I Know I Can't Have You

Love Is...

Kiseop plopped on his bed, face down and exhausted from the performance. Tomorrow was their last full day in Japan, and then they'd go back to Korea. Kiseop heard the door open and shut again, meaning Jaeseop was there, and soon Kiseop heard the shower running. Kiseop almost didn't care as his eyelids began drooping and he found it harder and harder to move, or gather the motivation to stay awake to take a shower after Jaeseop.

He just wanted sleep. Letting out a yawn, Kiseop relaxed fully on his bed, stuffing his hands under the pillow he had buried his face in and almost instantly fell asleep.

Jaeseop exited the shower, and, upon seeing Kiseop already asleep on his bed, smiled, knowing that at some point during the night Kiseop would move over to his bed.

It was one of Kiseop's little habits that Jaeseop found cute. No matter what, Kiseop would childishly crawl into bed with him and he had no doubt it wasn't just because it was him. He heard from Soohyun that he would always do it when he shared a room with someone.

Jaeseop dressed and went to curl up under the covers, suddenly noticing Kiseop didn't have any over himself. Hauling himself out of bed once more, Jaeseop pulled the unmade covers around Kiseop, smiling slightly to himself.

There wasn't even time for Jaeseop's buzzing mind to calm down from the concert high before Kiseop stood sleepily and shuffled over to Jaeseop's bed. Jaeseop had his back to the sleepwalking ulzzang, so he didn't notice until the bed shifted and Kiseop's face was smashed in between his shoulder blades, the rest of his body curled against Jaeseop's. Jaeseoop just smiled and turned to wrap his arms around Kiseop.

Kiseop smelled like sweat, the musky remnants of the concert where all of them by the end had been soaked. But, Jaeseop didn't mind as it wasn't overwhelming or foul, it was still overshadowed by the cologne Kiseop usually wore, the one Jaeseop liked.

Jaeseop shrugged and let himself fall asleep as Kiseop's electric embrace had calmed his mind down so he thought of nothing pertaining to that day's events, only of the adorable man held tightly in his arms.

It was only like this when he could let out his conflicting emotions and feel what he truly felt for the boy. He wasn't supposed to like his hyung, and definitely not as much as he did. Jaeseop sighed, almost fully asleep as he buried his face into Kiseop's neck.

.....

When the two boys woke up, it was only because the bright sunlight on Jaeseop's bed was blinding. Kiseop yawned, rubbing his eyes like a little kid and looked at Jaeseop. "Good morning, Seoppie cat." Kiseop smiled, almost crippling Jaeseop with his cuteness and he was sure if he had been standing, he would have fallen over.

"Good morning, Kishie." Jaeseop greeted with a smile and stretched his arms above his head, feeling his joints pop in several different places.

"Sorry I keep crawling into your bed, I bet you'll be glad to have your own bed back when we get home." Kiseop apologized, getting out of the bed leaving Jaeseop's side strangely cold. He wanted to tell the thin dancer that it wasn't a problem, and he would probably miss the company, but kept quiet for the sake of their friendship.

Jaeseop almost winced at the word even in his mind. He didn't like being just Kiseop's friend, but he couldn't ask for more. It would ruin what they had.

Jaeseop ran a hand over his face as Kiseop gathered some fresh clothes and entered the bathroom for a shower. With a sigh, Jaeseop got up and walked into the kitchen, noticing Soohyun and Hoon sitting together at the table eating their kimchi and Jaeseop inspected to see if they had made enough food for everyone, pleased, but not surprised to find they had.

Hoon studied Jaeseop as he sat down and Soohyun almost glared into his bowl. Hoon seemed worry free while Jaeseop could tell something was bothering Soohyun, "How'd you sleep?" Hoon asked happily. As if he had any other tone, Jaeseop thought.

"Very well, I guess."

"Oh? You left your door open, you know. And I got the most adorable picture of you and Kiseop." Hoon took out his phone and pressed a few buttons before turning the screen towards Jaeseop.

Jaeseop almost smiled at the picture himself, seeing him and Kiseop cuddled together with content smiles on their faces made his heart feel light and bubbly.

"Send that to me." Jaeseop said, "please." he added when Soohyun glared at him. There were phases where Soohyun was concerned about their manners, and usually all of them just ignored him, but with the daggers Soohyun was throwing off Jaeseop almost feared for his life.

Hoon took his phone back and tapped more buttons, and minutes later, Jaeseop heard his phone chime in their room. Deciding he would get it later, Jaeseop studied Soohyun once more, noticing he seemed more upset than yesterday. This still couldn't be about their tardiness yesterday, right? Soohyun didn't hang onto grudges like that.

Besides, it wasn't like they had missed anything tragically important. In fact, due to the speediness of the stylists, they were still able to get onstage on time. So, that said, what on earth was bothering Soohyun? Jaeseop thought he could die of old age still pondering this question if he didn't just ask his leader himself.

"Soohyun, what-"

"Hello, Kiseop!" Hoon greeted, cutting Jaeseop off from asking as the ulzzang shuffled, hair wet with his white towel slung around his bare shoulders.  The greeting was unnecessarily loud, and Hoon gave Jaeseop a pointed look as if to say, 'don't go there' before he continued.

Kiseop greeted Hoon back, and waved the rapper's phone at him, "You got a text. I heard it ring." Kiseop handed him the device.

"Thanks, it was only Hoon giving me this picture he took last night. Here, look." Jaeseop opened the message and turn the phone towards Kiseop. One glance on the screen and his silly hyung blushed a light shade of pink before sitting next to him with his breakfast.

"That's really cute." Kiseop agreed, very interested in his breakfast all of a sudden. Jaeseop chuckled before He noticed him shiver slightly.

"Are you cold?" The concerned dongsaeng asked, scooting closer to Kiseop and wrapping the towel he had over his head, rubbing it over his still soaked locks. "You'll get sick this way, hyung."

Kiseop shrugged, "I do it all the time." Kiseop shrugged, bringing Jaeseop's attention to a large drop of water hanging from his hair by his ears, seeing it drop and land on his collarbone. Jaeseop's mouth went dry as he watched it make a path over his smooth chest, headed towards those chocolate abs of his-

"Jaeseop?" Hoon asked, snapping him from his concentrated study of the water's movement and was relieved to find that Kiseop hadn't noticed his staring and was instead eating his breakfast calmly. Jaeseop cleared his throat quietly.

"Yes, Hoon?" He answered.

"Manager hyung wanted us to tell you that he'll he coming today to look over some of the songs and things you have written."

"Ah, okay..." Jaeseop nodded, now slightly nervous. He had wrote songs before, and helped with some, but it was a first that his songs were going to be specifically looked at and chosen.

Kiseop having noticed Jaeseop's nervousness, punched his fist slightly in the air, "they'll be great. In fact, they will probably fight over which ones to pick." Kiseop encouraged with a big smile.

Jaeseop had to admit, it calmed him down to hear Kiseop rooting for him.

"But not until later, we have a few performances today." Soohyun stood up swiftly and went to put his food away, Hoon following after with a worried look on his face.

 

Are these chapters a good length for you guys? I feel like they're a tad bit short....

ALSO! I will be putting a rated chapter in here...but since the story is NOT rated and there are probably some readers who would prefer not to read that, I will be just putting the whole 'situation' in one chapter so that the readers who don't want to read that can just skip it and not miss anything important or cute...I guess....? Is that a good idea?

Well, even if you thought it wasn't, I'm still doing it...sooooooo~!

XP

 

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ForbiddenLove
Soooo...there's a new chapter....

Comments

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kpopchicken
#1
Chapter 27: OKAY THIS STORY WAS AMAZING. LOVED IT.

I'M SAD YOU KEPT DEGRADING YOUR OWN WRITING AT THE END OF EVERY CHAPTER
CAUSE IT WAS GREAT
AND I'M A WRITER TOO AND I GET THE PRESSURE
BUT STILL HAVE CONFIDENCE <3
KillThemLoud #2
Chapter 27: I know you won't see this message, but this was a really great story!!!
pinkmushroom
#3
Chapter 27: Just finished reading this. Honestly, I was screaming most of the time. Out of frustration and joy. xD You did a really good job~
tonyphann #4
Chapter 27: Just read finished reading this! It was cute =D. Awesome job!
TheAlmightyStarlight #5
Chapter 7: Ehehehe sneaky Hoon is sneaky. XD
WeSetOff
#6
Chapter 27: I loved this story. From start to finish it was amazing.
kawaiiboo #7
Chapter 27: Awwrr this was AMAZING!! I love it! Thanks for made this adorable fanfic >3< Please keep writting... <3
lily_ukiss #8
Chapter 27: heeeeey why are you leaving? your stories are great!!!! I was even waiting for blood red illusion's update O_O
I love this chapter like I loved the other chapters! I just wanted to tell you you're not a failure at all....don't give up, think again please,then decide!!! you are one of my favorite authors, well I' not forcing you to stay it's your choice!
love ya<3
(I hope you read this)