The Words I Cannot Tell You

Love Is...

Kiseop waved excited as Jaeseop looked towards him in the recording booth, having just arrived with Kevin and Hoon. Since, once again, he didn't have many lines to work on, Jaeseop had suggested that they go out to lunch after he was done. Kiseop would have been foolish to refuse and asked Kevin if he could record first for the day.

Kiseop sat to wait patiently as Jaeseop finished up his last section and exited the booth. "Good job, Jaeseop-ah~!" Kiseop congratulated and gave him a small hug. Jaeseop chuckled at Kiseop's eagerness but returned the hug tightly with a thanks in Kiseop's ear which ran down his spine and gave him a slight shiver.

With a small blush, Kiseop moved from Jaeseop's arms and went to record, eye flickering over to Jaeseop every so often as he chatted with Kevin. Like this, Kiseop didn't worry about much going on with the members, or his life. When he was singing or dancing, all his worries seemed to float away. And then he would look at Jaeseop, and raw emotion would fill his heart to almost bursting.

He couldn't contain his smile, and it was so big it hurt his cheeks. There was nothing Kiseop could do, for he had resigned to the fact that he loved Jaeseop a while ago, but he was still working on accepting the fact that Jaeseop would probably never love him back. They were just great friends.

At the thought, his voice cracked terribly, and he had to do the line over in the song, hoping it would be his last take.

After another thirty minutes, Kiseop was done with all his takes and finally stepped from the booth, stretching. "Dooone~!" he said happily, smiling at Jaeseop. He normally was straight faced and serious, but that was before he met Jaeseop. After that, he began to open up more and relax, wanting in some strange way to impress Jaeseop. It must have worked, for the most part anyway, since they seemed to hang out so much.

Kiseop and Jaeseop waved goodbye to Kevin as they left, and for a second, Kiseop saw a flash of sadness in his eyes.

"J-Jaeseop-ah...I think Eli and Kevin broke up..." Kiseop began, surprising Jaeseop.

"They did."

Kiseop blanched, looking up with big eyes at his dongsaeng, "W-Why?"

Jaeseop shrugged, "I just know they did. It's kind of obvious. But...I don't think we should mention it to either of them..."

"Mmm..." Kiseop mumbled, looking down at the ground as they got into the car arranged to drive them to Jaeseop's house, they didn't want fans swarming them while they tried to eat, so Jaeseop agreed to make them both lunch, even if it would turn out to be something simple like steamed vegetables and rice.

It was silent as they sat at different sides of the car to look at the streets and people passing by. It really was a beautiful day out, not that it was uncommon for them to see it so bright out, but after a few months in Japan, both of them had begun to miss the comfort of their own country severely.

Jaeseop sighed, causing Kiseop's eyes to flicker over in concern. "Are you okay?" he asked, raising and eyebrow.

"Yeah, I just...I'm a little stressed out, not going to lie."

"Why?" Kiseop pestered, growing concerned for his rapper. Kiseop had to correct himself, Jaeseop wasn't HIS...and would never be so.

"Earlier I had the meeting with the producers that was canceled due to their scheduling conflict and...well, I always get a little stressed over the stuff I write. Like it's not good enough."

"But you are amazing, Jaeseop." Kiseop blinked, wondering how someone so obviously perfect could have such unreasonable doubts. He guessed everyone in UKISS was like that in some way.

Jaeseop shrugged and picked at his nails, "You are your own worst critic."

"Well, don't worry about it, if they could find someone better at writing music for us than you, I'm sure they would hire them. But, since they haven't, I guess we've already got the best." Kiseop let out softly, blushing slightly.

Jaeseop smiled at Kiseop's shyness after such a cheesy line and knocked his shoulder against Kiseop's. "What do you want to eat for lunch before we go to the photo shoot?" Jaeseop asked.

Kiseop shrugged, "Are you planning on making something?" Kiseop asked, looking skeptical. Even if he had never seen a product of Jaeseop's cooking attempts, he didn't want to fully trust his skills, because it seemed no one in the group could cook properly if their Chef's Kiss days were any indication.

"I could...but it would probably take longer than we have time for. If I order in, it could be there quickly."

"Ah, let's order in then."

"What?"

"I don't know..." Kiseop mumbled.

"Ah, have you reached your one hundred word limit already today?" Jaeseop teased, but noted that Kiseop seemed to talk more around him than anyone else, regardless of the word count.

Kiseop pouted, though he thought his nickname given to him by Dongho was accurate, it didn't mean he really liked it. It wasn't like he did it intentionally, he just never really had anything to say. That, and sometimes he feared judgment and wouldn't talk because often times he embarrassed himself.

Kiseop went back to staring out the window as Jaeseop pulled out his phone, asking the driver if he knew any good delivery places.

They made it to Jaeseop's house just moments before their food, Jaeseop paid despite Kiseop's suggestion of splitting the bill. They both had the cash to do so after all.

They chatted quietly as they ate, telling jokes and discussing their schedules and excitement over their comeback. At practice today they would be starting the choreography for their new single, and filming for the video would begin a week after that.

"Kiseop, I..." Jaeseop suddenly began to get nervous, "I want to tell you someth-"

As he began to gather more courage, Kiseop's phone blared with his alarm sound, "Ah! We have to go now, or we'll be late for the photo shoot." Kiseop said, standing up and taking his empty plate to Jaeseop's sink, slightly apologetic he wouldn't be able to help clean it. Jaeseop sighed and ran a hand through his hair before following after Kiseop.

After they were settled into Jaeseop's car, Kiseop looked to his friend, "What did you want to tell me?"

Jaeseop shrugged, keeping his eyes focused on the road, "It's nothing important."

"Ah...okay..." Kiseop nodded and sat back in the passenger seat, sneaking looks at Jaeseop every so often. He was thankful he got to spend so much time with Jaeseop out of everyone else, but it made him nervous to the point his stomach was sick, and some nights he couldn't sleep, and then there were his daydreams and he spaced out during important times. He sighed, leaning against the window and finally paying attention to the butterflies in his stomach.

"Gwenchanayo?" Jaeseop asked, letting his eyes linger on Kiseop for a moment as they rested at a red light.

"Mm." Kiseop nodded, closing his eyes, "Just tired." He excused.

"Well, be strong, Seoppie, we have another half of the day to get through." Jaeseop's words only made Kiseop groan out loud and turn his face more onto the window.


 

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ForbiddenLove
Soooo...there's a new chapter....

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kpopchicken
#1
Chapter 27: OKAY THIS STORY WAS AMAZING. LOVED IT.

I'M SAD YOU KEPT DEGRADING YOUR OWN WRITING AT THE END OF EVERY CHAPTER
CAUSE IT WAS GREAT
AND I'M A WRITER TOO AND I GET THE PRESSURE
BUT STILL HAVE CONFIDENCE <3
KillThemLoud #2
Chapter 27: I know you won't see this message, but this was a really great story!!!
pinkmushroom
#3
Chapter 27: Just finished reading this. Honestly, I was screaming most of the time. Out of frustration and joy. xD You did a really good job~
tonyphann #4
Chapter 27: Just read finished reading this! It was cute =D. Awesome job!
TheAlmightyStarlight #5
Chapter 7: Ehehehe sneaky Hoon is sneaky. XD
WeSetOff
#6
Chapter 27: I loved this story. From start to finish it was amazing.
kawaiiboo #7
Chapter 27: Awwrr this was AMAZING!! I love it! Thanks for made this adorable fanfic >3< Please keep writting... <3
lily_ukiss #8
Chapter 27: heeeeey why are you leaving? your stories are great!!!! I was even waiting for blood red illusion's update O_O
I love this chapter like I loved the other chapters! I just wanted to tell you you're not a failure at all....don't give up, think again please,then decide!!! you are one of my favorite authors, well I' not forcing you to stay it's your choice!
love ya<3
(I hope you read this)