I didn't like this feeling. The feeling of dread. Why? Why of all times and of all people. Why do I have to room with Jung Yunho? I had already forgiven him for what he had done, but I was sure he didn't understand at all. He hadn't said one word to me since we moved back home. I was sure he avoided seeing me too.

"No. I don't like it. Changmin, can't you room with Yunho?" Junsu was worried. He knew what Yunho was capable of. He knew what had happened the last time. Changmin nodded. He was obviously worried too.

"I'm sorry, young masters. The rules have to be followed though. Jaejoong will room with Yunho and Junsu will room with Yoochun. Changmin gets the single room."

I looked to Junsu for help, but there was nothing he could do. There was nothing any of us could do. I reluctantly followed Yunho down the opposite hallway where they showed us the room. Yunho sat down in the center of the room immediately. I hung by the door.

"Why don't you hurry and get changed. You can visit the hot springs and then we will call you for dinner?"

I opened my mouth, but nothing came out. I was left here alone with Yunho...who was staring at me. I stared at the floor. I had never felt like such a child in front of his gaze before. I kneeled down in the corner, taking out the clothes I was going to change into.

"You've changed a lot. Kim Jaejoong."

I looked up to find that Yunho had moved. He was shifting his weight only a few feet from me. I watched him carefully. He made me nervous. I wasn't sure what he was doing.

He was looking me up and down. It was like he was trying to figure out something that wasn't yet visible to his eyes. I rushed into the bathroom, locking the door quickly. I fidgeted nervously inside. I hadn't shared a room with Yunho in a long time. I wondered if I could really sleep like this. Live like this.

As soon as I was done I opened the door cautiously before hurrying back into the corner where my bag was waiting. I gently put the worn clothes into the bag before heading towards the door to the hallway.

"Wait for me!"

Yunho bumped into me as he reached for the door as well. I pushed him away from me, gently backing into the corner. He smelled good, his usual cologne spreading across the room.

"Jaejoong?"

Yunho was staring at me with his deep eyes. I couldn't meet them.

"Jaejoong! Let's go!"

Changmin was in our room all of a sudden. I was glad he had come. It felt like my heart was about to burst. It already knew what my mind had known. I still loved Yunho. After all the waiting and all the pain...I still loved him. A person like me, who couldn't protect his baby, was still undeniably in love with Jung Yunho.

"Hyung!? You aren't going to swim at all? Why are you just wearing shorts!"

Changmin scolded lightly, but his arm was around me. He was silently telling me that he was there. He was going to take care of me. I felt so relaxed around him. Between us, things didn't seem like it would be hard to go back to where we had been.

"Jaejoong!" Junsu seemed relieved. He was already in the hot spring, splashing around with Yoochun. I sat a little ways from the water as I watched them play. I wasn't willing to show my body to them. I hadn't healed completely yet. Or atleast my body hadnt fully healed from the surgery. I wasn't willing to show that to Yunho or Changmin. They weren't ready to know yet.

I smiled from the side. Yunho was awkward. He just stood at the far side of the hot spring while the other three played happily. It made me very aware that Yunho seemed to be the source of the unfriendliness. I dropped my eyes away from the group. I felt tired, even though I had slept a lot on the way here. I leaned backwards slightly, closing my eyes.

::Yunho P.O.V.::

Dinner had been delicious. It seemed like a memory from the past. We were gathered around a table for the first time since their disappearance. It almost seemed too good to be true. I was even able to loosen up a little bit. Even I couldn't hold a grudge forever. Not when the people I had loved and missed were finally back. I couldn't keep acting angry and indifferent or I was going to lose all of them again. I didn't want to lose them ever again. I just wanted to be together with them, forever.

After dinner, I led the way to our room. Jaejoong was stumbling around from exhaustion, which made the short walk quite amusing. I set up closer to the wall to fall asleep. I was willing to give Jaejoong all the room he needed. He ended up stayin in his corner, curled up uncomfortably. It was disturbing to me that he was unwilling to get even a little bit closer to me.

"Kim Jaejoong. Why don't you spread out more?"

He didn't even lift his head to respond. I sighed loudly. Even though I didn't want to admit it, I was disappointed and sad. I hated to be rejected like this. I decided to forget it until tomorrow. Everything could be fixed tomorrow because I was finally ready to confront it.

I was surprised though when I heard Jaejoong suddenly get up from bed and leave the room. I got up myself. What if he got lost...or scared? It seemed way too possible with his current personality. I followed him outside, deciding that I couldn't leave him alone...just in case something happened.

I followed him all the way to the hot springs where he walked very close to the edges. I watched as he daringly stood over the water in his pajamas.

"Jaejoong! Don't!" I had thought I had seen him falling, and I wanted to call out a warning. However, I only disturbed his concentration. I was the reason for why fell into hot spring. I went to him without hesitation and helped pull him out of the water. He was coughing and spluttering, but my focus was on something else.

I reached out to touch the scar across his stomach. He responded by quickly pulling down his shirt and turning away.

I couldn't go on like this anymore. I couldn't live without knowing.

~~Flashback~~

"HE LEFT TO PROTECT THE BABY YOU LEFT INSIDE HIM!"

The room had gone silent after Junsu's outburst. I could see that he was shocked at hisself as well.

"What did you say?"

I grabbed his arms. I needed to hear it again. I needed to know the truth.

"No...I can't tell you. If you want to know, you have to ask Jaejoong."

Junsu tried to spin...tried to leave but I had to stop him.

"He was pregnant, Junsu?"

Junsu refused to answer me though and he fled the living room soon after.

I thought about what he had said. I couldn't have heard it wrong. Junsu had said clearly that Jaejoong had been carrying my baby. However, I needed the truth. I needed to hear it from Jaejoong.

~~End Flashback~~

"Jaejoong!"

I sat in front of him, holding his arms even though he didn't like it.

"Our baby...Jaejoong. Where is our baby?"

I could see his eyes widen, briefly meet my own before he pushed me away. There had been tears in his eyes and fear. However, he fled the room before I could get to the bottom.

When I entered our room, I could barely see Jaejoong laying in his corner. I sighed.

"You're going to get sick if you don't change. You're soaked."

I sat close to him. I didn't want him to avoid me. I realized then, that he wasn't avoiding me at all. Instead, he was sobbing.

I gently laid down beside him. I hesitated. I knew I had to do it, I had to comfort him even though I didn't know what had happened, but it wasn't easy. I didn't like being rejected, and I was sure he was going to. That meant I had to attack. I had to hold onto him without letting him push me away. I gently found his waist before tightening my grasp on him. Of course he struggled just as I predicted, but it was weak. He was more worried about the tears that were falling.

"Tell me later Jaejoong. Just...let's just stay like this for one night."