Chapter 17: Dried Tears
Can you love me?Jimin’s POV:
I cried for many days. Never leaving the spot where Jungkook left me. God knows how much I wanted this to be fake. A dream.
“Jimin!” I looked up, only to see Tae and Hoseok-hyung.
“…” I smiled before I fainted.
Was it too much for me to ask for an relationship? i wanted company. But I loved Kookie. I LOVE him, I always do.
“Jimin! You’re awake!” Tae exclaimed.
“Water…” Immediately a cup was shoved into my hand and I drank from it. My throat felt like sandpaper.
“How are you feeling?”
Am I a bad person?
“Fine. How’s everyone else?”
“Well, me and Yoongi-hyung are going out on a date tomorrow! Tae Tae and Eunji-shi are coming too as a double date. Namjin is still strong, there are planning an vacation soon and…”
“And..?” My voice was raspy. It hurts so much. But I needed to know what I want to hear.
“Jungkook is…dating Wonwoo-shi.” My heart stopped for moments. W-Wonwoo?!
“Oh okay.” I said, struggling to hold back my tears.
A knock came from the door, and the doctor appeared. Tae and Hope-hyung left for my private talk with the doctor.
“Jimin-shi.”
“Y-yes?”
“I’m afraid…”
There was once Jungkook asked me what was love.
“Hyung what is love?”
“Don’t you already know?” I chuckled. We were at the rooftop, near the evening. It was cooling, yet not dark yet. We were enjoying the sunset. His head was on my shoulder and I rested my head on top of his.
“Well define it please~~~”
“To me, love is…something that is worth holding on to, something to look forward to everyday. It’s like…a battery you know? Once you it runs out, you can never get it back again.”
“What about a rechargeable battery?” He giggled.
“Well it works, but think of it this way. You only recharge the battery when it’s low, in terms of love, wouldn’t that be holding on to something that seems to exist?”
“So it’s like, not real love?”
“Not really. It’s like both are sort of fighting for the relationship, yet at the same time let go of it without knowing, but wants to hold on.”
“I see. Then I’ll be the battery for you that doesn’t run out at all!”
“You already are…” I whispered so softly.
“What?”
“Nothing pabo. Jesus do you have hearing problems or wha- yah Jungkook!”
Did he know, he was like the battery to me?
“Maybe I don’t want it after all.”
“A-Are you sure? Jimin-shi why would you not want it? Is there something wrong?”
“I…I guess it’s not worth it. Can I be discharged?”
“Y-Yeah you can. Please…take care of yourself okay?” I nodded and a few hours later I was out of the hospital.
I put on the hoodie, wear my mask and headed out.
“Oh sorry!” I blurted out when I bumped into someone. The person just ignored me and rushed into the hospital.
“Rude.” I sighed before heading home.
And once when Kookie got really jealous when I hung out with another close friend.
“Kookie~~~”
“Go away.”
“I’m legit not with him! I only love you remember?”
“Really?”
“Yeah forever!”
“I don’t believe you.”
"Don't worry, I'll always love you no matter what."
"I'm sorry, I love you too. Thank you..."
“For what?”
“For misunderstanding you, loving you, and having you in my life.”
“Cheesy brat!”
“But you love me~~~”
“So do you.”
“Shorty.”
“YAH JEON JUNGKOO-“ I got hushed by Kookie’s lips. I blushed a thousand times red.
“You’re prettier when you’re like this.” He whispered and pecked my lips one more time.
Yet I found myself having second thought about our relationship.
“Kookie?
“Ne.”
“What’s happiness?”
“Hmm…being with something or someone you enjoy being with and fulfilling your wishes.”
“Same here.” But it’s only for you.
Every wish I made was for you. Did you do the same? I wondered sometimes.
Sometimes he would ignore me, sometimes really clingy. But I still love him. He’s perfect. My one and only.
“Hyung when would you stop loving me?”
“When time stops.”
“You mean forever?”
“Nah, I mean when time stops on myself. When I die.”
“W-why?!”
“Because you have to find someone better for yourself and your future. Think about it.”
“…” Did he agree?
Did he ever love me?
Probably not.
DOUBLE UPDATE AHHH IM LEGIT SCARED AND DISAPPOINTED RIGHT NOW. I RUSHED THROUGH SO MANY STUFF BECAUSE ITS ALL FLOODING AND CLOGGING UP MY BRAIN.
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