It should be right around the corner. I looked at my phone again for the tenth time. Hyung, couldn't you give better directions?

The rain became a slight drizzle but I was drenched from head to toe. Min Jung ah...stay strong. I can't bear seeing like that. All weak and fake smiles. If only...if only she chose me. All this wouldn't have happened. I'd never make her shed a single tear and instead I'll make her smile and laugh all day. Really smile. But, she chose him over me. I couldn't accept it at first. Because I thought it was unfair. But then I told myself, I would rather keep her as a friend. Because then, the chances of me losing her is lesser. 

 

 

 

 

 

So I tried real hard. Really hard. To see her only as a friend. A best friend. But there are times I couldn't help myself. Times when I wished I could hug her, kiss her and keep her to myself. Of course it's hard to see her with Sunggyu. It just makes it worse. I'd feel like snatching her away from him. But I know that wouldn't work. That would only make her hate me, and I'd lose her forever. That's why whenever Sunggyu's there with her, I just had to leave. Because I'm scared that my selfish feelings might return. So I'd rather stand by her as a friend, who loves her and would sacrifice anything just for her. Even confronting with Sunggyu to come back to her. 

 

 

 

 

 

"This must be it." I said to myself after looking at the address again. It was a small house right at the end of an alley. Junhyung told me Sunggyu used to live here ever since he was a kid. Sure enough, the lights inside was on. I gulped and took a step forward towards the front door. You can do it, even if you don't want to, do it for Min Jung...I told myself. I took a breath and pressed the doorbell. From the gap underneath the door, I saw shadows moving. And a few seconds later, the door opened and a tired looking Sunggyu was standing right in front of me. 

 

 

 

 

 

"Hyung." I said, trying to sound tough. Relax, Taemin ah, for Min Jung. My hands were curled into fists. Just the sight of him makes me angry. 

"T-taemin ah, what are you doing here? How did you-" Before he could finish, I pushed him aside and went in the house. 

 

 

 

 

 

There was something strange about the house. The atmosphere. It's similar to...Min Jung's house. It feels empty. Sunggyu cleared his throat and closed the door. He looked at me and opened his mouth to say something but stopped. Instead, he ushered me towards the living room. "Wait here." He said and disappeared somewhere. I nodded. 

 

 

 

 

 

There was a small tv and a shelf in the living room. I approached the shelf. There were a few picture frames with old pictures. In one, there was an old man and a woman hugging each other. And in another frame, there were two small boys. One of them, looked like Sunggyu. It must be him when he was younger. And then there was a bigger picture frame with all of them together. It seems like a happy family. But something about this house doesn't feel happy.

 

 

 

 

 

Sunggyu cleared his throat again and I turned. "Is this your family?" I pointed to the bigger picture. He looked at the picture, and gave a small nod. "Here, have some." He brought out two glasses of drinks and set in on the small coffee table in between us. I nodded and slowly sat down on the seat next to it. Sunggyu went up to the shelves and took the big frame. He sat down next to me.

 

 

 

 

 

"These are my parents," he showed to the old couple in the picture. They were standing behind the two small boys with their hands on their shoulders. "And, this is my dongsaeng, Sungjong." He pointed to the boy who seemed a bit fairer than him and a looked a bit feminine. I didn't know he had a brother. But, why is he telling me all this?

 

 

 

 

 

"He died in an accident a few years ago." Those words seemed to bounce on the walls, making an echo in the empty house. I looked at him, his eyes getting red. 

That's why I've never seen him before. "I-i'm sorry, hyung." He shook his head and smiled. "W-what happened?" I dared myself to ask, even though the reason I came here was about Min Jung. Sunggyu slowly put the frame on the coffee table and rested his arms on his thighs. 

 

 

 

"He was walking home from school. He was listening to music and was crossing the road. I was somewhere nearby with my friends when I saw him. And then I saw the car. It was coming towards him. I tried calling out to him but he couldn't hear. And then..." His voice started to tremble. He took a few deeps breaths and continued. "And then the next thing I knew, he was lying in the middle of the road, and there was blood on my shirt."

 

 

 

"Did he make it?" I know it was a stupid question to ask but, he answered anyway. "He was alive when we took him to the hospital. He was in a comatose state for eight months. But then one day, the beeping sound on the machine died, and he, left. He should be about your age by now." I just nodded. "Then what about your parents?" This time, it took a long while before he answered.  

 

 

 

"They couldn't afford to pay the hospital bills. Omma was a housewife and appa was just selling deokbeokki on the street. So I stopped school just so that I can help them find money. But then one day, when I came home from work, the house was empty. Usually, omma would be.." His voice trembled harder this time. I awkwardly patted his back.

 

 

 

He looked at me and nodded to say thanks and cleared his throat to continue. "Omma would usually in the kitchen, making dinner and appa would be on the couch, reading. But they weren't there. I thought they went somewhere like the bank or something. So I waited." And then he covered his face with both his hands and his body started the shake. "But..they didn't come back?" I quietly said and he nodded. 

 

 

 

I never knew he had such a painful past. But somehow, it seemed similar to Min Jung's. Her parents left her too when they were in debt. But, he's different. He was all alone. His brother died but Min Jung still has her sister. I suddenly felt sorry towards him. I thought he was always someone who had a simple life, always happy and thinking about others. Who would have thought behind that smile was someone who was shattered and alone. But again I wondered, why is he telling me all this...I opened my mouth to ask but he seemed to know what I was thinking. 

 

 

 

 

 

"I thought I wasn't doing a good job in supporting the family. The reason why my parents left me. And I've been so insecure about everything ever since. Always trying to keep up with others so I wouldn't be a burden. That's why when, whenever I saw you with Min Jung, I felt like, I wasn't good enough for her too and that she'd leave me, just like how my parents did. So I left first. So it'd be less painful." He said as he looked up, his face stained with tears. 

 

 

 

So, the reason he left her was because of, me? I made him jealous? So, the root to Min Jung's tears is....me? I sighed and leaned back on the couch. Maybe...maybe it's me who should have ran away. If I ran away, maybe all this wouldn't have happened. And Min Jung would still be smiling right now. I closed my eyes, already feeling tears forming. Sunggyu patted my shoulder. "It's not your fault. It's mine. I'm such a coward."

 

 

 

"Hyung, let's just say it's both our fault. So none of us would feel guilty." I said as I turned to him. He looked at me, wanting to protest but in the end just nodded. "Okay, we need to fix things back. Hyung, go back to Min Jung. Say you're sorry." I stood up. But he was still rooted on the couch. "How can I? After what I've done to her?" And he covered his face with his hands again. 

 

 

 

"Hyung! Min Jung fainted! She's been looking for you ever since you went missing, without any rest! She's strong for doing all that Hyung, but not strong enough. She collapsed this morning after looking for you in the rain! Are you just gonna sit here and cry? Hyung, you are her everything!  Trust me, I can make her happy, but not as much as how you can." I pause, looking at Sunggyu. He lifted his head from his hands and looked at me with tears in his eyes.

 

 

"Hyung, it's now or never. If you don't go back to her, I"ll.....I'll take her away fro you forever." I said. 

 

 

At that moment Sunggyu stood up. "Are you...are you really going to take her away if I don't?" "Hyung, I love her with all my heart. And it hurts me to see her like this. But right now, the person who can make her smile again, become Min Jung again, is you." Sunggyu smiled and hugged me. "Thank you Taemin ah. I...I'm sorry for-" "There's no time for apologies, just go Hyung." I said as I pushed him out the door. I didn't want him to see me crying. I closed the door and I could her him running. I sighed and let my tears fall.

 

 

 

I went over to the picture frame of Sunggyu and his brother. Sungjong ah...your brother is a big pabo do you know that? But, he's a pabo that Min Jung loves very much. I did the right thing to let go right? I said as I looked at the small boy who was smiling widely in the picture. I placed the frame back on the shelf and went out of the house. Across the street I could already see Sunggyu boarding the bus back to Seoul. I put my hands in my front pocket and started walking. The clouds in the sky are starting to disappear and slowly, I could feel the warmth of the sun.

 

 

Min Jung better give me a proper thank you when I get back.