Kevin wasn't stupid enough to not see Eli's changes toward him, but he also didn't want to jump to any wrong conclusions. Eli didn't seem to be enjoying their time together anymore, Kevin was hit with that tragic reality once more at the temple when Eli kept spacing out. He would look at Kevin and apologize halfheartedly for not listening and ask him to repeat what he had just said.

Only their kisses seemed to remain the same, giving a little hope to Kevin that maybe their relationship wasn't as doomed to fail as Kevin felt sometimes. Even with the tiny spark of hope, Kevin gripped Eli's hand a little tighter than normal as they sat in the break room to the television station as if releasing it would make Eli fly away like the pigeon he always impersonated.

“I'm worried about Hoon...” He mumbled against Eli's warm shoulder, voicing his second concern instead of the one clogging the foremost part of his brain. They were on a break right now, waiting for lunch that they had ordered out for.

“I know....me too.” Kiseop voiced, pouting in his infamous bubble-cheeked way. This topic seemed to be a reoccurring theme within the group at the moment, and only Jaeseop seemed to be remotely relaxed about it. Not for the first time that day, Kevin wondered if maybe Jaeseop knew something the rest of the members did not.

Eli's hand released Kevin's only to wrap around the petite boy's shoulders for comfort, “We'll call Soohyun to see how he's doing, okay?” Eli dug in his pocket to get to his phone, but Kevin suddenly didn't care. He sank into the warmth of Eli's comforting embrace and closed his eyes, feeling tired all of the sudden.

After a few more minutes, Eli spoke again, “he didn't answer.” His eyebrows knit together as he stared at his phone, the call switching to voice mail after a considerable amount of rings, “does that mean they went to the hospital?” he asked out loud to the concerned members.

“I hope not.” Dongho pouted, worried the most for his friend, “I wonder if maybe it was something he ate...”

“It probably was...Soohyun's probably busy at the store for medicine or something.” Kevin butted in, trying to convince himself of that reality instead of the horrible one with Hoon in the hospital connected to all sorts of tubes.

Kevin sighed, inhaling Eli's perfume, smiling to see that Eli was wearing the 'Love Spell' scent that his sister was so fond of, “how's your family, Eli?” Kevin asked suddenly, the perfume prompting him to ask.

“Uhh, good.” It seemed Eli was caught off guard at Kevin's question, as well, “I talked to them last night, they're great. They miss me a lot, they say, and I miss them, too, but, I should be able to see them during the summer.” Eli smiled, “which I’m super excited for.”

“Ah, that’s good.” Kevin nodded, suddenly a little homesick.

“Why do you ask?”

“I just need something to distract me right now.” Kevin sighed, but not from Hoon’s sickness like everyone seemed to think. Kevin wanted Eli to continue holding him like this, all warm and comforting, because like this it wasn’t as if their relationship was hanging by a tiny thread. Eli squeezed Kevin’s shoulders lightly, rattling the boy against him in the slightest bit. Kevin’s head, once resting upon Eli’s shoulder, slipped down onto his chest, and the young singer listened to his boyfriend’s heart momentarily.

It was normal.

Kevin knew that they had been dating for so long that they were past the initial lovey-dovey honeymoon stage, but his heart always beat faster when Eli held him like this, even if it was just slightly. Even now, his heart was pounding away at Eli’s touch, even if it suddenly turned into a painful sort of sensation. If it were any other time, Kevin wouldn’t have thought much of Eli’s slow and steady beat, but the vibes he has been getting from Eli lately have him high strung and paranoid. Which Kevin thought he had the right to be.

If he didn’t have Eli, Kevin came to the sudden realization, there really wasn’t much for him. He wasn’t all that close with any of the other members, and his family was in another part of the world at times, as was he from them, and he was so busy all the time he never really made friends, not even other Korean idols. Kevin sighed, trying to accept the fact that maybe they should just end their relationship before it got worse. Who knows, they could start fighting all the time, or even cheating.

Kevin flinched at the thought, what if Eli was cheating? What if the distance between them was because he was cheating on Kevin and just felt guilty? What if Kevin was just a doll for Eli to drag around to cover up some other, more important relationship with someone else? Doubt flooded Kevin’s mind, on both accounts.

He didn’t want to believe Eli was cheating on him, but he wasn’t ready to believe that Eli was faithful. His thoughts just got more and more confusing as he went on. Was it better to believe Eli was cheating so that there was a reason for the change, or just accept the fact that Eli was falling out of love for no apparent reason?

Kevin was relieved when the food arrived so that he could eat and get his mind away from his emotional dilemma, but it didn’t help that the Seop-Seop couple was right in front of him, being everything from shy to cute, and obvious to oblivious. Kevin couldn’t see why those two couldn’t just admit their feelings, he thought as Jaeseop held out a chicken leg for Kiseop to take a bit from, Kiseop’s cheeks tinting ever so slightly, it was so obvious to everyone around them.

Kevin thought that even their uninterested maknae would have paid enough attention to see the little signs. Kevin’s eyes slid to Eli, who was quietly eating his chicken, and sighed, putting his own untouched food down. “I’m going to go take a look around the studio, I’ll be back before filming starts again.” He announced, standing up and maneuvering his way out of the dressing room after a chorus of ‘okay’ and ‘see you’, Jaeseop even offered a stern ‘don’t be late’, Kevin smiled knowing that it was what Soohyun would say if he had been here.

He wanted to talk to someone about what he was feeling with Eli, but there really wasn’t anyone he could think of. Dongho was always too busy with other promotions and sidejobs, while Soohyun always stressed over their schedules and meetings. Hoon was with Dongho on the Holyland side project, and since then was always helping Soohyun. Kiseop and Jaeseop were always together and Kevin didn’t want to bother them and their mushy-gushy-couple-love time.

And of course he couldn’t talk to Eli about it, for obvious reasons. Kevin frowned, trailing his finger along the wall and feeling miserable. He wanted to wish he never entered into a relationship with Eli, to never have fallen in love, but he knew he couldn’t. In the two years they had been together, up until recently, everything had been perfect between them.

Absolutely perfect.

What Kevin did regret thinking that perfect existed. Or that love lasted. Kevin didn’t think he would ever stop loving Eli, but he didn’t want to cling desperately to him either, or even make Eli think he had to be with him. That’s when he came to the decision.

It hurt to think about, but knowing Eli didn’t love him anymore hurt him even more. For the sake of their friendship, they would have to break up. Kevin leaned against the wall and hid his face in his hands, trying not to cry and ruin his makeup, but it didn’t work, as he began to sob. At least if he let it all out now and accepted it, he wouldn’t cry so much when it actually did happen.

By the time they were back in South Korea, ElVin won’t exist anymore.

ELVIN~~~~~~~~!!!!!!! TT.TT

I can't accept that fact that I am making them this way. There will be lots of suffering for poor little Kevin dear. TT.TT

KEVIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I STILL LOVE YOU OPPA! >.<

Ah~! I haven't written for a little time and this is how it turns out.

I'm sorry I gave you such a sad chapter, I'll try to make the next one extra cute for you. After all, it is 2Seop. ^.^