.

There was silence between us. I took out my phone to check on my text messages and keep myself occupied again.

“Oh, that’s a very nice picture,” Jun Ho pointed at my phone wallpaper.

I glanced at him briefly and he started to be defensive, “I know you don’t like anyone looking over you using your phone. I just happened to see your wallpaper.”

I laughed when he started to panic like a small boy, “It’s alright. I don’t feel offended. Besides, I have nothing to hide.”

Admiring at my wallpaper, I smiled. My heart was filled with mixed feelings. It was a picture of my mum and I. She was sitting on a chair while I back hugged her securely from behind. Our smiles were natural and lively. We were happy.

“How’s she?” Jun Ho asked cautiously. He used to call her Mother but obviously, he could not do it now. It was weird not hearing him calling my mum Mother. I missed that part of our marriage. My mum liked Jun Ho a lot but things did not end well.

I avoided his eyes and cleared my throat, “She passed away.”

Jun Ho’s POV

“She passed away.”

I stayed quiet. What? So Eun’s mother passed away? Why? When?

The reason was obvious. I knew her mother was ill. She was ill even before we got married back then. I remembered her delicate movements but still reassuring smile she gave when we got married and exchanged our vows.

She was the only one who fully supported our marriage. And I knew the reason why. Her mother did not have much time left, she was afraid not getting the chance to see So Eun get married so she was contented. Fully contented.

However, I disappointed her. We ended the marriage and I remembered seeing her for the last time the day before So Eun and I sighed the divorce papers.

She said this to me, “Jun Ho, thank you very much. Ever since you came into her life, I have never seen So Eun being so happy before. She had a hard childhood. Thanks to you, she was able to open up and be what she is now. Even though you two decided to end things, I will never forget you, Jun Ho.”

My tears started to form when she said the last sentence before I left, “Jun Ho, to me, you’re already my son. Always.”

I felt remorseful at once. She treated me like a son but I never once contacted her back after the divorce. I really concentrated my time on my preparation to debut in 2PM and never cared for the people who cared for me. When I really wanted to care, they were already gone and it was too late.

I snapped back to reality as So Eun started to laugh awkwardly, “Hey, are you okay? I’m fine. It has been a long time. I’m alright.”

I coughed and tried to see whether she was okay. I asked another question, “When did she…”

She pondered for a while, not knowing whether she should answer this question. And then, she replied me, “Well, it was one week after we signed the papers.”

“What?” I did not try to contain my feelings, “Why didn’t you tell me back then?”

She stared at him like I was asking the most absurd question, “In that situation, do you think I would have called you?”

It was true and she looked down. Without thinking, I grabbed hold of her hand and she turned to look at me. Our faces were just inches away.

“I’m sorry, So Eun.”

-

Author's Note:

I have a poster now! You can check it out at the Foreword. :)