Shim Changmin

Did I tell you anything about Cho KyuHyun before? Well, I think I did, right?

Actually, he succeeded in tracking down Jaejoong's history. He found out - not everything but almost all- his history that made me a bit shocked. But at the same time I knew this was a chance for me. I could finally grasp the reality of his situation; of why he couldn't open his heart to anyone else around him. He was battling with his conscience. He was trying to survive the pain by locking the doors to his heart. He had been successful by now because it seemed like he didn't waver when both of us chase him like there's no tomorrow.

KyuHyun told me that when Jaejoong was still in Jeju, he was actually quite well known because he was Kim Hyuk Tae's son. He was the top student in his class and was the batch president during his senior year. He was lovable and his beauty made the girls jealous and the boys wanted him. Fortunately his adorable attitude won over people's heart. He however had never been close to anyone except with Park Yoochun, a fellow who was sharing the same status as him. What did it mean? Simple, Park Yoochun was a successor to a seafood company. His family was as rich as Kim Hyuk Tae's, so both of them had been associated since they were very young.

He's not the main topic here and we would get there, soon.

Kim Jaejoong was a cold person, like KyuHyun stated. When he was still at school, he didn't let anyone who was not significant to his upper class status to be near him. It was like he was the kingka of the school by how the school admins treated him. He had always got the good grades and the best position plus the doting from the teachers. He had never had a hard time. KyuHyun found out then that the special treatment was actually affecting Jaejoong's entire life there. The teachers expected too much from Jaejoong and his father wasn't helping too. He had urged the teachers to always pay attention to his son. I thought maybe that's why when Jaejoong arrived here he lived a life anonymously. He had given up the famous life back at Jeju.

KyuHyun then found out that due to his coldness towards unfamiliar person he had never dated anyone even though he had everything a girl wants. But it was rumoured that Jaejoong once was very close with someone, a year older than him. He was as close as Park Yoochun with him but everyone in school knew there was something really odd between their relationships. The thing was Park Yoochun had the same status as Kim Jaejoong but not this person.

His name was Kim Hyun Joong. He was a son of a teacher. KyuHyun didn't get much information about him because suddenly he disappeared just like that. Nobody wanted to talk about him. Nobody dared to even speak his name back at his old school. KyuHyun tried to search any records that would lead to Kim Hyun Joong but he found nothing. KyuHyun accidentally heard about Kim Hyun Joong when he finished inquiring the school librarian about Jaejoong. He forgot something and returned back to the library and overheard about Kim Hyun Joong. He even threatened them but they didn't oblige.

No one could help him to reveal who Kim Hyun Joong was. And I actually only bluffed when I said I knew about him. I only knew his name and his brief story that wasn't even significant enough.

But that name had an effect on Jaejoong. The person in front of me now was really pale. He was holding on to Yoochun for support. His eyes that were still stuck on me suddenly glimmered with tears. My heart that I had kept shut since three months ago started to open again. He stared at me, probably waiting. When I kept quiet, he turned around. His hand automatically took Yoochun's hand and he inhaled a deep breath. I grabbed his wrist. He pulled it back but I didn't let go. His expression was the saddest of all. Yoochun glared at me and he put an arm around Jaejoong's waist protectively and slapped my hand. My grasp on him became loose.

"Let's go." I heard Park Yoochun whispered to Jaejoong and the kid nodded briefly while his reddened face looked really troubled.

"I won't stop!" I yelled when both of them walked away but only Park Yoochun turned his head around.

Somehow my instinct told me that Jaejoong was crying.

***

The next day, I called KyuHyun to my office and asked him more about Jaejoong. Actually I had read about him a lot after I knew he was a chaebol. KyuHyun gathered all the information for me. KyuHyun was suspicious about him too because of me. I didn't blame him though. It could actually motivate him to find out more about him and more effectively.

"I met him yesterday," I said just to inform KyuHyun. He looked like he just got out of a tornado because his hair was all dishevelled. "Where did you come from?"

"The latest aero convention." KyuHyun said. I nodded. KyuHyun was actually the biggest geek I ever encounter. He spent his night playing online game with his online friends who I think had never met each other in real life. His real passion was space and aero engineering but something happened made him couldn't pursue it. "What do you want now?"

"Another confirmation that Jaejoong was not owned by anyone."

"Owned?" KyuHyun hooked his brows together. I rubbed both my palms.

"I mean whether he's single or not."

"I figured." he replied nonchalantly.

"I really wanted to have him." there I said. KyuHyun watched me for a while and smiled lightly.

"Why?"

"Do I have to need a reason?"

"Maybe. It's weird. Remember when you decided to not let anyone in your life again?" I rolled my eyes. What's up with KyuHyun? Did he not happy that finally I wanted to break the promise? I looked at him in the eyes and averted it elsewhere when he glared back at me.

"I changed my mind. So...?" he didn't say anything. Instead, he played with the Newton's cradle on my table. I sighed and he looked at me again. "I need somebody in my life,"

"Do you want to marry him?"

"No!" I retorted. KyuHyun shrugged it off.

"Well, you seemed like it, though." he laughed devilishly.

"Like what?"

"Marrying him. Seriously, Changmin? What happened to the evil you? We wanted to conquer the world together. You and I. How could you let me down because of, wait for it, a boy?" he laughed again. I couldn't stand it so I grasped my rubber ball on my table and threw it to KyuHyun. It hit him square in the face. I laughed. Guess, I gotten my revenge. "Dude!" he threw it back at me but I dodged it so the ball just flew past me and hit the wall and bounced back. I let it rolled on the ground without bothering to pick it up again.

"I just wanted something that would not bore me, okay?"

"By being gay?"

"No." I rolled my eyes. KyuHyun rubbed his eyes and stared at me. "By chasing him. The bet wasn't over yet."

"Bet? What bet?" I didn't answer him. It would take only time to let Jaejoong realise that he could never run away from me.

***

Yunho didn't come to the office today. I heard that he was sick. I thought maybe it was because he had just come back from China for a business trip. Grandma urged me to go visit him and because I love her so much I paid him a visit one day after work.

Yunho's house was a four storey bungalow with a big nice garden. Yunho still lived with his parents and Grandma. Yunho's parents were retired and they had stopped managing the company, just like Grandma. My house which I stayed with my mom now was quite far from his house. My mother and father divorced quite a long time ago, which was a period in my life that I hated to discuss with anyone. Not even KyuHyun could make me talk about it. It was a cold-hearted decision to force the memory out of my mind but what could I do than to protect my own heart other than this. I learned to protect myself because no one I knew could.

When I entered the house I was greeted by the butler who was actually someone who I was familiar with because he had been in the family since I was so young to remember. He always had that kind smile on his face even when I did something wrong in the house. I knew he wasn't keen of me but what could he do? He was just a butler. He couldn't report me.

I grinned at him and told him that I was just going to go to Yunho's room without any further permission. I skipped the stairs three steps at a time and arrived at Yunho's room which was the furthest in the first floor.

Yunho was staring out the window when I pushed the door open. He turned and tried to smile but then changed his mind when he saw me. I grinned at him; the moment where Yunho was sick was the moment that I could do almost anything to him. Last time he was sick, I pulled a prank on his girlfriend and the next day he broke up with her.

"What do you want?" his tone was harsh.

"Can I just visit you in peace?" I slumped myself on the couch facing the bed he was in. He looked pale and his voice was hoarse. His hair was messy and he looked thinner.

"Oh thank you for the thought." he said sarcastically.

"Grandma forced me to." I said grumpily. I pretended to check on my nails. "You know...I met him the other day," Yunho was silent. "I mean..."

"I understand who you mean," he abruptly cut me off. He was obviously distracted but he tried his best to put on his poker face. I watched him and only when an awkward atmosphere had engulfed us, I started to speak again.

"He was with someone else. He said he was his boyfriend," I saw him gripped the bed sheet but his face remained stoic. "He was quite a face. Both of them suited each other," I knew I was just throwing more gasoline to the fire but I couldn't help to see how much I could push before he blows up. "The kid looked like he was enjoying himself when he was with him,"

"Why are you telling me this?" finally, a reaction! I tried so hard to hide my smirk.

"Oh, thought you want to know,"

"Get out of my room," he snickered, obviously getting impatient of me just being there. I didn't move. "You're done here." he stood up and he wobbled his way to me. The Kool-fever that was pestered on his forehead made his face looked even sicker. There was a hint of pity emerged deep down in my heart. After all, he was still my cousin. He pushed me but I was still strong and he had grown weaker. He put a hand on his temple, his brows furrowed.

"I haven't finished," I pouted. He shook his head.

"I don't want to know about him."

"Give up already?" I heard his jaw clenched. He looked teary but didn't say anything. I flashed a smile. A cheeky one. I didn't want to cheer him up but I didn't want him to act like a loser. "Fine. Whatever."

I rose from my seat and headed to the door. I opened it and turned to see Yunho slumped back on the bed. His face was furious, like actually he didn't want me here. Oh, like I want to be here!

" off!" he groaned.

"Sure thing," I grunted and exited and made sure I slammed the door.

***

When I got back to my own house, it was creepily silent. It was up to the point of there's a ringing in my ear. My heart immediately felt like running really, really fast when I entered. The main study's light was opened so I peeked inside thinking I should check on my mom. I saw Umma was talking with someone inside there, with his back against the door. I didn't knock but Umma already noticed me when I want to stealthily run away without greeting her guest. She stood up, her face grew worried when she approached me. The man who was with her turned back and I froze.

It was Appa. Instantly, my whole body became rigid and stiff because of every unresolved issue that this couple brought up and burdened me. Mom put a hand on my forearm as I glared at Appa. I turned to her and bowed my head, showing what's left of my honour towards Appa. But I didn't wait any longer because I couldn't stand it. When Appa stood up from his seat I swung my legs and walked away.

A/N another update for you, enjoy!