“So, Jiyeonahh, who do you plan to ride with? Are you still going to let JB take you home? Or might as well consider riding with me?”

 

I take back what I just said earlier about being happy that Jinwoon hyung’s here. Why did he have to ask that? He’s making it more awkward for us now.

 

And so, after what felt like a full minute of silence, Jiyeon finally spoke,

 

“Let’s just play rock, paper and scissors!”

 

“That’s a good idea,” I immediately followed up, almost immediately actually. I think I couldn’t bear her choosing Jinwoon-hyung over me with her own will; I’d rather have it play by chance just like what she just suggested.

 

“Let’s leave it to destiny then!” Jinwoon-hyung tried to joke but the atmosphere had become heavier.

 

“Kayi-bayi-book!”

 

We played rock paper and scissors. We had it played ten times but the results were all the same- draw. I guess even fate couldn’t decide yet.

 

“Let’s try it one more time,” Jiyeon said enthusiastically and so we agreed to try it once again.

 

“Kayi-bayi-book!”

 

January 20,2012

 

The first part of the shooting was when Jiyeon fell down from a rope bridge and Jinwoon hyung was going to rescue her.

I didn’t watch. I swear I couldn’t bear it. I’ve rehearsed my lines instead.

 

Oh and if you’re curious as to whom Jiyeon ride with yesterday, it was Jinwoon-hyung whom “destiny” picked. Err, that’s why I’ve got no reason to watch them shoot their scene together and even witness how excited they are in working together! And if you’re also wondering what happened to me yesterday, well, I just trailed after their tail so I won’t get lost again. Poor me, I know. But what can I do? I don’t have a chance against Jinwoon-hyung’s so-called “destiny,” so yeah. Whatever. Forget about it!

 

Sora noona came to me as I was scanning the script,  “Need any help?”

 

I don’t know how to approach Sora noona right now. I’m quite not in the mood to socialize or something. I wanted to be alone.

 

“No, I’m fine noona,”

 

But she seemed rather persistent on wanting to get along with me so, “ Want to rehearse with me?”

 

Uh-oh. Eottoke? In as much as I don’t want to be rude or be branded as the bratty-snobbish rookie by my co-actors but I really need this time to be alone. I need some peace of mind since I’m having emotional crisis and I don’t know how to handle it! I might vent it on the wrong person or something so it’s for the best to be alone,

 

“Nahh. I can manage noona but thanks for the offer,” I did it. She was giving me a disheartened expression and from the looks of it, I’m afraid I just became a bratty-snobbish rookie actor in her eyes. All I could do is bit back a sigh and turn away though.

 

As I turned away, there came JR, “Hyung! Why weren’t you answering my calls?”

 

“I was busy,” I lied.

 

“You have lots of things to tell me about,” he nudged me and gave me his naughty smile.

 

“If you don’t mind, will you excuse me because I had to rehearse?”

 

He pouted, “Yah! You workaholic old man! A little talk won’t hurt, you know! So,did something happen between you and Jiyeon?”

 

I couldn’t help but blush, my heart flutters everytime I remember that little moment we shared back in the bushes.

 

But, “In as much as  I wanted to have a talk with you, I can’t”

 

“Wae? Is it R-rated?” he giggled excitedly.

 

“NO! Stop thinking like that! Pabo.. It’s because I already turned down Sora noona’s invitation to rehearse with her earlier so it would be unfair if I’ll talk to you now,”

 

And besides, I won’t have the guts to spread precious things that Jiyeon and I shared. It’s only between the two of us.

 

“What did you just do?” his eyes grew wide.

 

“You heard me. I have to go,”

 

“No way. You really did that? How can you act rudely with our elders here? There must be something wrong, did you have a fight with Jiyeon?”

 

I continued walking away from him,

 

“I’ll give you space hyung, you must be having a hard time but you have to tell me all later, okay?” he added before finally stopping from following me behind.

 

I could breathe now. Whew! How can he easily read me like that? He’s really my friend.

 

If you’re wondering about my emotional crisis, well, it’s a bit obvious actually. Yeah. You got me. It’s all because of what happened yesterday. First, about my unexpected confession; I didn’t even do it properly. I didn’t want a confession just like that. I mean, I could’ve done it better! If only I knew she wasn’t sleeping and all and it wasn’t meant to be a confession in the first place! Gaaahh.. Second, we kissed because of my recklessness. And it looked like she didn’t like it at all because she didn’t even talk to me after that, it’s all Jinwoon-hyung she was talking with. And that brings us to third one, Jinwoon-hyung seemed to pay special attention to Jiyeon too. Ugh.

 

Oh well, as I sat, another person came up to me, like seriously, when will I be able to have some time alone?

 

“JB ssi, do you mind if I sit here?” Ailee noona asked of me. I guess I won’t be having my peace of mind today.

 

“Nope,” I shortly replied.

 

I just browsed through my script silently and rehearsed my lines along with it. Thank goodness, for this whole time, Ailee noona didn’t nag me or anything. She just sat there silently.

 

 

Soon enough, everybody took a break for lunch.

 

Just as I was packing up my things, heading for lunch, Hyorin noona appeared out of nowhere. How come people kept popping up now?

 

“Are you going to have lunch?” she asked.

 

“No. Dinner,” I mumbled. That was really sarcastic of me but I’m totally tired of having excuses.

 

“Neh?”

 

“Nothing.”

 

“Do you have company?”

 

Do I look like I have one? I thought to myself. This is how I become grumpy when I’m just full of disappointment and frustration.

 

“What’s wrong with you today? You don’t sound well,” Hyorin noona noticed.

 

“You’re just imagining things noona,”

 

Then she grabbed my arm, “Yah, where’d you get these bruises? I knew it! Something happened! Let me tend your wounds, come.”

 

Well, I probably got those bruises yesterday when Jiyeon and I rolled over and over to the bushes when I was shielding her from getting scratched but there’s no way I’d tell Hyorin noona that, “Don’t mind me. I’ll be okay,”

 

There after, Jinwoon-hyung joined our convo, “Why don’t we all have lunch together?”

 

“Where’s Jiyeon?” I couldn’t help but ask.

 

“She had gone to her other schedules I think.”

 

“That’s a pity,” Hyorin noona commented and added, “Oh well, let’s just have our lunch then, the three of us?”

 

“I’ll join!” Ailee noona suddenly came out of nowhere.

 

“Me too,” Seojoon-hyung suddenly appeared too.

 

“What’s happening here? Why isn’t anyone inviting me too?” Kahi noona in.

 

“Yay! Count me in! “ Sora noona popped up too.

 

“I’ll pass,” I told them. Everybody looked at me accusingly or something close to that.

 

“No way!” Hyorin noona profusely disagreed.

 

“Yah! Why couldn’t you join us?” Sora noona followed up the attack.

 

I don’t have the mood. But how can I tell them that? Besides, there’s no Jiyeon to lift up my mood.

 

“I’m sorry,”

 

With that, I walked out on them and didn’t give them the chance to catch up with me and complain more.

 

I went on the swing, where Jiyeon and I would be shooting later. I took a sit and finally able to enjoy my peace of mind. It felt so good.

 

But then, my time alone was cut-short. A familiar voice called for my name which made my heart beat wild,

 

“JB ssi, your wound..”