We somehow made it back to my dorms without too much trouble. Wonwoo clearly has some issues he needs to work through and I’m happy to help him with that. The way he acted tonight caught me off guard and made me see just how fragile of a person he is. And somehow it makes my heart break into a thousand little pieces. The way he asked me to not hurt him. This is not a normal reaction for a boy our age. The things he has been through must have been so bad, so scarring that he thinks everyone is going to do that to him. I, for one, will try to never hurt him.

There is one other thing I can’t do either. And that is fix him. The way I see it, he wants me to help fix him. But this is something he’ll have to do for himself. And not for me. I do want to be there every single step of the way.

“I’ll see you in the morning…” Wonwoo says shyly before kissing my cheek and walking off. He doesn’t look back or say something else. The dynamic between us has changed considerably.

Tonight there are no texts, suggesting things. Tonight, I fall asleep, worried. What if he is crying all by himself? What if he thinks he’s not good enough for anyone? I can’t stand that thought.

Morning comes way too slowly and I have not slept a single wink. I’m up at the brink of dawn, going for a run. Normally I work out more, but the last few weeks I’ve been slacking off thanks to Uni. Running always seems to calm me and clear my mind. I don’t even bring my music with me since the sounds of the city are music to my ears anyways. All the cars and all the noise drowns out my thoughts. It’s the only thing I need.

I find myself at the bank of the Han river, staring out at the water. It’s so calm this morning, just swaying back and forth. There are no ships or people at all on the river. The weather is steadily turning cold again and people tend to stay in during these times. I slowly rake my hand through my hair while I let out a big sigh. Things are not easy.

The run back is not any easier. Wonwoo keeps spooking through my mind all the time. He pops up every single time I see a couple walking by. It doesn’t matter if they are boy and girl, it shouldn’t matter anyway. I have never thought of myself as someone who likes OR boys OR girls. I don’t care about such things. The only things that matter are who that person is and how they treat you. is just a side thing we should not care about.

Class starts again and I can’t focus at all. Wonwoo told me he’d see me in the morning, but where? We don’t have class together until next week. And he’s not at the door of my classes. Was he just reassuring me? Is he okay? Damn, I want to know now.

“Are you okay? When and where do we meet?” I send him in a text. My worries take the best of me. Hansol is sitting next to me and sees me fidgeting all the time. At one point he even takes my phone away from me.

“It’s not going to make them text you back any faster…” he says in a low tone while he keeps his gaze trained on the screen in front of the class. He does have a point, but I don’t like people touching my phone. Especially not now when I want Wonwoo to text me back asap.

“I’m sorry…” I mumble and reach out to take my phone back. He puts it inside of his pocket on the other side of his jeans. I’m about to whine, but realise I’m in the middle of class.

“I’ll let you know if this person texts you back… meanwhile, you focus on class”, he says in stern voice. He always does this. I kind of hate it, but it’s good for me. I need someone to put me in my place sometimes.

The rest of class just goes by. I don’t get a text back from Wonwoo at all. It’s kind of disappointing to get my phone back from Hansol while no one has texted me back yet. H